最后一人（2011）

Last Man Standing S06E10

Part 3 March 19, 2021, 1:02 p.m.

jerky, but not the pepper teriyaki
因为他们从不对胡椒开玩笑
'cause they are not
kidding about the pepper.
然后我会和他们干一架
And then I take the fight to them...
吹响号♥角吸引僵尸过来
sounding the horn, attracting the zombies,
开始一场全面战争
and starting a full-scale war.
积极行动我很喜欢
Aggressive. I like it.
Ryan 请说
Ryan, proceed.
哦首先我会戴上墨镜
Oh, well, uh, first I'd get sunglasses...
已经日落了你个二货
It's sundown, numb-nuts.
这样超级僵尸就不能用眼神转化我了
...so the super zombie
can't turn me with a stare.
哦我也有墨镜的
Oh, I had those, too.
嗯我相信你会的
Yeah, I'm sure you would.
现在
Now.
然后我会把Kristin和Boyd也接上车
And then I would load Kristin
and Boyd into the truck.
嗯保护家人额外附加分
Mm, bonus points for family protection.
哦对了 Mandy也可我在一起我只是刚才忘记说了
Oh, right, and Mandy's with
me. I just forgot to say that.
不太迟了她自己一个人
Nope. It's too late. She's on her own.
不过她应该没事因为僵尸喜欢脑子
Although she might be okay
because zombies feast on brains,
而她好吧没有多少
and, well, she has very little to offer.
然后我会去买♥♥些东西
And next I would do some shopping.
我会去买♥♥种子肥料工具亮闪闪的生日气球
I'd get seeds, fertilizer,
tools, shiny birthday balloons.
生日气球？
Birthday balloons?
还有呢？西班牙糖果彩罐？
What else? A piñata?
然后我会直奔山里找到适合耕种的土地
And then I'd head to the
mountains, find fertile land
和有天然屏障的淡水水源
and a fresh water source
with natural barriers.
我会种庄稼搭棚屋并把气球挂在周围
I'd plant crops, build a shelter, and
hang the balloons around the perimeter,
因为蝙蝠的超声波会被聚酯薄膜挡回去
because bats are repelled by Mylar.
哇哦
Whoa.
看来我们的胜者产生了
Looks like we have a winner.
我不想指明是谁但是他留胡子而且他的名字是Ryan
I don't want to say who, but
he's got a beard and his name is Ryan.
Vogelson.
嘿 10分钟之后开饭
Hey, dinner's ready in 10.
嘿过来一下
Hey, come out here a sec.
你知道当我说了一些很聪明的话之后你说“Mike 你是个天才”吗？
You know when I say something real smart
and you go, "Mike, you're a genius"?
不知道
No.
好吧但是应该这样
Well, that's how it should be.
你在这儿看到了什么？
What do you see here?
一辆卡车
A truck.
不对你看到了一辆1956年的福特卡车
No, you see a 1956 Ford truck.
它是经典款
It's a classic.
Mike你是个天才现在我能走了吧？
Mike, you're a genius. Can I go now?
再等一下我们坐着它开出去的时候发生了什么？
Just a second. What happens
when we drive around in it?
呃你要我把鞋子脱了
Um, you make me take my shoes off.
我知道但是除了那个呢
I know, but other than that.
我不准喷香水
I'm not allowed to wear perfume.
呃是还有呢？
Uh, yeah, besides that. And?
我什么都不能碰
I can't touch anything.
对还有我不喜欢在里面嚼口香糖但是……
Right, and I don't like gum
in there, too, but really...
好吧当我们开车兜风的时候其他人看见我们是怎么做的？
All right. When we're driving around,
what do other people do when they see us?
他们这么做
They do this.
- 知道他们为什么这么做吗？ - 为什么？
- You know why they do that?
- Why?
这辆卡车比你老但是它经典
This truck is older than
you, but it's a classic,
而且人们意识到了它很经典
and people realize it's a classic.
而你也是很经典的
And you're a classic, too.
真会哄人啊
How flattering.
我是一辆老卡车
I'm an old truck.
不不不我不是这个意思
No, no, no, no. That's not what I meant.
