杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl S03E23
Part 5
Nov. 20, 2020, 3:12 p.m.
Yeah. You know, I think it's a landmine for trouble.
你知道 这是潜在的麻烦
What's gonna happen when other hunks come around?
家里要是来了帅哥该怎么办
What's gonna happen when you bring some ho-bag in the house?
你要是带回来小贱♥货♥该怎么办
Exactly! Like, that... it's scary stuff, and I feel like
没错 那很吓人 而且我觉得
when a breakup happens, you mostly get away.
人们分手之后 一般都会保持距离
'Cause I'm gonna beat her ass.
因为我会揍她的
What if she's bigger than you?
她要是比你壮怎么办
She probably will be.
很有可能
Oh, snap! That was good.
少来了 这个笑话好
Good for you!
很好
Yeah! I saw that, man.
没错 我就知道 伙计
That's how it all starts. This is how it starts.
就是这样 都是这样开始的
Good. That's good, man, that's really good.
很好 很好伙计 非常好
Yeah.
对
Well, it's nice to talk to you about this.
很高兴能跟你说这个
Yeah, it was really weird when you...
昨晚你想要亲我
tried to kiss me last night,
还有舔我耳朵的时候
and you licked my ear.
真的很诡异
What?! What?! You guys kissed last night?
什么 什么 你们昨晚接吻了
This is so confusing! What?!
这也太乱了 什么
It was just a lapse. We were drunk.
那只是一时错乱 我们喝醉了
You guys are getting back together?
你们复合了吗
We're not getting back together.
我们没有复合
You're confusing everybody!
你们弄得大家都迷茫了
No, it was the Grand Romance package.
不 都是因为奢华浪漫套餐
My God!
天哪
They were, like, folding these towels.
里面那些 像叠那些毛巾
It was so sexy. You try folding towels
太情♥色♥了 你试试那样叠毛巾
like that and see if you don't get turned on.
看你会不会有反应
Yeah, because they fold the towels like vaginas.
没错 因为他们把毛巾叠得跟阴♥道♥似得
They're swans, dude.
那是天鹅 伙计
And the yoga instructor was, like, breathing
还有瑜伽教练说什么
into our genitals, and, like...
用生殖器深呼吸
It opened everyone up.
大家都发春了
Yeah.
是啊
In a real true way.
明显得很
Absolutely.
没错
This thing was ready to talk
小鸡鸡已经准备
to that thing again.
再跟它的另一半谈谈了
Emotionally and sexually. Yeah.
情感上加肉体上的 没错
What?! What?! What's wrong with you, man?
什么 你们这是有什么毛病 伙计
Are you crazy? Just pick one either
你们疯了吗 选一个吧
you're together or you're not!
你们是在一起还是没有
Gonna punch you in the face, bro!
我要打你个脸上开花 兄弟
Things are really weird.
实在是诡异
Agreed.
我赞同
But I'm okay with it.
但我还能接受
Me, too. Hey, there.
我也是 嘿
What? All right, okay.
什么 好吧
Good enough, good start. Wonderful.
挺好的 好的开始 棒极了
Thank you for doing this weird intervention thing.
谢谢你们的调解
This was pretty great. Yeah, it worked out.
挺好的 是啊 卓有成效
I think everybody's good now.
我觉得大家都没事了
Let's go eat our weight in fake crab.
我们去吃假蟹肉长肉肉吧
There you go. Absolutely. There we go.
走你 那必须的 走着
Great idea. I'm gonna get drunk.
好主意 一醉方休
I gotta get psyched up.
我要嗨起来
Gotta get psyched up.
要嗨起来
The door's stuck. Is that part of your thing?
门卡住了 是你们策划的吗
No. Well, call security.
不是 快叫保安
I got rid of the room phone.
我把房♥间电♥话♥给切了
I-I thought it was gonna be
我以为这会
more intense than this, I-I'm sorry!
比这激烈得多的 对不起
You murdered us!
你谋杀了我们
Open up! Open up! What? No.
开门 开门 什么 不
Watch out. You know what?
小心 知道吗
It's just, it's usually the handle.
一般 一般都是把手的问题
Just, like, get the handle... I'll do it, I'll do it!
弄下把手 我来 我来
I got it. All right, move. I got it.
交给我吧 好吧 让开 交给我
Guys, guys, guys! Okay, here we go.
伙计们 伙计们 开始吧
Calm down.
冷静
How long could it take for someone to hear us?
要多久才会有人听见我们求救
We did bad things to the tub.
我们在浴缸里做了不好的事
I got the sugars.
我找到糖了
I'm the sugar man.
我是小糖人
Silence! I have the talking soap!
闭嘴 说话皂在我手上
I'm the queen of Wednesday!
我是周三女王
It's so nice to have a family portrait.
有张全家福真好
We should shower less.
我们应该少洗点澡
I think we look really great.
我觉得我们看起来棒极了
I'm really glad we framed this.
把这框起来太好了
I mean, what a proud moment.
多么光荣的一刻
It is cool being in the paper, though.
上报还挺酷的
Part of me died on that boat.
那个胆小的我在船上死去了
Oh. I will never be the same again.
我再也不会那样了
All right, man. Take a nap.
好吧 伙计 去歇会儿
Sleep it off, man.
睡一觉就忘了 伙计
I'm sorry.
很抱歉
Is Cece checking out Schmidt?
希希是在凝望施密特吗
What?!
什么
Let me see that.
让我看看
What are you talking about, Winston?
你在说什么呢 温斯顿
Shame, shame,
羞羞
I know your name.
把脸羞
You do not know my name, Winston.
你不知道我的名字 温斯顿
Cece got a boyfriend who used to be Betty!
希希曾有男友叫贝蒂
Yeah, you better run, bitch.
你最好快点跑 贱♥人♥
My mustache!
我的胡子
You know, I've been thinking a lot
我一直在想
about your sleeping arrangements and... Weird.
你们的睡觉协议 诡异
I might have an idea on how to make things
我或许有个主意
a little bit less weird.
能让事情不那么诡异
Really? What is it?
真的吗 是什么
Two words.
三个字
Bunk beds. No.
上下铺 不
No, I'm not putting bunk beds in my room, Schmidt.
不 我才不要在房♥里放张上下铺 施密特
Not in your room. In my room.
不放你房♥间 放我房♥间
It'll be just like college, my man.
就跟大学时一样 伙计
Only with way more sex.
只是多了很多爱爱罢了
What? That came out wrong.
什么 我说错了
I'm not bunking with you, Schmidt.
我才不要跟你睡上下铺 施密特
Yeah, he is.
不 他跟你睡
Yeah, he is.
是啊 他跟我睡
Yeah, he is.
好吧 我跟你睡
There's gonna be a lot of rules,
那一定要有很多规矩
and I'm gonna make most of them.
而且大部分要我来定
You can make them all, man!
全都给你定 伙计
Except for the ones that I make!
除了我定的之外
First one in gets dibs!
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