喜当爷（2015）
Grandfathered
第一季
剧集 | 喜当爷（2015） | 导航列表
喜当爷（2015）
Grandfathered S01E20
Part 2
Sept. 7, 2020, 11:39 a.m.
'cause I'm never gonna have a son, right?
一旦我们提交了我们的应用
Okay, once we send in our application,
如果通过了 Coparent Pro将会在
if it's approved, CoParentPro will be
应用商店上线
available on the App Store.
啊 我们就会像Shazam(音乐匹配软件)一样大火!
Ah, we're gonna be like Shazam!
- 如果上帝仁慈 我们就会像Shazam一样 - 对的!
- Yeah, if God is good, we'll be like Shazam. - Yeah.
好的 现在只差点击发送了
All right, all I got to do is hit send.
我下不去手
I can't do it.
你来 来吧
You do it. Do it?
- 不行 我也下不了手 - 来吧
-Nah, I can't do it. - Do it.
- 直接上吧 - 我被邪气附身了
Just do it. - I have bad juju.
伊蒂 你来点
Edie, you do it.
点击发送
Press send.
来吧来吧
Ooh, let's do this.
- 啊 加油 - 啊 好了
-Ah, go for it. - Ah, okay.
已发送
Send.
- 啊 棒! - 啊 棒飞了!
- Ah, yes! - Ah, yay!
- 干得好 宝贝 - 天哪
- Good job, bobo. - Oh, man.
谁会想到我们三个会走到今天这步呢?
Who would've ever thought the three of us would end up here?
听着 我不应该告诉你这个的
Listen, I'm really not supposed to tell you this,
但是你可以在网上买♥♥一部一模一样的手♥机♥
but you can buy this exact phone on the Internet
比这里便宜五十块钱
for, like, 50 bucks less.
还免费送手♥机♥壳 所以呢
Comes with a free case, so
当然了 土豪请随意
I mean, do you what you want,
但别当冤大头
but don't be an idiot.
那个是我孩子的妈妈 瓦娜萨
My baby mama, Vanessa.
我们一起当电♥话♥销♥售♥
We were on the same cell phone
当了一年多了
sales force for over a year.
在一个命中注定的晚上
And then one fateful night,
我刚好遇到她心情沮丧
I caught her at her absolute lowest point.
没错
Yeah.
四个柠檬
Four hard lemonades
和一个破的有机套套
and one defective organic condom later,
然后 哇啦!
and booyah!
我就成了一个二十四岁的卖♥♥电♥话♥的
I'm a 24-year-old cell phone salesman
有着一个半古巴混血 长得一点都不像我的宝宝
with a half-Cuban baby that looks nothing like me.
简直是一个传统的童话故事
It's a tale as old as time.
当然 她说我们只是朋友
I mean, she says we're just friends
一起养着孩子 但我觉得
raising a kid together, but I think
我们都心知肚明吧?
we both know what that means, don't we?
我还是去商场买♥♥吧
I'll just go to the mall.
好的
All right.
嗨
Hey.
嗨 怎么了
Hey, what's up?
- 你饿了吗 - 并不
- Are you hungry? - Ah, nah.
我中餐刚吃了一个超大的三明治
I just had a huge sandwich for lunch.
和我手臂那么大 你真应该看看
It was like the size of my arm，you should've seen it!
噢 我很想看看那个三明治有多大
Oh, I would've loved to have seen that sandwich.
你今晚想和我一起吃饭吗?
You maybe want to eat dinner with me tonight?
好啊 你妈会照看伊蒂吗?
Sure. Will your mom watch Edie?
会的 会的 她打算待在家里
Yeah, yeah, she's just gonna stay in
约了一些她的朋友过来
and hang out with her friends.
噢 你是指那群奇怪的
Oh, you mean those weird
整天和她一起玩的离婚妇女?
divorced ladies she's always with?
是的
Yeah.
她们糟透了
They're the worst.
是啊
Yeah.
然后她答应和我吃晚餐了
And then she said she'd come.
我就知道 我就知道!
I knew it! I knew it!
谢谢你们
Thank you, guys.
看 这就是为什么你们是我最好的朋友
Man, see, this is why you're my best friends.
噢 宝贝 这太棒了
Oh, sweetie, this is so great.
我不是指说你把安娜 德布 玛莎
Not that you just called Anna, Deb and Marsha
当成你最好的朋友
your best friends, but the part
- 我是说瓦娜萨的事情! - 谢谢
- about Vanessa! - Thanks.
所以 今晚 有什么给我的建议吗?
So, any tips for tonight or...?
穿那件我织给你的橄榄绿高领毛衣
Wear the olive-green turtleneck I knit you.
