生活大爆炸
The Big Bang Theory S09E04
Part 3
Oct. 5, 2019, 10:09 a.m.
我也是啊
Well, so do I,
可你不想跟自己老婆住在一起吗
but don't you want to live with your wife
想怎么设恒温器就怎么设
and set the thermostat to whatever you want
还有让你的身体告诉你
and have your body tell you
何时想上厕所了才去
when it's time to go to the bathroom,
而不是每天早上
you know, not a schedule slipped
一张从你门缝塞进来的时间表
underneath your door every morning?
我挺喜欢那上面的天气预报
I did like that he had the weather on it.
相信我 这么做是正确的
Trust me, this is the right thing.
我知道
I know.
而且我们又不是抛弃他
And it's not like we're abandoning him.
再说了
Plus,
我们随时可以视频聊天啊
we can FaceTime him whenever we want,
等他所在的那个宇宙发明了iPhone就行了
you know, once iPhones are invented in his universe.
真不敢相信谢尔顿让你当他的室友
I can't believe Sheldon asked you to be his roommate.
真不敢相信他查我的信用记录
I can't believe he ran my credit.
如果你愿意接纳一个很棒的室友
Hey, if you're open to living with someone great,
我给你一千块把斯尔图特带走
I'll give you $1,000 to take Stuart.
你当时带他回家时
You really should've gone on the Internet
真应该上网查查那种生物
and checked how long that kind of thing lives
能存活多久
before you got one.
抱歉
I'm sorry.
我只是以为你的生活
I just thought you might have
可能有个苍白怪胎的洞需要补上
a pasty, weirdo-shaped hole in your life.
我知道谢尔顿为人古怪
Hey, I know Sheldon's quirky,
但他同时聪明又有见解
but he's also brilliant and insightful.
我觉得叫他怪胎不太公平吧
I think calling him a weirdo is a little unfair.
你好 2003年
Hello, 2003!
我们给你打包了泰国菜
Hey, we brought you Thai.
东西都哪去了
Where is everything?
于我来说 是在我的未来
In my present, it's in the future.
于你来说 是在你的卧室
In your present, it's been crammed in the bedroom
我让那位在家具店停车场认识的
by an enterprising young man
有干劲的年轻人全塞进去了
I met in The Home Depot parking lot.
我知道你在干什么
I know what you're doing.
你想引起我们的注意 让我们对你心生内疚
You're trying to get attention so we'll feel bad for you,
但这没有用
but it's not happening.
不 我是在努力搞清
No, what I'm doing is trying to figure out
自己该如何生活 因为大家都离我而去
how to live my life now that everyone is leaving me.
你歇歇吧 我们就住在对门
Will you knock it off? We're across the hall.
用现在孩子们的说法"懒得鸟你"
As the kids are saying today, "Talk to the hand."
现在孩子们不这么说
They're not saying that.
2003年的时候是这么说
They are in 2003.
不 他们真不这么说
No, they're really not.
♪ 雷神索尔和博士琼斯 ♪
♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪
♪ 雷神索尔和博士琼斯 ♪
♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪
♪ 一个躲着洛基逃 ♪
♪ One runs from Loki ♪
♪ 一个避着石头跑 ♪
♪ The other runs from stones. ♪
你觉得如何
So, what do you think?
那颗石头其实是颗大滚石
Runs from stones means that-that big boulder,
但是我想不出跟滚石押韵的词
but I couldn't rhyme anything with boulder.
诚实 结实
Colder, shoulder,
钻石 宝石
soldier, folder...
对对对
Right, yeah, right.
但是
But...
你觉得如何
what do you think?
我觉得非常可爱
I think it's very cute.
可爱 这不可爱
Cute? It's not cute.
可爱是形容儿童扮成蔬菜
Cute is children dressed as vegetables.
好吧 不可爱
Okay, fine, it's not cute.
你就实话实说 你不喜欢
Just be honest. You don't like it.
我没有这么说
I didn't say that.
我只是喜欢可以跳舞的音乐
I-I just like music you can dance to.
这首歌♥也可以跳舞啊
You can dance to this!
