生活大爆炸
The Big Bang Theory S09E11
Part 2
Oct. 5, 2019, 10:10 a.m.
Wow. You can really arrange that?
机会嘛 可能有也可能没有
Well, I said a chance, you know.
你跟连锁餐厅说今天是自己生日
When you tell them it's your birthday at Bennigan's,
他们也会大开方便之门
they make a fuss.
我觉得洛杉矶爱乐管弦乐团也会这样吧
I don't see why the Philharmonic would be any different.
不如来点实际的
How about something a little more realistic?
艾米喜欢自己织毛衣
Well, Amy enjoys knitting her own sweaters,
我在想自掏腰包赞助她去参加
so I was thinking of getting her an all-expense-paid trip
威斯康辛州羊及羊毛节
to the Wisconsin Sheep and Wool Festival.
抱歉 我刚才在等你说"逗你玩"
Sorry. I was waiting for the bazinga.
等等 那也可以很浪漫啊
Hold on. It could be romantic.
他们俩一起远离尘嚣
The two of them away together,
在白雪皑皑的威斯康辛州相互取暖
keeping each other warm in snowy Wisconsin.
不不不 她自己去而已
No, no, no, no. She'd be going alone.
如果你们觉得我很怕鸟
Well, if you think I'm afraid of birds,
那真该看看我遇到羊会怎么样
you should see me around sheep.
好吧 第三个选项是什么
Okay, well, what's the third option?
我跟她交♥媾♥
That I have coitus with her.
你们觉得把谢尔顿的票给斯尔图特怎么样
What do you think about giving Sheldon's ticket to Stuart?
不知道
I don't know.
你们跟斯尔图特一起看过电影吗
Have you ever seen a movie with Stuart before?
感觉就像跟自己爷爷去看电影
It's like going with your grandpa.
不吃爆米花
Instead of eating popcorn,
他自带保鲜盒装的鸡肉片
he brings little pieces of chicken in Tupperware
还有保温瓶盛满了热汤
and a thermos full of soup.
他没那么糟啦
He's not that bad.
斯尔图特 你周四晚上有事吗
Hey, Stuart, got any plans Thursday night?
我的医生担心我的血液循环
My, uh... my doctor's worried about my circulation,
所以我本来打算去商场走走
so I was thinking about walking around the mall.
怎么了
Why?
你们好啊
Hey, you guys.
记得穿舒服点的鞋子哦
Oh, make sure to wear sensible shoes.
威尔 周四想一起去看《星球大战》吗
Wil, want to go to Star Wars Thursday?
当然好啊
Absolutely.
好啊 带威尔去吧
Fine, take Wil.
看他会不会给你们带蛤蜊浓汤
See if he brings you clam chowder.
好吧 好吧
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
我们...我们再过一遍所有选项
Let's-let's... let's just recap our options.
有竖琴演奏 绵羊织毛
All right, we've got harp thing, sheep thing...
狂野做♥爱♥
Wild thang.
你们觉得她最喜欢哪一个
Which do you think she'd prefer?
因为我查过羊及羊毛节的官网
Because I checked the Sheep and Wool Festival Web site,
只剩8千张票了
and there's only 8,000 tickets left.
谢尔顿 跟艾米发生肉体关系可是重大的一步啊
Sheldon, being physical with Amy is a huge step for you.
是啊 你准备好了吗
Yeah, are you ready for this?
任何形式的亲密对我来说都是挑战
Intimacy in any form has been challenging for me,
但我想向她证明她对我有多重要
but I'd like to show her how important she is,
而我感觉现在就是最好的时机
and it feels like now might be the right time.
谢尔顿 这理由太美了
Sheldon, that's so beautiful.
那就这么定了
Then it's settled.
艾米的生日礼物就是我的生殖器
Amy's birthday present will be my genitals.
多谢你们带我出去
Thanks for taking me out.
既然你的生日要跟谢尔顿一起过
Well, you're spending your birthday with Sheldon.
何不跟我们提前庆祝呢
Why not celebrate early?
你想去哪里
So where do you want to go?
我听说格林路上那间新的墨西哥餐厅不错
I heard that new Mexican place on Green Street is good.
好啊
Sure, sure.
或者我们可以带你去做比基尼蜜蜡脱毛
Or we could take you to get a bikini wax.
为什么我生日要做比基尼蜜蜡脱毛
Why would I get a bikini wax for my birthday?
