公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation S02E04
Part 1
Jan. 27, 2024, 11:41 a.m.
并且 我需要对我的夫人道歉
And to my wife, I apologize.
我能说的是那不只是性
All I can say is I wasn't just having sex,
我是在做♥爱♥ 和一位美丽的女性
I was making love to a beautiful woman
及其男友
and her boyfriend,
还有一位我不知名字的人士
and a third person, whose name I never learned.
此外 我不该谎称
Furthermore, it was wrong of me to say
自己在为低收入群体建房♥子
I was building houses for the underprivileged,
但实际上我在巴西的一个洞穴里玩4P做♥爱♥
when I was actually having four-way sex in a cave in Brazil.
洞穴里做♥爱♥肯定爽翻
I bet cave sex is insane.
为什么
Why?
因为回声和湿度
Because of the echoes and the humidity.
嗯哼
Mmm-hmm.
出于自辩 那天是我生日
In my defense, it was my birthday
而且我也很想做
and I really wanted to do it.
人们只盯着丑闻的俗气细节 我觉得很丢人
I think it's a real shame when people focus on the tawdry details of a scandal.
个人来讲 我只关心Dexhart议员的政策
Personally, all I care about is Councilman Dexhart's policies.
而不是他在洞穴性♥爱♥里吸高了笑气和可♥卡♥因♥的事实
Not whether he was high on nitrous and cocaine during the cave sex.
不过我听说 确实是
Which, by the way, I heard he was.
令人震惊的败露竟还没有结束这个故事
One more shocking revelation in a story that just won't stop unfolding.
看来为出轨而道歉的Dexhart议员
It turns out Councilman Dexhart may have also had sex with a prostitute
在这次新闻发布会的来回路上
in the limousine on the way to and from the press conference
甚至还在豪车内与妓♥女♥车震
where he apologized for having an affair.
Perd Hapley 第四频道 《目击者新闻》
Perd Hapley, Channel Four Eyewitness News.
为什么会有人想竞选公职
Why does anybody wanna run for public office?
简直是希望完全暴露自己的私生活
You're just asking to have your entire life exposed.
如果你坐怀不乱 像我一样 那就没问题
Well, if you're squeaky clean, like I am, there's no problem.
Tom 你一个已婚人士还一天到晚和女人调情
Tom, you're married, and you hit on women constantly.
是的 但我从来不越雷池 只是观光
Yeah, but I've never sealed the deal. Just window-shopping.
飞去巴西但是不进洞 对吧
You can fly to Brazil, just don't enter the cave. Am I right?
击掌
Up top!
公园
与
游憩
公园
与
游憩
公园
与
游憩
第2季 第4集
第2季 第4集
我肯定你觉得自己是干净的
I'm sure that you think that you're clean,
但我赌我们能从你身上找点东西
but I bet that we could find something on you.
我换了名字 这是合法的
I changed my name, which is legal,
然后高中有一次在摔跤比赛中输给了女孩子
and once in high school, a girl beat me in a wrestling match.
就这些了
That's it.
我能在你们身上找到更见不得人的 随便打赌
I bet anything I could find worse stuff on all you guys.
你是在发起游戏吗
Are you suggesting a game?
我加入 - 还有我
I'm in. - I'm in.
我就算了 - 你没选择 Jerry
I'm out. - Not an option, Jerry.
你完蛋了
You're going down.
不 正经的 我真的不想参与
No, seriously, I really don't wanna play.
不 不 正经的 你得参与 我们会打败你
No, no. Seriously, you are playing. We're gonna nail you.
我也加入
I will play, too,
但只是为了证明我会在你们身上找到更多的脏事
if only to prove that I can find more dirt on you than you can on me.
这就是我们玩的原因啊
That's why we're all playing.
你的桌子在那边呢
Your desk is over there.
我喜欢让人针锋相对的游戏
I love games that turn people against each other.
你们绝对想不到我刚在Jerry的Facebook上发现了什么
You guys will never believe what I just found on Jerry's Facebook.
一个好友 伤到啦
A friend. Burn.
好吧 再说一次 我真的不想玩
Okay, again, I'd really rather not play.
嘿 大伙 都在干嘛呢
Hey, guys. What are you guys doing?
我们在互挖对方的黑历史
Trying to see who has the least amount of dirt on them
看谁的少到能去竞选
in case someone wants to run for office.
肯定不是Jerry了 我确定
Well, it ain't Jerry. That's for sure.
什么
What?
嗯 他身上有几个359 随地小便
Well, he's got a couple of 359s on him. Public urination.
我不喜欢这个游戏 真的不喜欢
I don't like this game. I just don't like it.
