生活大爆炸

The Big Bang Theory S09E02

Part 2 Oct. 5, 2019, 10:09 a.m.

却没有告诉她
and haven't told her,
她肯定会认为我是一个坏朋友
she's gonna think I'm a terrible friend.
真希望你从未告诉我
I wish you never told me.
我也希望莱纳德从未告诉我
And I wish Leonard never told me.
他才是最坏的那个
He's the bad guy here.
的确是
I guess that's true.
而你还让佩妮嫁给他
And you let Penny marry him.
比起这个我买♥♥的乔治·克鲁尼
Compared to that, who cares if I bought
限♥量♥版的体毛修剪套装根本不值得一提
a George Clooney limited edition manscaping kit?
你好我想预约你们的婚姻咨♥询♥服务
Hi. I'm calling about your marriage counseling services
请问一般怎么收费
and was curious what your rate is.
不是吧
Really?
好吧
Um, okay.
能根据婚姻的长短打折吗
Is there any kind of discount for length of marriage?
我说的是以小时计算的婚姻
'Cause we're just talking hours here.
-在呀 -等会打给你
- Hi. - Call you back.
我们能聊聊吗
Can we talk?
我十分乐意
I would love that.
听着
All right, look,
很抱歉在结婚之前
I'm sorry I said I was okay with everything
我说我不介意
before we got married.
我讨厌我们现在有这矛盾
I hate that we're going through this,
但我不知道该怎么做
but I don't know what to do.
如果你不介意等团购劵出来
If you don't mind waiting for a Groupon,
我们可以试试婚姻咨♥询♥
we can try marriage counseling.
你们在呀
Hello.
伙计
Hey, uh, buddy,
你能回避一下吗
can we have some privacy?
当然可以
Oh, of course.
我也不想打扰你们
Wouldn't want to intrude.
这是你的
This is yours.
等我跟他谈完
Okay, when I'm done with him,
咱俩再好好聊聊
I'm gonna need more information.
没什么不妥的
Nothing odd.
我就拿来让艾米难堪而已
I just wanted to rub Amy's nose in it.
听着我可能是反应过度了
Okay, look, I might be overreacting,
但我怎么可能明知道
but how am I supposed to get past this
你明天去上班就会见到她我怎么不介意
when I know tomorrow you're gonna go to work
会见到这个女人
and see this woman?
原谅我偷听了
Forgive me for eavesdropping,
但在我看来有一个简单的解决办法
but as I see it, there's a simple solution.
醒醒快醒醒
Wake up, wake up, wake up.
带佩妮去见曼蒂
Bring Penny to meet Mandy.
为什么
What? Why?
现在佩妮的胡思乱想根本停不下来
Well, right now, Penny's imagination is running wild,
但如果她们见面了就能消除曼蒂的神秘感
but if they meet, that will eliminate the mystery
减轻佩妮的恐惧感
and alleviate her fears.
就像那个独眼龙揭了眼罩让我看
Like when that Sparkletts guy let me look under his eye patch.
首先你把人家弄哭了
Uh, first of all, you made that guy cry.
而我们学到了没有眼珠也能哭
And we learned that you don't need an eyeball to do that.
其次带佩妮去见曼蒂
Secondly, I can't think of a more horrible idea
这个主意糟透了
than Penny meeting Mandy.
是吗怎么说
Really? Why is that?
怎么你还真想见她
What, you actually want to meet her?
不啊但现在看你对此反应异常
No, but now that you're being weird about it,
或许我真该去
maybe I should.
我才没有反应异常
I'm not being weird.
我有反应异常吗
Am I being weird?
有啊
Yes.
连我这种怪咖都这么觉得
And that's coming from me.
好吧你想见她吗
Fine, you want to meet her?
不我只想知道你们俩上班时
No, I just want to know that when you're at work,
不会发生任何越轨的事
there's nothing going on.
我得说多少遍你才信
How many times do I have to tell you?
我对这个女人一点兴趣都没有
I have no interest in this woman.
或许人家对你有兴趣呢
Yeah, well, maybe she has interest in you.
对莱纳德吗
In Leonard?
就连独眼龙都看得出没可能好吗
Oh, even the Sparkletts guy could see that's unlikely.
我想我最在意的点就是
I guess my big problem is I never saw Leonard
我从来没想过莱纳德也会做这种事
