迈克和茉莉（2010）

Mike & Molly S04E16

Part 1 Dec. 15, 2020, 2:59 p.m.

Your suitcase feels light.
你的行李箱很轻嘛
Well, I need the space. It's a nice hotel,
我要节省空间那可是个好酒店
and I plan on taking everything that's not nailed down.
只要不是钉起来的东西老娘都打算顺手牵羊
You can't tell me you're gonna steal. I'm a cop.
别告诉我你要行窃我可是警♥察♥
So you don't want me to swipe you a robe?
这么说你不准备要件睡袍咯
Absolutely not.
绝对不想要
Or slippers, if they're the big, fluffy kind I like.
也别给我拿我喜欢的那种毛茸茸的大拖鞋
You girls enjoy yourselves at the casino.
姑娘们上赌场可要好好玩玩
And when you get there, put this on 29 black.
到那了就把这压29号♥黑
Odds are 35 to one.
赔率是35比1
If it hits, it'll be $700.
如果压中了 700块唾手可得
With those winnings, put $100
用这些赢来的钱
on each of the following numbers:
在这些数字上各压一百
Eight, 13, 20, 28, 29 and 30.
8 13 20 28 29 还有30
Now, if one of those hits, that's $3,500.
随便中一个那就是3500块
Put $2,600 in your pocket, then bet $200 on each of the numbers.
2600塞口袋里在每个数字上各压200块
When that hits, it'll be seven grand.
要是中的话那就7000块到手
At that point, call me for step two.
到时候电♥话♥联♥系♥我商讨下一步计划
Did you get all that?
你听明白了么
28, 29, 30.
28 29 30
Yeah, pretty simple.
嗯挺简单的
All right, your bag is in the trunk.
好了你的包放车上了
Call me when you get to the hotel.
到酒店给我来电♥话♥
Remember, no open containers in the car.
记住在车上不准喝酒
Tell your mom I smelled the wine in her travel mug.
跟你老妈说我闻到她的旅行杯里有酒味
All right?
听见没
She's got to down it or dump it.
她要么一口喝掉要么倒掉
She filled that up like five minutes ago.
她五分钟前才满上
That thing's bone-dry.
她需要酒精的滋润
I wish you were going.
我真希望你也来
No, you don't. I really don't. Is that bad?
不你才不想我来呢我真的不想我是不是很邪恶
No. You're having a girls' weekend,
才不呢你有你的女人周末
I'm having a boys' weekend.
我有我的男人周末
You're gonna get spa treatments
你做你的水疗
and I'm not gonna shower for two days. Everybody wins.
我这两天都可以不洗澡双赢啊
All right, Joyce, I love you.
好了 Joyce 我爱你
Have fun and be safe.
注意安全好好玩
Take your pick. I can't do both.
你选一个吧我没办法两全其美
Be safe.
那注意安全
And don't forget.
还有别忘了
Eight, 13, 20, 28, 29 and 30.
8 13 20 28 29 还有30
Unless the dealer has an anchor tattoo.
如果庄家有个船锚的纹身
Then tell Roy "Hi" And put everything on black.
就替我跟Roy问声好然后把所有钱都压黑色上
Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho. This is great.
哦吼呵呵太舒服了
I haven't had a bed to myself
自我染上流感的那个神奇周末后
since that magical weekend when I had the flu.
我就没一个人独享一张床了
Sleeping with Vince is no picnic, either.
和Vince一块睡也是很艰难啊
Night sweats, salami breath.
盗汗香肠味的口臭
And in the morning, it ain't Mr. Bluebird pecking on my shoulder.
大清早的在我肩上啄来啄去的可不是知更鸟
Well, we only got two beds, so someone is sleeping with somebody.
我们只有两张床总得有两个人合睡一张
All right, pick a number between one and ten.
好了从一到十挑一个数字
Five.
五
Oh. No.
哦不是
Guys, we did not come here to sleep.
我们来这儿可不是为了睡觉的
We are in Indiana.
我们可是在印第安纳
By the time we leave, they're gonna call it Sindiana.
等我们走的时候别人就得管这叫印第欢纳了
Come on, Mol, let's go down to the casino.
快点 Mol 一块上赌场去
Nope. The only thing I'm gambling on is whether or not
不去了我唯一要赌的就是按♥摩♥师
my masseuse notices that my coupon's expired.
会不会发现我的优♥惠♥券过期了
All right, then, enjoy your massage.
好吧那好好享受你的按♥摩♥吧
