公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation S02E12
Part 1
Jan. 27, 2024, 11:42 a.m.
Pawnee市政♥府♥歌♥舞剧 由公园与娱乐部门带来
接下来是Bill Dexhart议员的现场直播
We now go live to Councilman Bill Dexhart,
他正在召开关于他性丑闻的新闻发布会
who's giving a press conference about his sex scandal.
你将看到的是很少见的 政♥府♥独家项目
You are getting a rare glimpse at this exclusive, government-only event.
每年十二月 一个部门都要出一个节目
Each December, one department puts on a show
吐槽镇上发生的事情
that spoofs what happened in our town.
准备好笑掉大牙吧
Prepare to laugh your Asnov!
习大牙是前任市议员 有些笑点是内部笑话
Sid Asnov is a former city councilman. Some of the jokes are sort of inside.
Dexhart议员 你又卷入另一场丑闻了吗
Councilman Dexhart, you're involved in yet another scandal?
这比Gunderson市长的狗Rufus还要疯狂啊
That's crazier than Mayor Gunderson's dog, Rufus.
是的 确实有个新的 而且是个极品
Yes, there is a new one, and it's a doozie.
我不想展开细节 但只想说
I don't want to go into the details, but let me just say
涉及了多个女人 一个私生子
that it involves multiple women, a love child,
护士 犹太教士 牧师...
nurses, rabbis, priests...
不是吧
Hey!
我希望你们都能参与我今晚的筹款会
Well, I hope you can all join me at my fundraiser tonight.
当然 特别鸣谢亮片工厂和1-800-床垫的大力支持
I am being supported, of course, by the Glitter Factory and 1-800-Mattress.
经典
Classic!
*Pawnee是个不太美的城市*
Pawnee is a city that ain't very pretty
*好政♥府♥是我们的目标*
And good government is our goal
*我们或许不太大 市长还要戴假发*
We may not be big And our mayor wears a wig
*但至少浣熊蔓延规模已经开始慢慢变小*
But at least the raccoon infestation is under control
*这是最好的时光*
It's the most wonderful time
*就 在 Pawnee*
in Pawnee
公园
与
游憩
公园
与
游憩
公园
与
游憩
第2季 第12集
第2季 第12集
48号♥地原来是一个讨厌而恶心的大坑
Lot 48 was once a horrible and disgusting pit,
现在它成了Pawnee的冬日乐园
and now it's the site of Pawnee's Winter Wonderland.
如果这是我自己计划设计的就好了
This could not be more perfect if I had planned it myself.
哦确实是我♥干♥的 它太棒了
Which I did. And it's awesome.
我们来讲安排
So, let's talk skedge, guys.
孩子们周六早上9点来玩
The kids are gonna come at 9:00 a.m. on Saturday,
每个人当两小时的圣诞老人
and everyone's gonna do Santa for two hours,
所以我建议所有人
so I would just advise everyone,
穿上服装之前
before you get in your costume,
先去洗手间 以避免去年发生的事情
to go to the bathroom, so we can avoid what happened last year.
只是几个屁而已
It was just farts.
晚上6点 与少年唱诗班一起唱颂歌♥
6:00 p.m., caroling with the youth choir,
我很荣幸宣布 今年
and I am proud to announce, for the first time ever this year,
是我们首次在网络电台直播圣诞树点灯活动
our tree lighting ceremony will be simulcast on Internet radio.
谢谢
Thank you.
那可是件大事 - 确实是 谢谢
That's a really big deal. - It is. Thank you.
听见那棵树亮起来肯定赞爆了
Listening to that tree lighting is gonna be dope.
好的 有任何问题 来找我 解散
Okay. Any questions, direct them to me. Dismissed.
嘿 呃 工作语♥音♥信箱有条消息
Hey, uh, there was a message for you on the work voicemail.
Dexhart议员想要见你
Councilman Dexhart wants to meet with you
晚9点 木板路酒廊
at 9:00 p.m. at the The Boardwalk Lounge.
骗我 - 才没
Shut up. - No.
我才不怕呢 我没有啥好道歉的
I'm not scared. I got nothing to apologize for.
我本来可以更刁难一点的 太轻易就让他"释放"了
I could've been a lot harder on him. He got off easy.
他也经常 谢谢 我一周都在
And often. Thank you, I'll be here all week!
你得跟我说说他 我对他一无所知
You gotta tell me about him. I don't know anything about him.
好的 他23 他差不多是我男友 他是同
Okay. He's 23, he's kind of my boyfriend, he's gay.
去年我们喝醉了 他带我去冰雪世界
Last year we got drunk and he took me to the Ice Capades,
而我啥都没送给他
and I didn't get him anything.
他是同 - 是啊
And he's gay? - Yeah.
《断背山》DVD
Brokeback Mountain DVD.
不 - 同志最爱
No. - Fellows love that.
不 - 他已经有那种 皮裤吗
No. - Does he already have, like, chaps?