as the kind of guy who woulde do something like this.
人容易在脆弱的时候犯错
Anybody can make a mistake in a weak moment.
你觉得呢
What do you think?
我完全没有想法
Oh, I don't know what to think.
再重申一次我是刚刚才知道这事
But then again, I just found out about it.
我之所以爱上莱纳德
You know, I fell in love with Leonard
是因为他和我曾经交往过的
because he wasn't anything like the guys
其他人不同
I was used to dating.
我知道那些渣男都喜欢出轨
I mean, I knew those guys weren't above cheating
因为我就是他们的小三
because that's usually how we met.
你知道莱纳德不是那样的人
Come on, you know Leonard's not like that.
我很想相信你真的
I want to believe you. I really do.
是我好傻好天真了吗
Am I being naive?
我不知道
Oh, I don't know.
第一次听到这事
This is all so new to me.
我还在努力消化中
I'm still processing.
我们刚认识时他根本不可能做这种事
You know, he never would've done this when we first met.
他现在可能耐了
He's cockier now.
那是因为你让他变得自信了
That's because you made him more confident.
你仔细想想如果没有你
You know, if you think about it, without you,
怎么可能有现在意气风发的他
he never would've grown into the person he is now.
虽然他现在受欢迎了
I mean, sure, more women might notice him,
但他愿意放弃弱水三千
but I think it's better to have a guy be with you
与你相守
because he wants to be
总好过他觉得自己没人爱只好巴着你啊
and not because he thinks he doesn't have any other choice.
我还从没这样想过
I never thought about it like that.
我也没有这是刚想到的
Oh, me neither, not until just now.
大家好我是谢尔顿·库伯博士
Hello. I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper,
欢迎收看谢尔顿·库珀出品的《有趣的旗帜》
and welcome to "Sheldon Cooper Presents: Fun With Flags."
你可能注意到我手上拿着遥控器
You may notice that I'm holding a remote control.
那是因为我的摄影师兼主持搭档
That's because my cameraperson and co-host,
艾米·法拉·福勒博士
Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler,
选择中止了与我之间的感情关系
has chosen to end her relationship with me.
我先暂停一会让你们消化一下
I'm going to pause here to let that sink in.
好了
Okay.
如果你需要更多时间消化
If you need to pause a little longer,
请按下你的暂停键
just click the pause button.
但我的节目还得继续
But the show must go on.
万幸的是我前女友的一切功能
And thankfully, all the things my girlfriend used to do
我的右手都可以取代
can be taken care of with my right hand.
好了我们不要再提她了
Anyway, let's not spend any more time talking about her.
我们节目的重点是旗帜
We're here to talk about flags.
今天的主题是
Tonight's theme:
国破人亡的国家国旗
flags of countries that have been torn apart
以及我认为该对此负责的红颜祸水们
and the women I have a feeling were responsible.
你们知道接受婚姻咨♥询♥
You guys have any idea how much it costs
需要多少钱吗
to see a marriage counselor?
每小时250刀怎么了
$250 an hour. Why?
你怎么知道
How do you know?
博纳黛特和我偶尔会去参加一次
Bernadette and I have occasionally gone to one to,
防范于未然嘛
you know, stay on top of things.
而我却是头一次听说这事
And I'm just hearing about this now?
老弟虽然我俩是好基友
Dude, just because we're best friends
但不代表我非得把所有事都告诉你吧
doesn't mean that I have to tell you everything that goes on.
你不是非得要而是应该主动想要
You don't have to, you should want to.
这下好了曼蒂来了
Oh, great, there's Mandy.
海洋生物学家怎么都这么可爱
Why are marine biologists always so cute?
我不知道
I don't know,
但我愿迷失在她的百慕大"三角洲"中
but I'd like to get lost in her Bermuda Triangle.
你这话一点用都没有
That's not helpful.
那我就不告诉你
Then I won't say