十三号仓库（2009）

Warehouse 13 S02E13

Part 1 Dec. 17, 2021, 12:18 p.m.

13号♥仓库圣诞特集
很久很久以前
在南达科他州
很久很久以前
A long time ago,
在一个非常遥远的星系里
in a galaxy far far away...
你在说什么
What are you talking about?
这是《星球大战》的开头
Well, that's from the beginning of the "Star Wars".
这个是讲圣诞节的跟太空无关
This is-this is a show about Christmas. It's not about space.
太空中也庆祝圣诞节嘛
They have Christmas in space.
太冷了
That's cold!
为什么不能把仓库建在毛伊岛那种地方
Why couldn't they just put the warehouse in, like Maui.
毛伊岛夏威夷群岛中第二大岛
什么我喜欢冬天
Really? Because I love the winter
喜欢坐雪橇喜欢打雪仗
I love snowmobiling and snowball fights and oh...
还有热苹果酒
and hot apple cider.
是啊因为你是从落基山那种地方来的
Yes, because you're from like the Rockies.
那里根本没空气你的脑子不正常
There's no air up there. Your brain--not normal.
什么对着大提顿傻笑的人竟然会说这种话
Really? This from a man who giggles at Grand Tetons.
大提顿山脉位于美国怀俄明州
你知道这在法语里是什么意思吧
You know what that means in French, don't you?
Teton法语意为"波波" 大提顿则为"大♥波♥波"
进衣服里了
It's down my back!
行啊真好玩啊
Oh, who's-- okay, very funny.
现在是谁那么幼稚
Who's the child now?
要知道这附近可是有炸♥弹♥的
There's bombs around here, you know.
你差点把我的鼓膜震碎了
You could damage my tympanic membrane.
这只是沿着弧线甚至不是
It had, like, an arc. It wasn't even a--
太棒了
Okay, now this is awesome!
叮当叮当
Jingle, jingle!
棉花糖太棒了
Marshmallow! Good job!
这个藏物是"瑞士小姐的机会"
Artifacty "Swiss-Miss-hap."
美味杯中暴风雪
Tasty blizzard in a cup!
克劳迪娅这些闪闪发光的怎么回事
Hey, Claude, so what's with the twinkle lights?
上帝保佑我们每个人
God bless us, everyone.
在这边的角落里重达两百磅的家伙
And in this corner, weighing in at a hulking 200 pounds,
便是约书亚·多诺万正在挂上
would be Joshua Donovan, hanging the gloves
拳王阿里在"丛林之战"中大显神威的手套
that Ali wore against foreman in the rumble in the jungle.
-你好约什 -你好
- Hey, Josh. - Hey.
那些能干什么
All right, so what do those do?
能让你看见星星又不会伤到你
Oh, they make you see stars without hitting you.
麦卡那是原始榭寄生
Myka! That's the original mistletoe.
很有威力的哦
It is rather strong.
圣诞习俗凡女子站在槲寄生下任何人都可亲吻她
大♥波♥波
Tetons.
这个必须拿下来
That has to come down.
我来吧
I will get that.
同志们这是我第一次真正地
So guys, this is the first time in ever I actually have
跟生命中的朋友一起过节
people in my life to spend the holidays with.
我想我们可以围坐一圈吃点费格布丁
Figured we'd circle the yule log and eat figgy pudding.
太不巧了
It's awkward.
怎么了
What? Why?
我和皮特要回家过圣诞
Pete and I are going home for Christmas.
真对不起克劳迪娅
Sorry, Claude.
好吧我想没什么关系
Well, I guess it's all right.
我和约书亚跟阿迪爷爷一起过节好了
Joshua and I will just hang with Artie Claus.
你们在我办公室捣鼓什么
What have you done to my office?
我有件很特别的东西要给你
I got you something very special,
我觉得你会喜欢的
and I think you're gonna love it.
给我♥干♥什么
Why?
送你礼物呀
It's called a present.
你知道礼物这回事吧
You're familiar with presents, right?
咱们地球人会交换礼物
We earthlings exchange them
来表达情感和谢意
as a sign of affection and gratitude.
不谢谢但是我不要
No, no. Thank you, but no thank you.
-阿迪这是礼物 -收下吧
- Artie, it's a gift. - Take it.
就是阿迪
Yeah, come on, Artie.
好了别再嬉嬉闹闹了好吧
