极品老妈

Mom S01E01

Part 1 Feb. 16, 2020, 9:30 a.m.

我相信您会品尝到我们的
I think you'll find our...
那帕霞多丽葡萄酒有淡淡的香草和焦糖味
Napa Chardonnay to have hints of vanilla and caramel
入口十分爽滑
with a velvety smooth finish.
你还好吗
Are you all right?
有时欢喜有时忧
Some days are better than others.
您有心了
Thanks for asking.
这酒非常好
It's very good.
是的 2004年对这酒来说是个好年份
Yeah, 2004 was a great year for this wine.
对我来说就不怎么样了
Not so much for me.
用餐愉快
Enjoy.
您决定点蛋奶酥了吗
So, did I talk you into that souffl?
是的两份
Uh, yeah, two.
您真明智
Good call.
您不会舍得分着吃的
You won't want to share.
老天
Oh, God.
祝您生日快乐
Happy birthday to you
祝您生日快乐
Happy birthday to you
祝您生日快乐亲爱的
Happy birthday, dear...
埃塞尔
Ethel
祝您生日快乐
Happy birthday to you.
祝您年年有今日
And many more.
再加些黄油和盐
More butter and salt.
客人只需要活到把单买♥♥了就行了
They only need to live long enough to pay the check.
打蛋白要温柔些
Beat those egg whites gently...
就当它们是讨人厌的小孩子
as if they were a small, annoying child.
保罗你又着火了
Paul, you're on fire again.
克丽丝蒂你有时间吗
Um, Christy, you got a second?
我现在没空加布里埃尔
I can't talk now, Gabriel.
我在工作
I'm working.
我知道但事实是
Yeah, I know, but, uh, here's the thing.
我收到很多投诉
I-I'm getting a lot of complaints.
是吗
Really?
投诉什么
About what?
很显然有一位女服务员
Well, apparently, one of my waitresses
精神崩溃了
is having a nervous breakdown.
是珍妮弗吗
Is it Jennifer?
不是
No.
是卡罗尔吗
Is it Carol?
是你
It's you!
加布里埃尔你觉得这个是什么的味道
Gabriel, what does this taste like to you?
蘑菇吗
Uh, mushrooms?
正确的答案应该是"狗屁不如"
The correct answer was "Ass."
听我说不如你现在就下班吧
Listen, uh, maybe you should take the rest of the night off.
我不能这样做
I can't afford to do that.
我还要喂饱我家孩子呢
I have children to feed.
没问题拿几块牛排回家喂他们吧
Not a problem. Grab a couple steaks, head home and feed 'em.
你不明白
You don't understand.
我给四号♥桌的客人介绍三文鱼的时候
The guy at table four said something horrible to me
他对我讲了些难听的话
when I was telling him about the salmon.
三文鱼有什么问题
What's wrong with the salmon?
没什么三文鱼非常好
Nothing, the salmon's great.
那家伙侮辱了我
The guy insulted me.
那就没事了
Oh, that's fine.
他说了什么
What did he say?
他说我是个
He said I was...
很好的服务员
a good waitress.
这话不差啊
That's not bad.
也不对
Or true.
我的人生目标不是做一个"很好的服务员"
I didn't grow up to be a "Good waitress"
我的人生计划不是这样的
That was never the plan.
我的理想是做心理医生
The plan was to be a psychologist.
好吧
Okay.
你还年轻
You're a young woman.
依然可以实现理想
You can still do that.
对也许吧
Yeah, maybe.
可能我得先把高中念完
I'd probably have to graduate high school first.
现在我只能指望着
Now all I've got to look forward to
把60块钱一份的意大利调味饭
is serving $60 risotto
端给一帮自以为是的吃货纳粹
to a bunch of smug food Nazis.
开什么玩笑
I mean, who are we kidding?
是人都知道这只是冒热气的
It's a big, steaming
一大坨黏乎乎的米饭
pile of gooey rice!
你刚刚说什么
What did you say?
少来了鲁迪
Get over yourself, Rudy.
我看到你在麦当劳吃巨无霸
I saw you at McDonald's going down on a Big Mac.
首先纠正下我吃的是麦香鱼
First of all, it was a Filet-O-Fish.
您点什么
And for you?
我想点
Um, I'd like the, uh...
我想点
I'd like the, uh,
嫩鸡块配柠檬草和百里香
the pounded capon with, uh, lemongrass and thyme.
您真会选
Excellent choice.
您知道吧那就是被阉♥割♥的鸡
You know, that's a castrated chicken
然后用锤子一顿猛敲
they beat with a hammer.
极品老妈第一季第一集
每日警句
Daily affirmations.
我打开自己的心让美好的事物
I open my heart and allow wonderful things
进入我的生活
to flow into my life.
我打开自己的心让美好的事物
I open my heart and allow wonderful things
进入我的生活
to flow into my life.
原谅那些误解我的人
Forgiving those who have wronged me
是我送给自己的礼物
is a gift I give myself.
我女儿很随便
My daughter's an easy lay
这不是我的错
and it's not my fault.
回家啦
Hi.
对不起我吵醒你了吗
I'm sorry. Did I wake you?
没关系
That's okay.
工作怎么样
How was work?
好有趣
Oh, fun.
拿工资我心里都有些过意不去
I feel guilty taking the money.
你今晚做了什么
What'd you do tonight?
没什么
Not much.
做作业看电视
Did my homework, watched TV.
电视挂在你卧室的天花板上吗
Is there a TV on your ceiling?
什么
What?
坐下
Sit down.
我们得谈谈
We need to talk.
又想咋样
What's up?
维奥莉特我没资格对你说
Violet, I can't tell you...
你这个年纪不能做♥爱♥
not to have sex at your age,
因为我在你这个年纪就做过
because I had sex at your age.
妈妈我没有做♥爱♥
Mom, I'm not having sex.
别对为你洗床单的女人说谎
Don't lie to the woman who washes your sheets.
提醒你一下
And in case you've forgotten,
我就是在少女时怀了你
I got pregnant with you when I was a teenager.
我这样说你可千万别误会哈
And please don't take this the wrong way:
这事把我这辈子都毁了
It ruined my life.
我应该说我也爱你吗妈
I love you, too, Mom...?
我也没资格对你说不要喝酒不要抽大♥麻♥
And I can't tell you not to drink and smoke pot,
因为我的毕业纪念册上就写着
because my senior yearbook quote was:
我们喝酒抽大♥麻♥吧
"Let's drink and smoke pot"
你说完了吗
Can this please be over?
你不知道你有多幸运
You don't know how lucky you are.
我妈根本就不会费心跟我说这些
My mother never bothered to talk to me about this stuff.
-没话可说了 -宝贝我只是不想你
- Yeah, this is over. - Honey, I just don't want you
有天醒来心里难过
to wake up one day and feel bad
就因为你不是心理医生
'cause you're not a psychologist!
好的谈得很开心
Okay, good talk!
我抱你回自己的床上
Let's get you back in your own bed.
妈妈
Hi, Mom.
小宝贝
Hi, sweetie.
我在等你回来