极品老妈

Mom S08E03

Part 2 March 1, 2021, 11 a.m.

But I don't want you to worry.
你上过他
So you banged him.
我还想慢慢给你说呢
I was trying to ease you into it,
但没错很久以前
but yes. A long time ago.
好
Okay.
本着坦诚相告的精神
So, in the spirit of crystal clarity,
我和摇滚明星睡过
I slept with a rock star.
大卫·鲍伊才算摇滚明星
Uh, David Bowie's a rock star.
这家伙是在杰西潘尼百货给你脸上喷香水的人
This guy sprays cologne on your face at JCPenney.
有人嫉妒啦
Aw, is somebody jealous?
没有
No.
我们恋爱前都知道彼此有过去
We both came into this relationship knowing we had a past.
我的过去更精彩一些但没错
Uh, mine happens to be a little more vivid, but yes.
邦妮我当过28年特技演员
Bonnie, I was a stuntman for 28 years.
每个电影片场总会有那么一天
There comes a point on every movie set
女主角对导演不满
where the lead actress is upset with the director,
不愿和男主角说话
isn't talking to her leading man,
正在和第三任老公离婚
is divorcing her third husband,
而且吃了一个月的流质食物
and has been on a liquid diet for a month.
这时候猜猜是谁在那里
And guess who's over there,
靠在科迈罗上热身随时准备为她点烟
limbering up against a Camaro, ready to light her cigarette?
上♥床♥吧
Let's go to bed.
有意思坦娅·罗伯茨也是这样说的
Funny, that's exactly what Tanya Roberts said.
坦娅·罗伯茨算是哪门子电影明星
In what universe is Tanya Roberts a movie star?
那个傻瓜还算摇滚明星呢
The same one where that yahoo's a rock star.
还有《WKRP》里洛妮·安德森以外的那个女孩
Also, the girl from WKRP who wasn't Loni Anderson.
晚安
Good night.
经典的36英寸
Classic 36 inches.
好烤箱你呢
Okay, oven, what do you got?
让我看看
Let's see.
该死
Damn it!
塔米
Hey, Tammy.
哥们听着
Hey, buddy. Listen,
当你早上起来想考虑一下...
when you get up in the morning and you want to think about,
我不知道冰球之类的事时
I don't know, hockey or something,
你一般坐在桌子哪边
which side of the table do you sit on?
这边这里什么情况
That one. What exactly is happening here?
亚当我不只是个执业杂工
Mm. I'm more than just a licensed handyman, Adam.
我还是有个同理心的执业杂工
I'm a licensed handyman with empathy.
如果我要设计一个厨房♥
See, if I'm gonna design a kitchen,
我必须从你的角度思考
I got to see it from your perspective.
趁邦妮不在
Oh! While Bonnie's not here,
你能帮我掏一下麦片柜吗
can you raid the cereal cabinet for me?
当然可以
Oh, sure thing.
见鬼你吃麦片跟我以前嗑药似的
Dang, you eat cereal like I used to pop pills.
我拿不到
I can't reach it.
塔米你能站起来的
Tammy, you could still stand.
对说得好
Oh, yeah. Good call.
好来看看有什么
All right. Let's see, what do we got?
-黄金麦片 -好
- Ooh, Golden Grahams? - Yeah.
好
All right.
哥们这次可不是厨房♥的错
Oh, dude, that's not the kitchen's fault.
看看三十年后依然能穿上
Look what still fits after 30 years.
对哦
Oh, right. Right.
你想让我签在哪亲爱的
Where do you want me to sign, love?
我不想要你的签名罗德
Oh, I don't want your autograph, Rod.
那想自♥拍♥吗
Oh, a selfie, then?
你在逗我吗
A-Are you kidding?
是我邦妮·普兰科特
It's me, Bonnie Plunkett.
好
Okay.
我理解那是很久以前了
I understand, it's been a long time.
我帮你回忆一下
Let me refresh your memory.
法戈舞厅 1987年
Fargo Ballroom, 1987.
雷迪森酒店
Radisson Hotel.
雷迪森酒店的制冰机
Ice machine at the Radisson Hotel.
你好
Hello.
我必须道歉八十年代我全忘了
Oh, I must apologize. The '80s are gone.
被安♥眠♥酮♥和白兰地冲得干干净净
Just washed away on a sea of quaaludes and cognac.
