极品老妈

Mom S02E01

Part 1 Feb. 16, 2020, 9:30 a.m.

克丽丝蒂
Christy.
去帮我个忙招待第六桌的客人
Do me a favor and bus table six.
我有点忙
I'm kind of slammed.
为什么赫特托不能去
Why can't Hector do it?
移♥民♥局退休派对
Immigration retirement party.
厨房♥一半的员工都躲在冷冻室里
Half the kitchen staff is hiding in the freezer.
知道了
Got it.
大家好[西语]
Hola.
天啊这是上好的威士忌真是浪费
Boy, that's good scotch. What a waste.
这些人什么毛病啊
What is wrong with these people?
好吧
Okay.
大错已铸成
What's done is done.
他们在冷冻室里
They're in the freezer.
你们中哪个悲催的混♥蛋♥很饥渴啊
Which one of you miserable sons of bitches is horny?
妈妈
Oh, Mom.
我刚做了最糟糕的醉酒梦
I just had the worst drunk dream.
没关系亲爱的
It's okay, baby.
乖乖帮妈妈打个结
Now, be a love, and tie Mama off.
妈妈
Mom!
什么
What?
没什么
Nothing.
只是确认一下
Just checking.
什么
What?!
极品老妈第二季第一集
感觉好真实
It seemed so real,
好像我丢弃了整整一年
like I had just thrown away my whole year.
没关系亲爱的
It's okay, honey.
就是个过失梦
It's a slip dream.
我戒酒33年了还会做这种梦
I've been sober 33 years, I still get 'em.
-真的吗 -是啊
- Really? - Oh, yeah.
几个月前
A couple months ago,
我梦见我对着汤姆·琼斯的屁♥股♥在吸毒
I dreamt I was snorting blow off of Tom Jones' ass.
汤姆·琼斯是谁啊
Who's Tom Jones?
谢谢你毁了我的美梦
Thanks for ruining a beautiful dream.
干嘛
What?
没什么只是确认一下
Nothing. Just Checking.
我说了我很抱歉
I said I was sorry.
对我来说过失梦代表着有什么事困扰着我
For me, slip dreams are a signal something's bothering me
而我没有处理它
and I'm not dealing with it.
天啊我不知道
Boy, I don't know.
我想不到有什么事困扰着我
I can't think of anything that's bothering me.
她开的车所以我要坚持这种说法
She drove, so I'm gonna stick with that.
好吧你知道吗
Okay, you know what?
也许你准备好帮助别人坚持戒酒了
Maybe you're ready to start helping somebody else stay sober.
也许我的确该回报社会了
Maybe it is time for me to start giving back.
好吧
Okay.
去跟那个新来的姑娘聊聊天
Go talk to that new girl over there.
真的吗
Ooh, really?
一开始别这么凶残行吗
Can't I start with somebody off the children's menu?
她怎么样
Okay, how about her?
那可是古琦包
Oh, that's a Gucci bag.
我真的能帮助拿着古琦包的人
I can really help somebody with a Gucci bag.
去吧
Go.
也许我也该帮助别人
Maybe I should help someone.
什么阻拦了你
What's stopping you?
说实话吗
To be honest?
我毫无同情心
A complete lack of compassion.
我是克丽丝蒂
Christy.
我是吉尔
Jill.
包真不错
Nice bag.
谢谢
Thanks.
是古琦的
It's Gucci.
我都不认识名牌货呢
I wouldn't know.
这是你第一次来参加会议吗
Is this your first meeting?
你怎么知道的
How can you tell?
无意冒犯
Well, no offense,
但你看起来像是被防暴电击枪击中了似的
but you kind of look like you just got tasered.
我觉得很煎熬
I feel terrible.
是啊我懂
Yeah, I get it.
一年多以前我也跟你
A little over a year ago I was sitting
处境相同
exactly where you are right now.
当然我穿得没你好
Of course, I wasn't dressed as nice.
实际上我记得我穿的也是这件针织衫
In fact, I think I was wearing this same sweater.
你戒酒了一整年吗
You've been sober a whole year?
是啊这一年过得...
Yep. It went by like...
这么快
tha... t.
你最近过得怎么样
So, what's been going on?
没啥大事
Not much. Um...
我酒驾了丈夫离开了我我想自杀
I got a DUI, my husband left me and I tried to commit suicide.
天啊你会很适应这里的
Oh, my God. You're gonna do great here.
我能不能当会儿贴心的妈妈啊
Can I be a mom for a moment?
当然啦
Sure.
你有多久没跟人上♥床♥了
How long's it been since you got laid?
什么
What?
谁会记那种事啊
Who keeps track of that sort of thing?
回答是六个月前那个消防队员
The answer is: six months ago, the fireman.
如果你知道为什么还要问呢
If you knew, why'd you ask?
因为我想谈我的事
Because I wanted to talk about me,
我觉得如果我假装关心你
and I thought I'd come off better
这样效果会更好
if I pretended to be interested in you.
我看见你努力了真的
I see you trying. I really do.
谢谢
Thank you.
怎么了
So, what's going on?
我好想推倒你爹
I cannot wait to bang your father.
我知道我得等到他的心脏好起来
I mean, I know I have to bide my time until his ticker's better,
但我一直都在想着开车去奇科
but all I can think about is driving to Chico
吸干♥他♥的"小池塘"
and draining him like a dirty pool.
拜托
Come on.
你在说我爸爸的丁丁
You are talking about my father's junk.
不是你在说他的丁丁
No, you're talking about his junk.
而我用了一个可爱的暗喻
I cloaked it in an adorable metaphor.
也许维奥莉特足够成熟能坦然面对
Maybe Violet is mature enough to be comfortable
她外婆的性♥欲♥
with her grandmother's sexuality.
她才没有
She's not.
除了账单还有什么吗
Anything other than bills?
是啊泰勒夫妇寄来的信
Um, yeah. Something from the Taylors.
-宝宝的照片 -拆开吧我们看看
- Ooh. Baby pictures! - Open it, let's see.
我不确定我想看
I don't know if I want to.
好吧
Oh, okay.
你没必要亲爱的
Well, you don't have to, sweetie.
我们可以讨论一下
Yeah, we can just talk about
你外婆该不该跟外公
whether your grandmommy should have violent intercourse
疯狂地做♥爱♥
with your grandpappy.
她好可爱
She's cute.
非常可爱
Very cute.
美妞儿
Beautiful.
不
Oh, no.
怎么了
What?
他们给她取名叫格温妮丝
They named her "Gwyneth."
格温妮丝怎么了
What's wrong with Gwyneth?
真的吗还得由我告诉你
Seriously? I have to tell you?
不不我明白
No, no. I get it.
瞧瞧这可爱的小兔子帽子
Oh, look at that cute little bunny hat.
你觉得这很可爱吗
You think that's cute?
我不觉得
I do not.
好吧
Okay. Well...
我觉得她已经在尽力接受了
I guess that went as good as it could've gone.
是啊
Yeah.
你想过她留下宝宝会是什么样子吗
You ever wonder what it'd have been like if she kept the baby?
别说起这件事了
Please don't go down that road.
好吧