生活大爆炸

The Big Bang Theory S09E03

Part 3 Oct. 5, 2019, 10:09 a.m.

I'm feeling a little dizzy from all the blood loss.
我听不懂你在说什么
I don't know what you're talking about.
好吧我给我家打电♥话♥
Fine. I'm calling home,
我打完以后你给你妈打电♥话♥
but when I'm done, you're calling your mother.
你说得倒轻巧
Easy for you to say.
你又不需要这样偷偷摸摸地看《新闻60分》
You never had to watch 60 Minutes like this.
爸爸
Hey, Daddy.
帅妞
Hey, slugger.
你过得好吗
How's my girl?
挺好我妈在吗
Uh, good. Is mom around?
她带你哥哥出去庆祝了
Ah, she took your brother out to celebrate.
他刚获得了他的第十个"一个月没喝酒"奖章
He just got his tenth one-month sober chip.
她要给他做个奖章小项链
Yeah, she's gonna make him a little necklace.
我待会再打给她
Okay, I'll talk to her later.
爸爸我有事要告诉你
Uh, Dad, there's something I need to tell you.
我和莱纳德结婚了
Leonard and I got married.
真的吗
You did?
什么时候
When?
上周对不起我应该早点告诉你
Last week. I'm sorry, I should've told you.
都怪我们一时冲动
It was a spur of the moment thing.
我觉得很愧疚
I feel terrible.
求求你不要对我失望
Please don't be too disappointed.
你开心吗
Are you happy?
开心呀
Very.
莱纳德是个非常棒的人
Leonard is so great.
那我为你开心
Well, then I'm happy for you.
谢谢你爸爸
Aw, thank you, Daddy.
这对我来说太重要了
That means so much.
我明白那些会让人难过的事
Well, I understand it's hard to tell someone something
是挺难说出口的
if you think it's gonna upset 'em.
没错
It is.
你真是世上最好的爸爸
You're the best dad ever.
是啊先别这么说
Yeah. Uh, hold that thought.
我也有个小事没告诉你
I've been sitting on a little news myself.
什么事
Well, what is it?
你知道我为拖拉机配了个旋转式耕耘机吗
You know that rototiller I got for the tractor?
不知道
No.
你真该来看一看
Oh, you should see it.
这机器太帅了
It is a beautiful piece of machinery.
总之...
Anyway, uh...
我倒车时把你的宠物猪绞进去了
I backed over your pet pig with it.
小月舞吗
Moondance?
是的他已经没法跳舞了
Yeah, he's, uh, not dancing anymore.
你弄死了我的猪
You killed my pig?
不是我♥干♥的
I did not kill him.
是兽医结果了他
The vet took care of that.
什么时候的事
When?
大概10到12个月之前吧
Oh... ten, 12 months ago.
你瞒了一年都不告诉我吗
You didn't tell me for a year?!
哈哈有其父必有其女对吧
Well, apple doesn't fall far from the tree, does it?
爱你帅妞挂了
Love ya, slugger. Gotta go!
好了艾米该你了
Okay, Amy, your turn.
你在干什么
What are you doing?
这叫做拉玛泽呼吸法
It's called Lamaze breathing.
一种有效减分娩疼痛的呼吸法
有助于帮你使劲
It helps you push.
太好了
Great.
他在使子♥宫♥的劲呢
He's pushing with his uterus.
肯定还有更好的办法来拧
There's got to be a smarter way of removing it.
对呀这不过是个简单的物理问题
Yeah, this is nothing more than a physics problem.
没错
Right.
阿基米德曾经说
Archimedes once said,
"给我一根足够长的杠杆
"Give me a leever long enough
和一个支点
and a fulcrum on which to place it,
我就能撑起地球"
and I shall move the world."
没错
Of course.
我们只需要找到
All we need is to find stuff
一根足够长的杠杆
to make a leever big enough to fix this.
说得对
Exactly.
我想这周围肯定有什么
I'll bet there's something around here
可以用来做杠棍
that could be a lehver.
我想想杠棍杠棍
Let's see, a lehver, A lehver...
等一下
Everybody hold on!
我们先一步一步地来解决这个问题
Let's take this problem one step at a time.
首先我们需要决定
First, we need to decide
到底是叫杠杆还是杠棍
whether we're calling it leever or lehver.
一旦我们确定了叫杠杆
And the sooner we decide it's leever,
我们就能挽起袖子而不是舅子
the sooner we can roll up our sleeves-- not slehves--
开始工作了
and get to work.
我们要"允远"留在这鬼地方了
We're gonna be here "Foreever."
我谢谢你们全家啊
Thanks a lot, guys.
关我们什么事
What did we do?
在我打那通电♥话♥之前
Before I made that call,
我的猪猪还活着
my pig was alive and happy
欢快地在泥巴里打滚
and rolling around in the mud.
现在他被非法葬在我们家后院
Now he's illegally buried in our backyard
紧挨着我太奶奶
next to my great-grandmother.
真的吗没有被吃掉
Really? They didn't eat him?
没有
No.
他是我们挚爱的家族成员
He was a beloved member of the family.
早餐肉中的成员吗
The breakfast meat family?
这不好笑
It's not funny.
该你了给你妈打电♥话♥
You're up. Call your mother.
还是等会吧
Oh, maybe later.
猪猪不幸逝世让我深感悲痛
Your pig dying made me sad.
还有点饿
And a little hungry.
马上打电♥话♥
Phone, now.
知道了好了
Okay. Okay.
好吧
Fine.
喂妈妈啊
Hi, Mom.
你倒是拨号♥啊
Try dialing.
被你看穿了呀
You saw that, huh?
妈妈你好吗
Hi, Mom. How are you doing?
我也好
Oh, good.
工作怎么样
How's work?
挺好的
That's nice.
我很好
I'm fine.
听着我一直想问
Hey, listen, I've been meaning to ask,
多姨和弗洛伦斯姨怎么一直处不来呢
how come Aunt Doe and Aunt Florence never got along?
给我吧
Okay, just... give me that.
艾米跟谢尔顿分手了
Amy broke up with Sheldon,
她打了耳洞
she got her ears pierced
还非逼我们吃大屌♥饼干
and she made us eat penis cookies!
等等
Hang on.
她想跟你谈谈
She wants to talk to you.
我感觉杠杆没起作用
I don't think the lever's working.
你凭啥那么说
What makes you say that?
肯定有别的方法可以试试
There's gotta be something else we can try.
这要是在《星际迷航》里
If this was Star Trek,
我们可以用相位枪把它炸开
we could use a phaser to blast it off.
不行激光束太粗了
No, it's too broad of a beam.
要更精准的
You'd need something more precise,
比如超人的热视线
like Superman's heat vision.
或者绿灯侠的能量戒指
Ooh, the Green Lantern's ring
可以变成大绿手来拧松它
could make a big green hand that unscrews it.
如果要大绿手
If you need a green hand,
何不直接找绿巨人
why not just use the Hulk?
得了吧
Oh, please,
绿巨人那个脾气哪过得了边防
the Hulk would never get across the border with that temper.
大伙插一句
Guys, excuse me,
不是说呼叫复仇者联盟的人来
not that calling one of the Avengers