最后一人（2011）

Last Man Standing S06E03

Part 3 March 19, 2021, 1:01 p.m.

嗯那我应该试试了
Hm. I might have to give that a try.
是啊肯定是个明智的选择
Yeah, well, it's definitely the way to go.
我是说你肯定不想背那个负担的对吧
（猴子在背上）
I mean, you don't want
that monkey on your back.
是呀你是对的
You know what? You're right.
我要买♥♥一支那样的烟杆子去
I am gonna go buy one of those pens.
- 谢了
- 嗯
- Thanks.
- Yeah.
吸电子烟
Vape life.
(Sighs)
- OK
- 嘿 Mr. Alzate 你肯定会觉得自豪的
- Okay.
- Hey, Mr. Alzate, I think you'll be proud.
我给睡袋重新做了排列给十字弩做了记录
I set up that new line of sleeping bags,
还跟一个初中生说了句“你丫把裤子提起来”
reordered the crossbows, and told a
teenager to pull up his damn pants.
嗯有个比我老的人在身边真是很幸福呢
Well, it's nice to have
someone older than me around.
我真高兴你和我们一起度过间歇年而不是去欧洲闲逛
I'm glad you're spending your gap year
with us and not traipsing around Europe.
欧洲被过誉了
Well, Europe's overrated.
也不过就是各种教堂和一堆外国人
It's nothing but old
churches and foreigners.
- 嘿大家
- 嘿
- Hey. Hey, guys.
- Hey.
嘿 Ed 呃……你很富有的
Hey, Ed, uh... you're rich.
你有保险箱吗？
Do you have a safe?
我有保险箱
Yes, I do.
但是连了炸♥弹♥的所以别惦记了
But it's wired to explode,
so don't get any ideas.
我和Ryan在地下室发现了一个保险箱
Ryan and I found an old
safe in the basement,
可是我们不知道怎么打开
and we don't know how to get into it.
那你要么找个锁匠要么在悬崖边对准一只丛林狼把它扔下去
Well, you could either call a locksmith
or drop it off a cliff onto a coyote.
不别找锁匠
No, do not call a locksmith.
要是让个陌生人发现你的保险箱里满是宝贝
You don't want a total stranger finding out
你就开心不起来了
you may have a safe full
of valuables. No, no.
为什么不能告诉Ryan里面有只濒危动物（蝾螈）
Why can't you just tell Ryan there's
an endangered salamander in there
然后看着他纯手工刨开呢？
and watch him claw through it?
你需要一个懂锁的人
What you need is someone who knows locks.
来看好啊
Here, watch this.
- Kyle
- 你要干嘛？
- Kyle.
- What are you doing?
您叫我 Mr. Alzate？
Hey. You wanted me, Mr. Alzate?
是的我不小心又把我的钥匙锁办公室里了
Yes, I accidentally locked
my keys in the office again.
没问题先生
(Chuckles) No problem, sir.
介意我用一下吗？
Do you mind?
没问题
Sure.
你拿好
There you go.
搞定啦
There you go.
Kyle 我们店可是洗劫了一家赌场跑这儿来避难的军♥火♥专家开的
（不知道有没有避难的意思）
Kyle, we are one munitions expert
away from knocking over a casino.
这位年轻人可以搞定所有的锁
Young man can get past any lock.
我妈妈以前经常把我锁家门外
My mom used to lock me
out of the house a lot.
是的
Yeah.
真是好笑
- Hilarious.
- (Chuckles)
是的孩子我需要你破开一个保险箱
Yeah, son, I need you to crack a safe.
我懂的
I see.
我们又要回你前妻家一次？
Are we going back to your
ex-wife's house again?
我是说……去湖边小屋所谓何事事？
I mean, what deed to a lake house?
(Exhales sharply)
(Spritzes)
Ooh.
(Sniffs)
(Door closes)
Hey.
- Hi.
- Hi.
欢迎回家好的好的
Welcome home. Good, oh, yeah.
好的
Mm, okay.
所以你吸烟了
So, you're smoking.
我去
Damn it.
你怎么发现的？
How did you know?
你闻着就跟[洗涤剂]新出了一款……烧臭袜子味的一样
You smell like Febreze has a new scent...
burnt sock.
其实也没什么大不了的