♪ 雷神索尔和博士琼斯 ♪
♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪
♪ 雷神索尔和博士琼斯 ♪
♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪
♪ 一个喜欢玩闪电 ♪
♪ One plays with lightning ♪
♪ 一个喜欢玩骨头 ♪
♪ The other plays with bones. ♪
我跟你说 哥们 这首歌♥没动感
I'm telling you, dude, the song has no groove.
不能随着跳舞
You can't dance to it.
谁在乎啊
Who cares?
我还以为月球足迹乐队
I thought the whole point of Footprints on the Moon
主要是写出能让人思考的歌♥
was to write songs that make people think.
两者皆可顾啊
You can do both,
就像迈克·杰克逊的《比莉·珍》
like Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean."
你会一边跳舞一边思考
While you're dancing you're thinking, like,
"靠 歌♥词唱的小孩到底是谁的"
"Darn it, whose baby is it?"
你这想法都打哪儿来的
Where's this coming from?
几个小时前 我们都很爱这首歌♥
A few hours ago, we both loved this song.
我还是爱啊
I still love it.
只是认为它有进步的空间而已
I just think there's room for improvement.
你唱给艾米丽听了 对不对
You played it for Emily, didn't you?
对 那又怎样
Yeah, so what?
你这个妻管严
You are such a wimp.
她不喜欢 你就也不喜欢了
She didn't like it, now you don't like it.
不 只是我这个音乐人在进步
No, no. I'm just evolving as a musician.
而你却停在过去止步不前
You're the one who's stuck in the past.
你说的过去就是一顿午饭前
The past was lunch!
你知道这到底是怎么回事吗
You know what's really happening here?
你的女友在破坏我们的乐队
Your girlfriend is breaking up our band.
这事跟她无关
She has nothing to do with this.
我有我自己的想法
I am my own man.
拜托吧 你的大脑就属于
Oh, please. Your brain belongs
任何一个愿意跟你上♥床♥的人
to whoever's willing to sleep with you.
-才不是呢 -真的吗
- That is so not true. - Really?
还记得你差点为了那叫瑞秋的姑娘
Remember when you were gonna get circumcised
去割包皮吗
for Rachel Bernstein?
那个跟瑞秋没关系
That had nothing to do with Rachel.
是我因为包皮被拉链夹到 一时冲动的想法
It was an overreaction to a bad zipper injury.
我受够了
I don't need this.
我要退出乐队
I'm quitting the band!
好 我也退
Fine, I quit, too!
那你就滚出我家
Then get out of my house!
巴不得呢
With pleasure!
拉杰 等等
Raj, wait.
怎么这么久才叫人家
What took you so long?
兄弟 我知道我搬去跟佩妮住
Buddy, I know me moving in with Penny
感觉好像变化很大
feels like a big change,
但其实并没有
but it's not.
你怎么能这么说
How can you say that?
艾米离开了
Amy's gone,
现在你们俩也结婚了
and you two are married now,
你们的离开也只剩时间问题了
so it's only a matter of time before you're gone, too.
好了 你不知道未来会怎么样
Okay, you don't know what's gonna happen.
不 我知道
No, I do.
最终你们会需要更多的空间
Eventually you'll want more space,
然后会搬进一栋房♥子里
and you'll move into a house,
一起吃晚餐的次数从一周几次
and then instead of dinner a couple of times a week,
变成了一个月几次
it'll only be a couple of times a month,
之后就只有特殊日子才会相聚
and then it'll only be on special occasions,
比如伯纳黛特要跟沃罗威茨离婚
like when Bernadette divorces Wolowitz.
或者比如
Or-or-or like
库萨帕里的诡异女友
when Koothrappali's weird girlfriend
终于讲出把他的尸体埋哪了
admits where she buried his body.
或者艾米的婚礼
Or Amy's wedding,
她嫁给一个比我更好的人
where she's marrying someone better than me.
好吧 听着
Okay, look,
我们不需要操之过急
we don't need to rush into anything.
好吗
All right?
或者莱纳德不用搬去跟我住
Maybe instead of Leonard moving in with me,
生活大爆炸
The Big Bang Theory
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