这不是一辆老卡车
This is not an old truck.
我修复它之前它是辆老卡车
It was an old truck until I restored it.
而我为什么要修复它？
And why did I do that?
因为我了解汽车我看到了它的价值
Because I know cars, and
I recognized its value.
但是没有人看到我的价值 Mike
Well, no one is recognizing mine, Mike.
但是会有人看到的
But they will.
懂得教学的人会看到你真正的价值的
Somebody who knows something about teaching
is gonna recognize your real value.
我相信会有人看到的
I know this is gonna happen.
它真的是辆漂亮……
It really is a beauty...
我觉得你还是不要碰它的好
I'd prefer you don't touch it.
确实
You know what?
- 我就是经典的去它的 - 这就对了
- I am a classic, damn it.
- That's right.
发生在这辆卡车身上同样的事也会发生在我身上的
And the same thing that happened to
this truck is gonna happen to me.
没错
That's right.
对我得让他们看到我的真正价值
Yeah, I just have to get
them to see my real value.
是的
Bingo.
这辆车需要的是修整和新漆
I mean, all this truck needed was
some bodywork and some new paint...
对啊对啊嗯哼
Yeah, yeah. Uh-huh.
这也正是我所需要的
...and that's what I need.
是啊
Yeah.
- 那你现在要什么？ - 嗯
- What's that now?
- Yeah.
我要去做整容手术
I'm gonna get plastic surgery.
不我……我们……我们重头谈一次
No, I... Let's... Let's
reboot this conversation.
- 不用 - 有……听我说
- No.
- Here's... Look.
我们拿割草机来作例子吧
Let's use the lawn mower as an example.
- 矮油脏 - 不我需要翻新重塑
- Low, greasy, and dirty.
- No, I-I need to be restored.
这是唯一的办法能让我继续做我热爱的事情——教书
That is the only way I'm gonna
get to do what I love... teach.
- 不我不…… - 亲爱的亲爱的你真的是天才
- No, I don't...
- Honey... Honey, you really are a genius.
现在雨天我也不能带她出去了
（对着车子说的，原来雨天不能带车出去，现在……）
Now I won't be able to take
her out in the rain, either.
青蛙说“你把它弄进来的你要负责把它弄出去”
The frog said, "You get
it in, you pull it out."
嗨 Ed
Hey. Ed.
呃我可能需要找一位好的整形医师
Uh, I might need the service
of a good plastic surgeon.
那位医生是谁来着把你的第三任妻子弄得很像你的第二任？
Who's that doctor that made your third
wife look a lot like your second one?
你要弄张新脸 Baxter？
You getting a new face, Baxter?
我就能不再看这张脸了
'Cause I could use a break
from looking at this one.
这是Outdoor Man的脸
That's the face of Outdoor Man.
当人们看到这张脸就会想要买♥♥点什么去杀死些东西
When people see that face, they want
to buy stuff to kill something.
好吧谢谢你俩了
Well, thank you both.
其实不是我要
It's not for me, actually.
Vanessa要？
For Vanessa?
哦好吧恭喜你了
Oh, well, congratulations.
她想把它们增加到多大？
What's she bumping them up to?
知道吧我会在下次她一直说你多么多么优秀的时候
You know, I'm gonna tell her you said that
告诉她你说过什么的
next time she goes on and on
about what a classy guy you are.
怎么了 Baxter？
What's up, Baxter?
Vanessa不需要那种东西的
Vanessa doesn't need that kind of thing.
我知道
I know.
她听了些东西就根深蒂固地相信要是想重回♥教♥学工作
She's got it in her head that if she
wants to get back into teaching,
她就得翻新重塑
she needs to be restored.
翻新重塑？
Restored?
她从哪儿听来这疯话的？
Where'd she get that crazy idea?
你问倒我了
Beats me.
她每次应聘面试都输给了年轻人
Every interview she's been going on,
she's losing out to young people.
那样不对
That's not right.
她拥有那些年轻老师们所没有的东西
No, she's got something those