You know what? It's... It's not a big deal.
那你跟Mandy说的那一堆话呢？
What about all that stuff you told Mandy?
所有那些科学不科学的东西听着好糟糕的样子
All that boring scientific stuff...
that sounded pretty bad.
我只是为了熬过这场罢♥工♥噩梦才吸烟的
I'm only smoking to help me get
through this strike nightmare.
吸烟不是解决问题的办法
Smoking is not a solution to a problem.
它带来一个新问题
It's a new problem.
我自己也不为吸烟感到开心
I'm not happy about it either.
但是感觉好像我就得那么做
It just feels like something I need to do.
你生命中总还有其他缓解压力的办法的呀
There's other ways you can
eliminate stress in your life.
你可以和你老公做床上运动呀
You can have sex with your husband.
运动完了我就会想要跟烟
Then I'd want a cigarette.
你倒是给我蛮高评价的
You give me a lot of credit.
Mike 你想要去解决问题了
Mike, you're trying to fix it.
你破坏我们的协定了
You're breaking the pact.
不不你都把清洁剂纸巾塞内衣里了
No, no, the pact is null
and void when you go crazy
你都变疯子了协定还有什么意义
like sticking a Febreze sheet in your bra.
- 听着我不是你的孩子
- 是吗？
- Look, I'm not your child.
- Really?
你不用告诉我我该做什么不该做什么
You don't get to tell me
what I can and can't do.
哦好就看着我说
Oh, yeah, just watch me.
你不能吸烟
You can't smoke.
哦？我们不谈了
Oh? We're done talking.
- 哦
- 我去后院了
- Oh.
- I'll be in the backyard.
(Laughter)
伙计们有时候你以为正享受着每天的开心一刻
Hey, guys, you know when you
have happy hour every day,
其实都会变成难过一刻的
it just turns into sad hour.
我应该叫上你的 Mike 但是一般你都会急忙赶着回家
I would've invited you, Mike, but
you're usually in a rush to go home.
今晚不急了
Not tonight.
Vanessa吸烟了
Vanessa is smoking.
我不想评论别人的妻子的但是既然你先提起了
I don't like to comment on other men's
wives, but since you opened the door...
是的她很热辣真的
Yeah, she's a hottie. Yeah.
我从没想过Vanessa也是个烟民
I would never peg Vanessa as a smoker.
是的她大概30年没吸过烟了
Yeah, she hasn't smoked a
cigarette in like 30 years,
但是这场教师罢♥工♥搞得她颠狂了
but this teachers' strike has
her like climbing the walls.
罢♥工♥把Carol也搞颠了
It's driving Carol crazy, too.
她又开始打跆拳道了
She started kickboxing again.
所以我才不想回家
That's why I'm staying late.
我不想她抽烟但是我能怎么办？
I hate her smoking, but what am I gonna do?
小时候我爸发现我在车♥库♥后面抽烟
Ugh, one day my dad caught
me smoking behind the garage.
(Chuckles)
千万别在耙子旁边惹你♥爸♥
Never piss off your dad near a rake.
我爸发现我以后逼我抽了2包
When my father caught me,
he made me smoke two packs
[长红] 一根接着一根不带喘气儿
of Pall Malls, one right after the other.
那真能管用？
Does that actually work?
就跟施魔法一样管用的
Like a charm, yeah.
我坚贞不渝地跟随了[长红]25年
I was a loyal Pall Mall
smoker for 25 years.
都是好主意其实
They're all good ideas, you know?
但是我觉得我们还没有制定一个比较好的策略
But I don't think we got
a working strategy yet.
又不是我们谁的孩子只是妻子而已呀
It's not like it's one of
his kids. It's his wife.
我……我理解给她个非A即B的选择题
I... I understand. Give her a clear choice.
戒烟或者分手
Stop smoking or we're through.
是啊一位要付四份前妻赡养费的家伙的技能
Great, from a guy who's
making four alimony payments.
当女人有难以解决的问题的时候你就意识到婚姻该终结了