All right, look, could we just stop all this merriment?
拜托这里有些藏物非常危险
Come on, some of these are dangerous arti--artif--
这里可不是什么沃尔沃思的节日柜台
This is not the holiday counter at Woolworth's!
天哪
Oh, my--
懂我的意思了吗
You see what I mean?
全都给我取下来
Take it all down!
加利福尼亚州洛杉矶
爸爸我差点忘了告诉你
Oh, and dad, I almost forgot to tell you!
今天学校里来了个神秘圣诞老人
Today at school, we had a secret Santa,
有个叫马修的男孩送了我个手♥机♥套
and this boy, Matthew, he got me a phone case.
他跟我都没说过话
He's never even said hi to me,
可他竟然知道我最喜欢的颜色
but he knew my favorite color,
看来我得对他另眼相看了
so I might have to give him a second look.
听上去很不错
That sounds awesome.
爸爸你又在工作啦
Dad, you're working again.
是的对不起宝贝
Oh, um, yeah. Sorry, honey.
你太没礼貌了
That's rude, you know.
我现在专心跟你讲话好了吧
I'm all yours now, okay?
妈妈说得对女人讲话时你从来不听
Mom's right, you don't listen when women talk.
啊呀你什么时候变成女人了
Oh, yikes. When did you turn into a woman?
我就快十岁了
Well, I'm almost at the decade mark.
十年的人生经历可丰富啦
That's a lot of life experience, you know.
是我想你是对的
Yes. I guess you're right.
我得跟上你的节奏
I'm gonna have to keep up.
你为什么没来装饰圣诞树啊
Hey, why didn't you make the tree trimming?
妈妈说你保证过的
Mom said you promised.
有时候妈妈会捏造一些事情
Well, sometimes mom makes things up
因为她生我的气不过
because she's mad at me, but, I mean,
她知道我这周抽不开身
she knew I couldn't make it this week.
我的新商场有一堆事
I'm up against all these deadlines
马上就要到截止日了宝贝
at the new mall, honey.
真对不起孩子对不起
I--I--I'm sorry, kiddo. I'm sorry.
没事
It's okay.
你跟这个叫马修的男孩说
Now, you tell this boy Matthew
你老爸有枪呢
that your daddy's got a shotgun, okay?
告诉他我想快点见见他
And I will be wanting to meet him soon.
老爸你敢
Oh, dad, don't you dare!
看到吧我一直都有在听你讲
See? I was listening the whole time.
我爱你亲爱的
I love you, sweetheart.
我也爱你爸爸
Love you too, dad.
谁在那
Somebody there?
怎么怎么怎么搞的
What--what--what-- what the hell?
你你是什么东西
What are you-- what are you--
别别别别别
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!
别这样住手
No! Please, stop!
别别别
No, no, no!
不听话
不听话
可是科罗拉多斯普林斯市有盛大的灯展
Oh, but Colorado Springs has this great light show.
北坎顿有专业的足球名人堂
Ah, North Canton has the pro football hall of fame,
还有胡佛吸尘器
the hoover vacuum cleaner.
-那根本就不是 -取消航♥班♥吧
- That's not even-- - Cancel your flights.
-休假一律没有了 -什么
- All trips are off. - What?
阿迪你在开玩笑吗
Artie, are you kidding me?
阿迪这是圣诞节啊
Artie, it's Christmas.
有个案子
We've got a case.
你确定这案子归我们管吗
Well, are you sure that it's one of ours?
咱们来看看入室案件
Well, let's see. Home invasion.
受害者很不情愿地报告说
The victim reported-- reluctantly--
那个入侵者他的原话是
that the intruder, and I quote,
"在房♥间里绕圈飞行留下烟雾"
"Flew around the room in a cloud of light,
"然后顺着烟囱消失不见了"
then disappeared up the chimney."
这是警方的素描
And this is the police sketch.
不是吧
No.
你还真是在开玩笑
You have got to be kidding.
可怜的阿迪
Poor Artie.
累死累活连假期都不能放松一下
Must be exhausting to be that grouchy
肯定一肚子不高兴
without even time off for the holidays.
你觉得他小时候也是这样吗
You think he was like that as a kid?