And remember, if their hand slips, it's not cheating.
记住如果他们的手往下滑了这可不算搞外遇
This is living, huh?
这才是生活哈
Eat what you want, watch what you want,
想吃什么就吃什么爱看什么就看什么
no ladies telling you to put your drink on a coaster.
没有女人叫你把饮料放杯垫上
You told me to put my drink on a coaster.
那你还叫我把我饮料放杯垫上
'Cause your glass sweats more than you do.
谁叫杯上的水滴比你出的汗还多
All right, we got pork chops, hamburgers, ribs and sausage.
我们有猪排汉堡排骨还有香肠
Everything is on a bone or a bun.
不是带骨头的就是带面包的
No utensils needed.
不附餐具手抓自取
And if you got a shirt, you have a napkin.
只要你有衬衫就不用拿餐巾了
Let the games begin.
开始狂欢吧
Uh, da, da, da, da, da.
呃哒哒哒哒哒
You forgetting something?
你忘了什么
Oh, the mustard. Yeah, I don't do that anymore.
哦是芥末我不加那玩意了
I-I think my palate's evolving.
我觉得我的味觉进化了
Uh, da, da.
呃哒哒
We got the department fitness test coming up.
局里就要体能测试了
That's next week.
那是下周的事
This is today.
这个是今天的事
Back off.
一边去
Uh, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba.
呃哒哒哒哒哒
You think that sausage is gonna leave your system by next week?
你以为下周前你就能把这香肠排掉吗
Are you kidding? I haven't eaten anything this greasy in months.
你开什么玩笑我一个月没吃这么油腻的东西了
This will be out of my system in an hour.
这个不出一小时老子就能排出去
Uh, da, da.
呃哒哒
Have you done anything to prepare for this? Yeah.
你为这个做准备了吗当然啊
I marinated these sausages all night.
我可是把香肠腌了一晚上
Man, I'm talking about the fitness test.
我说的是体能测试
You're chewing your way to failure.
你把自己嚼上一条不归路啊
What's he got to do, touch his toes?
他要做什么摸自个脚趾头吗
'Cause I think that ship has sailed.
我看为时已晚
No, he-he'got to run a mile in 13 minutes,
才不是他要在十三分钟内跑一英里
he's got to bench 60% of his body weight...
他要卧推起体重的六成
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
喔喔喔喔
stop right there.
先打住
I don't think Lou Ferrigno could bench 60% of that.
我觉得Lou Ferrigno都举不起那堆的六成
40 bucks says Mike can't do it.
40块赌Mike做不到
I'll take some of that action.
我来和你赌
I've seen him pick up and shake a vending machine
我亲眼看见他举起自动售货机摇
to dislodge a stuck bag of chips.
就为了取出一包被卡住的薯片
Yeah, but that's adrenaline.
是啊不过那是肾上腺素作用
Like a mom lifting a car off her baby.
就像救子心切的母亲把车抬起来
I'll take a lick of that lollipop.
让我也小添一笔
You'll take a lick off anything.
你丫什么都要舔一口
Shut him up.
堵住他的嘴
I will shut you all up.
我要堵住你们所有人的嘴
I got a weight bench in the basement.
地下室有个举重床
Here, hold my plate.
来拿着我的盘子
Smart move.
明智之举
Seven out.
七点
Damn it.
他妈的
Should have given the dice a little lucky blow.
早知道就吹下骰子求点好运
Should've given one to the dealer.
应该去吹庄家才是
Hey. Hey.
嘿嘿
How was your massage?
按♥摩♥怎么样啊
Great. I got the shiatsu'd out of me.
好极了被指压得都不是我了
Well, we're getting worked over pretty good here, too.
刚好我们这里正渐入佳境
New shooter.
新掷手
We got one, right here. What, me?
我们这有在这什么我啊
No, I've never played before.
不了我没玩过这个
I know.
我知道
Hey. I got a virgin shooter here.
嘿这有个处♥女♥掷手
Yes.
太好了
I give you my firstborn.
我把我的长女都给您了
And you, give me a $5 "Yo" Coming out.
还有五美元押11点
Anyway, I should be pretty good at this.
好吧我应该会玩得不错的
Like Yahtzee with less dice, huh?
不就是比快艇骰子少几个骰子嘛
Yo, 11, winner.
11点赢
Thank you. What just happened?
谢谢发生什么了
You won. Oh.
你赢了噢