摩登家庭

Modern Family S01E24

Part 4 Dec. 3, 2019, 1:40 p.m.

别逼米奇尔做他不想做的事
don't try to make Mitchell do something he doesn't wanna do.
闭嘴吧小卡
Oh, shut up, Cam.
好了别闹了
Okay, stop it! Stop it!
大家都听好了我真的好不容易才筹划好
Everyone, listen. This took me forever to put together,
所以我真的不在乎
so I don't really care
谁亲了谁谁额头上长了痘痘
who kissed who and who's got a pimple on her head...
或者谁穿了超级不得体的裙子
and who is wearing an outrageously inappropriate dress.
我们要打起精神假装一切正常
We are gonna get together and act like a normal family...
持续十分之一秒就行
for one-tenth of a freaking second,
现在就这么办
and we're gonna do it right now.
-快点 -别碰我
- Come on, let's go. - Get your hands off of me.
就不就不你怎样
No. No. Make me. Make me.
太荒唐了你们两个对每件事都那么纠结
Ah, this is ridiculous. You're both uptight about everything.
你不想陪他去参加婚礼
You didn't want to go to a wedding with him
就因为不愿意和别人聊天是吗
because you didn't want to make small talk?
我就是这样认识歌♥洛莉亚的
That's how I met Gloria.
还记得我对你说的第一句话吗
Do you remember the first thing I said to you?
记得 "我喜欢巧克力
Yes. "I like chocolate,
我喜欢水果但不喜欢两样加在一起"
I like fruit, but not together."
常青藤高材生你忍♥不了是吗还有你
You couldn't come up with that, lvy League? And you.
你要是不那么完美主义
You would be a lot happier if you weren't
就会活得开心得多
so obsessed with everything being perfect.
瞧瞧我们一身白什么东西板球队吗
Look at us here all in white. What are we, a cricket team?
告诉你吧生活本就不完美克莱尔
News flash. Life is not perfect, Claire.
现在都给我冷静下来
Now calm the hell down.
好吧老爸很好对你来说当然轻松
Okay, Dad, that's great, and that's really easy for you to say.
但你以为是我想这样吗
But do you think I like being like this?
并非如此
No, I don't.
所以如果你有什么良方
So if you have some quick-and-easy fix,
何不现在就说来听听
why don't you just give it to me right now?
-杰 -我的老天
- Jay! - Oh, my God.
看我的宝贝
I- I got this, baby.
不你干你干什么
No. What did- What did you do?
现在两个人都弄脏了
Now two people are dirty.
三个
Well, three.
好吧你自找的
Okay, you know what?
谁叫你说"庸俗不堪"
That's for "Kitschy."
泥巴大战
Mud fight!
别这样别别停下
No. Don't do that. No, no, no! Stop it!
大家都站好都听话别闹了
Everybody get back in line. Come on, guys, stop.
可恶你们
Damn it. Damn it! Guys!
不好意思
Excuse me.
你们到底拍不拍了
Are we still doing this?
不不拍了
No. No, we're not.
-现在拍吧 -准备好咯
- Now we are. - We're ready!
-说"茄子" -"茄子"
- Say "cheese." - Say "cheese"!
68年我在理发店扫头发的时候
Back in '68, when I was sweeping up hair in that barbershop,
我曾幻想今后自己家庭的样子
I had this mental picture of the family that,
如果够走运的话
if I was lucky enough,
有一天我会坐拥完美的妻子完美的孩子
one day I would end up with- perfect wife, perfect kids.
结果呢我没那运气
Guess what. I didn't get any of that.
最后捞到这么一群二货
Wound up with this sorry bunch.
可我每天都对此充满感激
And I'm thankful for that every day.
大部分时候吧
Well, most days.
我还是就提猫王艾维斯的事好了
I think I'm just gonna go with the Elvis stuff.
换我也会
Yeah. I would.
右边点右边点
Uh, to the right. To the right.
稍微往左一点点
A skosh to the left.
对了
There we go.
不管了反正重刷墙壁的时候
Whatever. I'm gonna have to take the picture down
还是得把这幅照片取下来的
when I repaint the wall anyhow.
-杀了我吧 -什么
- Kill me now. - What?
我真是太幸运了
Don't know how I got so lucky.
爱你
I love you.
-我喜欢这张照片 -是啊
- I love that picture. - Yeah.
-相框那里是有个缺口吗 -没有没有
- Is that a chip on the frame right there? - No. No.
-我看得到 -亲爱的
- I can see it. - Honey.