不知道 我就随口一说
Uh, I don't know. It was just a thought.
我觉得还是去吃墨西哥菜好了
I think I'll just stick to Mexican.
很好 吃完以后我们可以去看部小黄♥片♥
Great. And then maybe after, we can watch a dirty movie,
如果有人对怎么回事或怎么做有疑问
and if anybody has any questions about what happened or how,
我们可以负责解答
we can answer them.
好吧 到底怎么回事
Okay, what is going on?
我们只是希望你对
Oh, we just want you to be prepared
明天可能发生的惊喜做好准备
for any surprises that might happen tomorrow.
什么惊喜
What surprises?
我们不想剧透坏了惊喜
We don't want to spoil anything,
但谢尔顿说
but you should know that
他做好跟你发生肉体关系的准备了
Sheldon said he's ready to be physical.
你们少他妈逗我玩
You shut your damn mouth!
你们真的听到他这么说了吗
You actually heard him say this?
是的 他说了他想做点什么
Yes. He said he wants to do something
来证明你对他有多重要
to show you how much you mean to him.
真不敢相信
I-I can't believe it. I...
我不知道该说什么了
I don't know what to say.
我们很为你高兴
Well, we're really happy for you,
我们都知道他多看重...
and we know how much he cares...
我知道说什么了 快给我下♥体♥除毛
I do know what to say! Let's get me waxed!
为什么永远都不是安吉·迪金森的卧室
Why isn't it ever Angie Dickinson's bedroom?
以美♥腿♥闻名的性感女星
你回来了
You're back.
这似乎不是我能决定的
It-it doesn't seem like it's up to me.
我猜你来是因为
I suppose you're here because...
我决定跟我的女朋友发生肉体关系了
I've decided to be physical with my girlfriend,
而我以前从来没有做过
and I've never done that before.
稍等一下
E-Excuse me for a moment.
至少努力过了
Well, it was worth a shot.
所以你能帮我吗
So, can you help me?
好吧
Uh, all right. Um...
当一个男人
once-once the man gets
把一个女人的灯笼内♥裤♥脱掉
the-the woman out of her... out of her bloomers...
不 不是那个
Oh, no. Not that.
我知道"做"法
I-I understand the mechanics.
很好 因为...
Oh, good, good. 'Cause, uh,
我完全不知道现在的孩子们
I have no idea what kids these days are...
都怎么称呼他们的"部位"
calling their-their parts.
他们好像是说"大屌♥"[垃圾]
I think they say "junk".
这世界到底怎么了
What is happening to this world?
你究竟想知道什么
What-what do you actually need to know?
那一晚将对我俩来说都很重要
This is an important night for us,
我有点担心自己会太紧张
and I'm worried I might be overwhelmed
然后搞砸了
and ruin everything.
谢尔顿 如果对方是对的人
Sheldon, if-if you're with the right person,
一切都会水到渠成
it-it'll be okay.
谢谢你 亚瑟
Thank you, Arthur.
你是世界上最有智慧的人
You are the wisest of the wise.
很高兴你能这么说
Well, that's-that's very nice of you to say,
可我觉得我只不过是
but I think I'm just an expression of...
你潜意识的映射
of your unconscious mind.
当然了
Oh, sure. Yeah.
但是看着你挺好玩的嘛
Well, you're fun to look at.
就是今晚了
Tonight's the night!
是啊 终于等到了
Yeah, the wait is finally over!
对啊 你们终于可以不再提这事了
I know. Then you'll finally stop talking about it!
-准备好了吗 -来吧
- Ready to go? - Let's do this.
祝你们开心哦
Have fun, guys!
-我们会的 -不敢相信谢尔顿会放弃这个
- We will. - I can't believe Sheldon gave this up.
是啊 我们肯定会玩得比他开心得多
I know. We're gonna have so much more fun than him.
不 他们不会的
No, they're not.
依他们的尿性 会的
Knowing them, they will.
倒数15分钟
T minus 15 minutes!
威尔联♥系♥你了吗
Oh, did you hear from Wil?
他在路上了
Yeah, he's on his way.
膀胱检查时间
Time for bladder check.
检查完毕
Check.
检查完毕
Check.
检查完毕 等等
Check. Wait.
管他的 我决定忍♥着
Screw it. I'm holding it.
大家都在嘘什么
What is everyone booing at?
生活大爆炸
The Big Bang Theory
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