让你的脖子成为一个性感的亮点
Let your neck be a sexy surprise for later.
对的 你穿那件衣服
Yes, you will look like Javier Bardem
- 看起来像哈维尔·巴登 - 真的吗
- in that turtleneck! - Yeah, really?
- 噢 当然 - 你应该留个刘海
- Oh, absolutely, yeah. - You should grow bangs.
你知道吗 有时候我觉得
You know, sometimes I wonder like,
我应该交一些同龄的
maybe I should have some friends my own age
同性朋友给我撩妹意见
and gender giving me dating advice,
或者像是真的男性形象
or like a real male influence.
然后你们给我那个
Then you guys hit me with that
巴登高领毛衣的建议
Bardem turtleneck rec
让我意识到有你们就够了
and I realized I'm right where I'm supposed to be.
谢谢你们
Thanks, guys.
团结就是力量啊 女士们
It takes a village, ladies. Mm-hmm.
团结就是力量
Takes a village.
安丽诗 这个桌子这么摆看起来可以吗
Annelise, Does this table look okay?
我说 那些叉子有没有摆歪
I mean, are the forks crooked?
我只是觉得...
I just...
你觉得这些蜡烛是苔绿色的吗
And would you describe these candles as moss green?
因为他的眼睛是苔绿色的 又很明显这..
Because his eyes are moss green, and obviously...
凯瑟琳 我见你对着五千个人做过TED演讲
Catherine, I saw you give a TED Talk to 5,000 people.
你完全搞得定这蜡烛的事情
This candle business is beneath you.
我知道 我只是 我真的很想把今晚做完美
I know, I just... I really want tonight to be perfect.
我可以告诉你一个很蠢的事情吗?
Can I tell you something stupid?
如果你坚持要说的话 实话说
If you must, but, to be honest, my days are filled
我每天都在听一些很蠢的事情
with hearing stupid things,
我希望以你的思想高度不会...
and I was hoping a woman of your stature would...
我真的很喜欢吉米
I am so into Jimmy.
- 呃 糟糕 - 不 实际上
- Ah, damn it. - No, check that.
我不仅是喜欢他
I am more than into him.
我... 我爱...
I... am falling in...
打住 打住 打住 在你讲出来之前
Whoa, whoa, whoa, before you complete that sentence,
你可能需要冷静缓一缓
you might want to pump the brakes a few times.
我不需要 每当有关于男人的问题 我总是缓
I don't. When it comes to men, I always pump the brakes.
我就是这样: 我管理一个五百强企业
That's what I do: I run a Fortune 500 company,
我买♥♥游艇 我总是不断地停下来 缓一缓
I buy yachts, and I pump, pump, pump those damn brakes.
"游艇" 复数? 很多艘游艇?
"Yachts" With an S? Like, multiple yachts?
今晚 我要喝酒 鼓起勇气
Tonight, I am gonna gather up some liquid courage,
敬酒
make a toast,
告诉他我爱他
and tell him that I love him.
我居然买♥♥过你的书
I cannot believe I bought your book.
听着 无论发生什么 我能向你保证:
Look, no-no matter what happens, I can promise you one thing:
这次派对肯定比去年好
this party will be better than last year's.
当今情景喜剧的问题所在
The problem with sitcoms nowadays
是那些父亲太丑了
is that the dads are so ugly.
谁想要我的吻?
Who wants a kiss?
这才是个派对
Now this, this is a party.
有气球 伏特加 艾伦·锡克
You got balloons, you got a vodka luge, Alan Thicke...
艾伦·锡克怎么进来的?
How'd Alan Thicke get in?
爸 你来了!
Dad, you made it!
- 怎么样? - 这餐厅?
- What do you think? - This the restaurant?
对 我的宝贝
Yeah, it's my baby.
有些窗户会更好
A few windows might be nice.
不过 现在的孩子都喜欢这种昏暗的氛围
But I guess the kids all like it dim nowadays.
这些人是谁?
Who are all these people?
只是我的一部分亲密好友
Oh, just 75 of my closest friends.
这些20岁女孩
All these 20- year-old girls,
也是你的亲密好友?
these... these are your closest friends?
对啊 怎么样?
Yeah, what do you think?
来 你得试试这个
Oh, here. Here, try this.
意大利蒜酱肉球 我们都喜欢的
Meatball marinara, like we like.
怎么样?
How is it?
你没遗传到你母亲的手艺
You didn't get your mother's sauce,
- 但你遗传到她的腿 - 你说得对
- but you got her legs. - Uh, you're right.
这酱汁有问题
喜当爷（2015）
Grandfathered
剧集 | 喜当爷（2015） | 导航列表