但你一定记得我我们有过真感情
But you got to remember me. We had something real.
你甚至说过我不仅仅是个追星狂
You even said I was more than a groupie.
对追星狂一般都这么说
Well, that's what you say to groupies, you know.
这样才能骗到追星狂的炮
That's how you get a groupie.
我敢打赌我还给你弹过钢琴
I bet I even played the piano for you.
是的因为你在写一首送给我的歌♥...
You did. Because you were writing a song just for...
天啊
Oh, my God.
经典罗德
Classic Rod.
我可能不记得八十年代了
I might not remember the '80s,
但我依然要为那时道歉
but I'm still apologizing for 'em.
总之我还是可以给你衣服上签个名
Anyway, I can still sign your T-shirt.
看在老天的分上罗德收起你的笔
Oh, for God's sake, Rod, put away your Sharpie!
你声音有点大我耳鸣了
Ooh, you're getting a bit loud. That's hitting my tinnitus.
是嘛你来到我的互助会
Oh, sure. You show up at my meeting,
表现得像个伟大的超级巨星
and you act like this great, big superstar,
但只要动了真情实感你就会跳上巡演大巴
but the minute it gets real, you get back on that tour bus
悄悄溜出城你猜怎么着
and sneak out of town. Well, you know what?
不是你忘了我
You don't forget me.
是我忘了你
I forget you.
好随便你
Right, fine. Have it your way.
对走吧离开这里
Yeah, go ahead, walk away!
我希望我永远不会见到你
I hope I don't see you again!
别担心你不会的
Don't worry, you won't.
对于一个没有
Yeah, that's a lot of attitude
维基页面的人来说你还真是有骨气啊
for someone who doesn't even have a Wikipedia page!
他真没有
Well, he doesn't!
我花了一整天假装亚当在亚当的厨房♥里生活
I spent all day in Adam's kitchen living as Adam,
我必须告诉你们我真的开眼了
and I got to tell you guys, it really opened my eyes.
那你现在是不是能还我办公椅了
Does that mean I can have my office chair back?
你是认真的吗玛乔丽他不能走路
Seriously, Marjorie? The man can't walk.
我必须要算税了
I have to do my taxes.
各位你们永远不会相信的
You guys, you're never gonna believe this.
我刚跟罗德聊过
I just talked to Rod, and...
-他不记得你了 -他不记得我了
- He doesn't remember you. - He didn't remember me.
但是他现在会记得我的
But, oh-ho-ho, he will remember me now.
我给他来了套邦妮·普兰科特狮吼功
I let him have it Bonnie Plunkett-style.
我喜欢你吼不是我的人
I love it when you yell at people who aren't me.
真尴尬
Ugh, so awkward.
现在你得在每场互助会看见他了
Now you're gonna have to see him at every meeting.
不他不会再来我们的互助会了
Oh, no, he will not be coming to our meeting again.
焦土政策
Scorched earth.
怎么了
What?
没事
Never mind.
真的吗你叹了口气然后说没事
Really? You sigh, say "Never mind"?
你最近三只猫就是这样死的
This is what killed your last three cats.
你也许刚把一个酒鬼赶出了互助会
You may have just driven an alcoholic away from a meeting.
希望如此
I hope I did.
温蒂做好准备我要对玛乔丽吼了
Wendy, get ready. I'm about to yell at Marjorie.
我们的互助会房♥间需要成为每个人的安全空间
Our rooms need to be a safe space for everybody.
邦妮欠罗德一个道歉
Bonnie owes Rod an amends.
我不欠
No, I don't.
我不欠
No, I don't.
确定是这里吗
Sure this is the right place?
在暗网上查了查
A few clicks on the ol' dark web,
就找到了他的地址
and I found his address.
我还拿到了你的亚马逊会员账号♥
I also got your Amazon Prime login,
明晚九点之前会有
so expect some running shoes in my size
我穿的尺码的跑鞋到货
to come tomorrow by 9:00 P.M.
什么事
Yes?
你好
Oh, hello.
这是罗德·康诺顿家吗
Uh, is this the Rod Connaughton residence?
是的他在娱乐室
Indeed. He's in his hobby room.
进来吧我去叫他