好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S12E07
Part 4
Nov. 18, 2020, 5:09 p.m.
Well, he's still asleep
他还睡着
and he feels cooler,
烧有点退了
but now I'm worried that he might have hypothermia.
现在我开始担心是不是低体温症
Yeah.
是啊
You know, one of the hardest lessons I've had to learn as a parent
父母经里最难学到的一课就是
is sometimes you just gotta relax.
有些时候你得放轻松
Relax?
放轻松
All I do is worry.
我只会担心
And now that I don't sleep,
现在我又没得睡
I have plenty of time to do it.
所以大把的时间可以担心
Is he exercising enough?
他运动量够不够
Is he eating right? Does he even want to stay here?
吃得好不好 甚至担心他想不想留在这里
I mean, this is the most terrifying thing I've ever done.
这是我做过最让我心慌的事了
And-- this is scarier than when I bought the big iPhone
这比我买♥♥"比大更大"的苹果手♥机♥
and I didn't know if it would fit in my pocket.
担心塞不进裤袋更可怕
You think you're scared?
你觉得你这叫害怕吗
I have a daughter.
我家的可是女儿
I worry about all the same things you do,
你担心的所有事我都担心
plus penises.
还得担心全天下的鸡鸡
And with you,
至于你
you have to worry about animated penises.
你还得担心动画鸡鸡
I should have never told you that.
我就不应该告诉你
You should never tell anyone that.
你就不应该告诉任何人
All right, all right. What-what's your next date?
好了 你下个约会对象会是什么样
Shrek?
怪物史莱克
No, no, no. The-the genie from Aladdin.
不不不 阿♥拉♥丁神灯里的精灵
Or-or maybe you'll have a three-way with the Hakuna Matata guys?
再不然是和丁丁彭满来个3P
Shut up.
闭嘴
Make me.
等你来闭
I could make you.
我可以让你闭嘴
Oh, yeah?
是吗
I'm right here.
我就在这
I'm so sorry. What? Why?
对不起 什么 为什么
You're married.
你已婚了
To a man. Oh...
还是和男人
That. Uh...
那个...
I should go.
我该走了
No, no, no, no. No, no, wait, wait, wait, wait.
不 别走 等等 等一下
Here's... okay, the thing about my marriage is...
这个...好吧 我结婚是...
I'm not gay.
我不是同性恋
Does Alan know?
艾伦知道吗
His brain knows,
他理智知道
but his heart may not.
但感情上可能不知道
Here-here-here, here's the thing. Here's the thing: .
是这样...事情是这样的
Alan is...he's my best friend, okay?
艾伦他是我最好的朋友
And-and he married me as a favor
他是为了帮我才和我结婚的
so it would be easier to adopt Louis.
这样领养路易斯会简单点
Well, I mean... the fact that you
其实你为了领养路易斯
married your best friend
和你最好的朋友结婚
so that you could adopt Louis is..
这事还真挺...
actually very sweet.
挺感人的
So...
那么...
...you're not mad at me?
你没有生气吗
Hakuna matata.
哈库拉马塔塔[彭彭与丁满欢乐歌♥曲]
That's my philosophy.
这是我的人生哲学
So...
那么...
...can we kiss again? Yeah.
我们可以继续亲了吗 好
It's been so long since I've kissed a man.
我好久没有亲男人了
I wish I could say the same thing.
真希望我也可以这么说
Julie, your boobs look great in that blouse.
朱莉 这件衣服显得你的胸好赞哦
I am so jealous.
人家好嫉妒
Thanks to my kids,
托孩子们的福
mine went from 34B to 34 "Used to be."
我的34B变成了"曾经拥有"
I like your boobs.
我挺喜欢你的胸啊
I don't know.
不知道
What do you think, Alan,
你觉得呢 艾伦
should I get 'em done?
我用去隆乳吗
Oh, well, I'm no expert.
我又不是专家
I-I think they're lovely.
我觉得你的胸很美
Are you sure?
真的吗
Oh, my! You just did that.
老天 你真豪放
Um, you guys, I-I think there's something I should tell you...
亲们 有件事我得跟你们说...
He has nothing to compare them with.
他得有个对比才好评论
Here.
看
You guys are my best friends.
你们就是我最好的朋友
Okay, okay.
等等
I-I know you haven't done this in a while,
我知道你很久没有做了
so I don't want to go too fast,
所以我不想 操之过急
but do you want to go up to my...
但你愿不愿意跟我上楼...
Let's go.
走
Walden?
沃顿
Can you come here?
你能过来吗
He didn't say "Over," so it doesn't count.
他没有说"完毕" 所以不算数
Oh, go check on him.
去看看他吧
It's fine.
没事
I've waited for two years, I can wait a little bit longer.
我都等两年了 不在乎多等一会儿
Thank you.
谢谢
Oh. Don't start without me.
别不等我就自己"开始"
Or do.
开始也可以
Oh, uh, by the way, if you want to stay in the mood,
顺便说一下 如果你想保持"性"致高昂
we get all the cartoon channels.
我们家有所有的卡♥通♥台
Walden?
沃顿
Parenting rule number four:
家长准则第四条
Sleep is better than sex.
睡觉比上♥床♥好
This is the best night of my life.
这是我这辈子最开心的晚上
I love you girls.
我爱你们 姑娘们
We should get matching tattoos.
我们应该纹姐妹纹身去
I have a better idea.
我有个更好的主意
Let's go to a strip club!
我们去脱衣舞吧
That is better!
的确更好
This was a great idea.
这真是个好主意
That is definitely bigger than fun size.
绝对大过童趣版
Make it rain!
撒钱啊
Yeah, give him some money!
给他钱
Oh, this just keeps getting better.
真是越来越"好"了
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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