他估计被气到去院子里尿了
He's probably gonna go anger-pee in the courtyard.
你们这帮公园疯子 我走了
Well, you crazy park people, I'm out of here.
Leslie 我们明天见
Leslie, I'll see you tomorrow.
明天是 我们的
Tomorrow, will be our
第一次正式 首次约会
first official... First date.
收到
Roger that.
收到 通话完毕
Copy. Over and out.
Dave和我明天第一次约会
Dave and I are going on our first date tomorrow.
我不紧张
I'm not nervous.
我为什么要紧张呢
Why should I be nervous?
我们就是两个首次约会的人而已
We're just two people going on a first date.
没什么需要紧张的
There's nothing to be nervous about.
那是我的手♥机♥
That was my phone.
嘿 - 嘿 你好啊
Hey. - Hey. Hi there.
你在 你来这里干什么
What are you... What are you doing here?
就来和Leslie吃个饭 你要去哪
Just having lunch with Leslie. What are you up to?
哦 我在寻找我同事的丑闻
Oh, I'm looking for scandalous information about my co-workers,
这是个游戏
for a game that we're playing.
我交的税付你的工资 对吧
My taxes pay your salary, right?
是的 - 棒哦
Yeah. - Cool.
然后他抬头看着我
And he looked up at me,
他说 "谢谢 你救了我的命"
and he said, "Thank you. You saved my life."
嗯 听我说 明天约会 我真的很紧张
Yeah. Hey, listen, I'm really nervous about this date tomorrow night.
你有 类似 第一次约会装我可以借用吗
Do you have, like, a first date outfit I can borrow?
比如 我不知道 工装裤之类的
Like, I don't know, a pair of cargo pants?
要是我就不会穿工装裤
Yeah, I wouldn't go with a cargo pant.
或者 性感的帽子呢
What about, like, a sexy hat?
我甚至不知道那是什么意思
I don't know what that even is.
已经帮上了
Helping already.
你今天下班之后就来一趟吧
Do you wanna just come by after work today?
好啊 行 今晚
Sure. Yeah. Tonight?
几个小时之后
Several hours from now?
或者你现在就过来
Or you could just come over now?
我觉得更好
I think that would be better.
是的 时间充足些 我们走
Yeah, that would give us more time. Let's go.
哦 你们做什么呢
Oh, what you doing, guys?
挖我的黑历史吗 没用的
Looking for dirt on me? No point.
放弃吧
Give up now.
哦 等等 这有个东西
Oh, wait, there's this.
各位 我早上买♥♥了个牛角三明治
Everybody, I bought a Croissan'wich this morning.
这都不是收据 只是张纸
This isn't even a real receipt. Just a scrap of paper.
塔♥利♥班♥袍子!
Taliban robes!
什么
What?
哪搞到的照片
Where'd you get that photo from?
嘿 Tom 好漂亮的塔♥利♥班♥袍子
Hey, Tom. Nice Taliban robes.
那些不是塔♥利♥班♥袍子
Those aren't Taliban robes.
那是十年前的万圣节 我扮成绝地武士
That's from Halloween, 10 years ago. I was dressed like a Jedi.
我觉得选民们能分出区别的
I'm sure that the voters would be able to tell the difference.
嗯 看起来你就是塔♥利♥班♥成员
Mmm, looks to me like you're in the Taliban.
哦这样 所有人都知道Ron的前妻 Tammy
Well, did everybody know that Ron's ex-wife, Tammy,
实际上是他第二个叫Tammy的前妻吗
is actually his second ex-wife named Tammy?
是的 Ron有两任前妻 都 叫 Tammy
That's right. Ron has two ex-wives, each named Tammy.
两个都是婊♥子♥
Both of them bitches.
是的 我妈的名字也是Tammy
Yes, my mom's name is Tammy.
你什么意思
What's your point?
Tom 那是个高级秘密
Tom, that was a Jaeger-secret.
你泄露了一个高级秘密
You just breached a Jaeger-secret.
该死 战火真是迅速升温啊
Damn, this just heated up quick!
看看
Ta-da!
挺好看的 - 是么
That looks great. - Yeah?
夫人 您今天会把这件带走吗
Will you be wearing it out of the store today, madame?
我想我可以 好姑娘
I think I will, good lady.
时机正好 我能问你个问题吗
Hey, while I have you, can I ask you a question?
说
Shoot.
如果他问我是不是结过婚怎么办
What if he asks me if I've been married?
你结过 - 没
Have you? - No.
那就那么说啊
Well, then, say that.
但他就会想我为什么没结过
公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation
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