迈克和茉莉（2010）

Mike & Molly S05E01

Part 1 Dec. 15, 2020, 4:34 p.m.

Previously on Mike & Molly...
前情提要
Oh, I got in.
呀我被录了
Well, what is going on with you?
你发什么疯啊
The Iowa Writers Workshop.
爱荷华作家工作坊
I've been accepted into their summer writing program.
我被他们的夏季写作计划录取啦
Wait a minute.
慢着
Are you actually good at this writing thing?
你还真擅长写作啊
I'll be living my dream in Iowa for eight weeks.
我将有八周时间圆梦爱荷华
How are you gonna ruin that, Peggy?
看你还怎么扫我的兴 Peggy
Eight weeks?
八个星期吗
Does Mike know about all this?
你和Mike说了吗
Damn it, you always find a way.
靠你还真有一套
I have some exciting news.
我有好消息要宣布
More for her than you.
她的好消息不是你的
Shh!
嘘
What is going on?
怎么了
I've been accepted into one of the most prestigious
我被全国数一数二的
writing programs in the country.
写作计划录取了
Honey, that's great!
亲爱的太棒了
In Iowa.
在爱荷华哈
It's an opportunity of a lifetime.
这是千载难逢的机会啊
Well, I'm sure it is.
确实如此
I can't believe you did this whole deal
难以置信这么重要的事情
without even talking to me about it.
你竟然都不跟我商量
Well, we're talking about it now.
我这不就在和你商量嘛
No, you're telling me.
这不是商量是告诉
Talking about it would be,
商量的话你该问我
"Honey, I'm thinking about applying
"亲爱的我想申请一个
"For an out-of-state workshop for a couple months.
"州外的写作班学习几个月
You okay with that?"
可以吗"
Are you okay with that?
可以吗
Why didn't you tell me?
你怎么就不告诉我呢
Just figured I was never gonna get in.
我觉得自己不会被录取
I was too embarrassed to even talk about it.
我都不好意思和你说
Lady, you have no idea
小姐你不知道
how great you are.
自己有多棒
Smart and talented.
又聪明又有才华
Huh? And you can do anything that you set that mind to.
只有你想做的没有做不成的
Thank you.
谢谢你
I'm sorry I'm leaving you here with the lunatics.
对不起啊把你留在这疯子堆儿里
The Taser's working, right?
你的电击枪还能用是吧
Yeah.
好用
How long has Fido been waiting for his master?
乐乐等他主人多久了
About an hour.
快一小时了
Ever since Molly called from Naperville
自从Molly在Naperville加油时
when she stopped for gas.
打来电♥话♥后
He got so excited, I'm surprised he hasn't piddled.
他超兴奋我蛮意外他没高兴得尿出来
What's that, boy?
什么情况宝贝儿
You hear something?
你听见什么了吗
Leave him alone.
别管他
This is the first time I've seen him
Molly走了之后
on his hind legs since she left.
第一次见他这么精神
Poor thing.
可怜的娃子
He's been real sad without Molly. Mm.
Molly不在他一直郁郁寡欢
Celibacy will do that to a man.
男人禁欲就会这个样子
That's why monks are so quiet.
这就是为什么和尚总是那么安静
If you're not getting any, what's there to talk about?
如果你捞不到什么还有啥可谈的
He must have been a mute before he met Molly.
那在遇到Molly前他一定是个哑巴
Oh, there were girls.
还是有过女人的
I mean, he'd lose a few pounds, get his heart broken,
Mike掉了肉伤了心
then come crawling back into the arms of his best gal.
然后乖乖回到他最可靠的女人怀中
The fact that his fridge isn't full
他冰箱里没装满女人头颅
of women's heads is a miracle.
也真是个奇迹了
She's here! She's here!
她到啦她到了
There she is!
可算回来了
Oh, my God, I missed you all so much!
天哪真是想死你们了
Oh, not as much as I missed you,
绝对我想你更多
because I have been here with them.
因为我和他们共处一室
All right,
行了
leave some for the rest of us.
也让我们腻歪一下
I missed this face.
想死这张小脸蛋啦
It felt like you were gone for months.
我感觉已经有几个月没见着你了
Yeah, I... I actually was.
我确实离家几个月了
Oh, come here. Come here.
来来抱一个
Clear the way.
闪开闪开
Step-papa coming through.
后爹大人要来啦
All right, all right.
好好好
How great does this feel? I ain't never letting go.
感觉很棒吧我再也不会放手了
All right, let go.
行了放手吧
Okay.
好吧
Peggy.
Peggy
You look tired.
你看上去很憔悴
It's weird, but I actually missed that.
说来奇怪我还蛮怀念你这扫兴劲儿的
Come on, sit down,
来来这边坐
we want to hear all about the writing program.
给我们讲讲写作计划的事吧
All right, well, it was a doozy.
好啊课程很赞
Well, for eight intense weeks, I was surrounded
在这高♥强♥度的八周里
by brilliant novelists and poets and playwrights.
我身边都是很厉害的小说家诗人和剧作家
It sounds wonderful.
很棒啊
No, it was awful.
不是很糟
They hated my writing.
他们不喜欢我写的东西
Oh, honey, I'm sorry. No, don't be.
啊真遗憾没什么
The more they hated it, the more it drove me.
他们越是不喜欢越能激励我
I dug deep, I found my voice.
经过深入挖掘我找到了属于自己的声音
I bet you have a beautiful voice.
你的声音一定很动听
No. Turns out my voice has the mouth of a sailor.
错了我的声音就像出自水手之口
Dirty?
很脏吗
Filthy.
很黄
I know I've written some racy short stories in the past,
我以前也写过一些黄段子
but this new stuff takes the cake.
不过现在写的才够味
Actually, in the second chapter, I wrote this thing with cake.
第二章我确实在黄段子中加了蛋糕的情节
It's disgusting.
恶心死了
She gets it from me.
她这点随我
You know, you never think they're listening,
你觉得他们不上心
but they're little sponges.
其实一点就通
You know, I mean, it started out so innocently enough.
我写的故事刚开始可纯洁了
You know, just kind of a romantic little story
就浪漫爱情什么的
about two lonely people who meet in Chicago, and...
孤男和寡女在芝加哥相遇然后
Aw, that's us.
这不就我们嘛
Oh, God, no.
才不是呢
No? No!
不是么当然不是了
No, we are nothing like these animals.
我们一点都不像那两禽兽
No morals, no boundaries.
没节操没底线
Just two people who are willing to stop at nothing
两个人为满足肉♥欲♥
until they satisfy their carnal desires.
肆无忌惮无所不为
Ooh, that's a spicy blurb.
喔真是火♥辣♥劲爆的简介啊
Well, you know what? That's what the publisher said
你晓得不出版商买♥♥我版权的时候
when he bought my book!
也这么说的
The school... the school sent out samples,
学校寄出了很多作品样本
and out of the piles of pretentious fire,
在一簇簇自命不凡的火焰中
my hot, throbbing phoenix rose!
我这美艳动人的凤♥凰♥ 脱颖而出了
You sold a book! I sold a book!
你卖♥♥出书了我卖♥♥出书了
Son of a bitch!
妈蛋啊
Ooh!
噢
That was worth the wait.
皇天不负苦心人呐
So, uh...
是啊呃
can I see it again?
能让我再瞅瞅不
I already showed it to you.
刚刚不是给你看过了嘛
Come on. I like looking at it.
别这样嘛我喜欢看着它
God, you're insatiable.
天啊你真是得寸进尺