生活大爆炸

The Big Bang Theory S09E06

Part 3 Oct. 5, 2019, 10:09 a.m.

being a wedding planner who can't find love.
不过我现在的确是单身你有人可以介绍给我吗
Although I am currently single, if you know anybody.
钱给你买♥♥卖♥♥能继续吗
Here's the money. Can we do this?
好吧
Okay.
那些占你们便宜的科学家实在太不要脸了
It's a shame about those scientists ripping you off.
我还以为瑞典的朋友们
I expected a higher ethical standard
道德标准会更高呢
from our friends in Sweden.
这事在我们学术界其实挺常见的
It's actually pretty common in our field.
我们也拿他们没办法
Not much you can do about it.
如果你们出的价够高
Well, for the right amount of money,
又知道他们的住址
if you know where they live,
我倒是知道好多种对付他们的"办法"
there's, uh, plenty we could do about it.
听到了吗莱纳德
Did you hear that, Leonard?
我们有好多种对付他们的办法呢
There's plenty we could do about it.
你有名片吗
Do you have a card?
好了出来啦
Okay, here we go.
现在大家都能看到了
Now everyone can see.
好的
All right.
大家觉得斗鸡眼麦克如何啊
Where do we stand on cross-eyed Mike?
好歹他不能乱瞟看别的姑娘了
You know he won't be looking at other girls.
除非她们坐在他鼻头上
Unless they're sitting on the end of his nose.
好好好按"烂"
Okay, okay, okay. Thumbs down.
下一个
Next.
看看他那一嘴小牙齿
Ew, check out his tiny teeth.
他好像一只人形海豚
He looks like a man-dolphin.
如果他床技超群你可以丢一条小鱼作奖励
Wait, if he's good in bed, she can throw him a fish.
我爱你艾米
I love you, Amy.
我开始有罪恶感了
Okay, I'm starting to feel guilty.
我们是不是太毒舌了啊
Aren't we being a little mean?
你说得对
That's a fair point.
我们肯定不会当着本人的面这么取笑他
We wouldn't make fun of someone like this to their face.
看是斯图尔特
Look, it's Stuart!
你最好回避一下吧
You may want to leave the room.
这边请哈维叔叔
Right this way, Uncle Harvey.
你能不能别装了
Will you stop with that already?
我这是在避免引人注意
I'm trying not to attract attention.
你让他向清洁女工脱帽致意还不够引人注意吗
And tipping his hat to the cleaning lady didn't do that?
她说了"晚安"[西语] 我叔叔还能怎么做
She said, "Buenas noches." What was he supposed to do?
我们还是赶紧开始实验吧
Let's just start the experiment.
莱纳德我们应该把故事编圆了
Leonard, we should probably have our story straight
以防到时被抓住
in case we get caught.
我们不会被抓的
We're not getting caught.
你又不能保证这一点
Well, you can't be sure of that.
万一卖♥♥氦气的人出♥卖♥♥♥我们呢
What if the helium dealer rats us out?
万一克里普奇问起这氦气的来历呢
What if Kripke asks where we got it?
万一学校查了我的家谱
What if the university checks my family tree
发现我根本就没有一个哈维叔叔怎么办
and finds out I don't have an Uncle Harvey?
卖♥♥家没这么无聊克里普奇又管不着我们
The dealer doesn't care, Kripke has no authority over us,
而你和金属罐子有亲属关系
and you being related to a metal container
反而更能解释你的种种
would explain a lot.
帮我把它接起来
Help me hook this up.
怎么了
What?
-你看到这个贴纸了吗 -怎么了
- Well, did you see this sticker? - What is it?
虽然掉了一大半不过剩下部分还依稀可见
It's partially torn off, but the segment that remains reads:
专属财产和一个U字
"Property of" and the letter "U."
可能是南加大或加州大学洛杉矶分校吧
It's probably USC or UCLA.
但万一指的是美国[U.S.]政♥府♥专属财产怎么办
Yeah, but what if it's "Property of U.S. Government"?
德州的阿马里洛就有一个国家氦气保护区
There's a national helium reserve in Amarillo, Texas.
如果这个是从那里偷的
If this was stolen from there,
我们就犯下了联邦重罪
we're accessories to a federal crime.
别这么快就下结论