像露臀皮裤那种 - 唉 算了
Like assless chaps? - You know what? Forget it.
好吧 为什么来问我
Okay. Why are you asking me?
因为...我也不知道 没人可问了
Because... I don't know. There's no one else to ask.
至少你还算是年轻
At least you're kind of young.
好 跟你说 我好好想想
All right, I'll tell you what. I'm gonna think about it.
接下来一整天 我都会来回思考
Through the course of all day, I'm gonna mull it over.
我只想这个 但你放心
It's all I'm gonna think about, but you're in good hands.
我会想到很好很好的东西
I'm gonna come up with something really, really good.
是吗 - 是 - 好
Really? - Yeah. - All right.
这个你会吗 - 会
You got that? - Yeah.
Dexhart议员 我是Leslie Knope
Councilman Dexhart? I'm Leslie Knope.
感谢你来见我
Thank you for meeting me.
不用谢
It's my pleasure.
我假设你约我是关于我
I am assuming this is about my performance
昨晚在政♥府♥歌♥舞剧里的表演
in the Government Follies last night.
我只想说我没有需要道歉的地方
I'd just like to say that I have nothing to apologize for,
除了大概过于尖锐
except for perhaps being too incisive.
我不需要你道歉
I don't want you to apologize.
我想知道是谁说的
I want to know who told you.
谁说的 - 嗯哼
Who told me? - Mmm-hmm.
没有人 没有人啥都没说
Nobody. Nobody told me nothing!
我们在说什么
What are we talking about?
根据那段表演
Based on that skit,
我知道你听说了接下来将要曝出的新丑闻
I know you heard about the new scandal that's about to break.
谁跟你说的 是那个保姆
Who told you? Was it the babysitter?
是那个接生了我私生子的护士
Was it the nurse who delivered our love child?
什么 - 够了 别装傻了
What? - All right, stop playing dumb.
发生了什么你明白得很
You know damn well what happened.
我把保姆搞怀孕了
I got the babysitter pregnant,
当她在产房♥的时候 我和
then when she was in the delivery room, I had sex with not one,
不止一个 而是四个护士在储备室里做♥爱♥
but four nurses in a supply closet,
还有一个丈夫在接受肝移植的女人 嗯
as well as a woman whose husband was getting a liver transplant. Mmm.
现在 她们之中是谁告诉你的 是那个肝女士吗
Now, which one of them told you? Was it the liver lady?
这 我...没人...我没...我从没听过这些
Well, I... No one... I haven't... I haven't heard any of this,
这辈子从没听说这些事情
ever, in my whole life.
哦
Oh!
相信我 要听说了我肯定会记得的
Believe me, I would have remembered this.
好 那样的话
Okay. Well, in that case,
刚刚跟你说的一切都是个好笑的恶作剧
everything I just told you was just a funny prank.
哦 嗨 见面如何
Oh! Hi! How was your meeting?
挺好 挺直接的
It was fine. Pretty straightforward.
很简短 他很忙
Short meeting. He's a busy guy.
是的 很忙 看看这篇文章
Yes, very busy. Look at this article.
Pawnee太阳报
性感Dexy再次进攻
不
No!
什么...
What the...
这个故事的故事是它不停地发展
The story of this story is that it won't stop developing.
昨晚Dexhart议员见过的那个神秘女子
The mystery woman who met with Councilman Dexhart last night
被曝是一位政♥府♥雇员 名为Leslie Norp
appears to be a government employee named Leslie Norp.
哦 我的天啊 哦天啊
Oh, my God! Oh, God!
根据Pawnee太阳报未确认的报道
According to unconfirmed reports in the Pawnee Sun,
二位在本地某间酒吧彻夜畅饮
the two bent an elbow at this local watering hole,
虽然他们分别离开
and although they left separately,
没有人知道他们在哪一同醒来
no one knows where they woke up together.
第4频道新闻 Perd Hapley 报道
Perd Hapley, Channel Four News.
我做过的只是写了剧本并进行了一段精彩的表演
All I did was write and perform in one amazing skit.
Leslie 只是Pawnee太阳报 小报而已
Leslie, it's the Pawnee Sun. It's a tabloid.
没有别人写过这件事了
Nobody else has written about it.
是的 没人相信那种垃圾报纸
Yeah, no one believes that garbage.
甚至根本没人读
Nobody even reads that thing.
Leslie 咋滴 干得漂亮 妹子
Leslie! What? Nice work, girl.
哦天哪 我怎么还击 给我点选择
Oh, God! How do I fight back? Give me some options.
你需要我去勾引Perd Hapley吗
Do you want me to seduce Perd Hapley?
那怎么能帮忙
How would that help?
我不知道 我只是想看看我能不能做到
I don't know. I just want to see if I can do it.
April 很感激你 但我觉得这不是
April, I appreciate that, but I don't think it's something
值得你失去贞洁的事情
worth losing your virginity over.
Leslie 我不知道这些重不重要
Leslie, I don't know if this is important or not,
公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation
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