Let's not jump to conclusions.
U可以指好多东西呢
A lot of things start with "U."
你说得对
That's true.
可以指美国空军
There's the U.S. Air Force,
美国国防部美国海军
U.S. Department of Defense, U.S. Navy,
还可以指你和我一起吃牢饭
"You" And I are going to jail.
听着我们可以按计划做完实验
Listen, we can do the experiment as planned
让瑞典人哭着回家找妈妈
and beat the Swedish team to the punch,
或者我们可以和科研梦吻别
or we can kiss our dreams good-bye
因为我们不敢违反一点小规则
because we were to afraid to break a few rules.
女士您好
Ma'am.
好了大家都记住规则了吗
Okay, does everyone remember the rules?
如果他没穿衣服喝一口
If he's shirtless, one sip.
带着宠物摆姿势喝两口
Posing with a pet, two sips.
带宠物又没穿衣服猛灌
Pet and shirtless, chug like it's your job.
开始
And pull!
这条内♥裤♥我也有
I have that same underwear!
灌
Chug!
艾米你收到条短♥信♥
Mm, Amy, you're getting a text.
给我
Oh, um, give me that.
"昨晚玩得很愉快"
"I had a great time last night."
戴夫昨晚过得很愉快
停停停都别看了
No, no, st-stop reading that.
-谁是戴夫 -我...
- Who's Dave? - I...
你昨晚上去约会了
You went on a date last night?
你在跟谁交往吗
Are you seeing someone?
没有不是那样的
No, it-it's not like that.
"我很乐意再约你出来玩"
"And I'd love to take you out again"?
-艾米 -什么
- Amy! - What?
-难以置信啊 -我的神啊
- Can't believe it. - Oh, my God.
好吧就是那样
Okay, it's like that.
感谢你能回来
Thank you for coming back.
没事通常情况下我不会的
Yeah, well, normally I wouldn't,
可我女儿跟她的朋友们今晚在我家住
but my daughter's having a sleepover, and there's only
尖叫加水果姐姐已经超越我的承受极限了
so much screaming and Katy Perry a man can take.
美国知名女歌♥手歌♥曲大多唱女性自强自尊
颇受小女孩到青少年女性喜欢
总之把钱还给我们
Anyway, if you could just give us our money back,
你拿走你的氦气我们马上走
you can have your helium and we'll be on our way.
好它有什么问题吗
Yeah, well, is there something wrong with it?
没有我们只是改变主意了
No, nothing. We just changed our mind.
他是四眼田鸡我是自以为是的瘦竹竿
He has glasses and I'm a know-it-all;
我俩不适合蹲监狱
we are not built for prison.
也是有道理
Yeah, I hear you.
你们俩是好人所以我...
Well, you're good guys, so I'll, uh...
我会把氦气拿走
I'll take the helium off your hands.
谢谢你
Thank you.
但是钱不能还给你们
But you ain't getting your money back.
你是想占我俩便宜吗
You're taking advantage of us?
我们不是一起弄清过语义吗
We clarified nomenclature together.
虽然我跟普通人一样都爱听语义教学
Look, I enjoy semantic digressions as much as the next guy,
可是在商言商嘛
but, uh, this is business.
算了
You know what?
就这样吧钱你留着
It's fine. Keep the money.
我们只想赶紧脱手
We just want to be done with this.
没问题但我得跟你们收点
No problem, but I am gonna have to charge you
氦气退货费
a small helium restocking fee.
我不懂了
I don't understand.
他想再要钱
He wants more money.
那最好别超过一千美金
Well, it better not be more than a thousand dollars;
我身上就这么多了
that's all I've got on me.
正好就是那数
That's exactly how much it is.
终于
Finally,
有个顺利的事了
something breaks our way.
不敢相信你居然在跟人约会
I can't believe you're seeing someone
而我们什么都不知道
and we don't even know about it.
对你为什么不告诉我们呢
Yeah, why wouldn't you tell us?
因为这事才开始又很奇怪
Because it's new and weird
我自己还在摸索阶段
and I'm just trying to figure it all out.
而且我知道如果告诉了你们
And I knew if I told you guys
我已经跟几个人约过会了
I had been out with a few people
你们肯定会表现得太过兴奋
that you'd get way too excited about it.