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Modern Family S01E12
Part 3
Dec. 3, 2019, 1:39 p.m.
Perfect. All right, it's just you and me then, Lily.
-小家伙怎么样 -她很好 她很好
- How's the little fortune cookie? - Ah, she-she's good. She's good.
-小卡呢 -我们吵架了
- Where's Cam? - We got into a fight.
就因为他 我家里挤满了拉丁人
Because of him, I have a house full of Latinos.
欢迎进入我的世界
Welcome to my world.
"同志天堂"也有闹矛盾的时候哈
So, trouble in gay paradise, huh?
他就是无法拒绝任何向他求助的人
He just can't say no to anybody who needs help.
你为什么总是不分场合
And why do you have to always
说什么话都要加个"同志"做限定词
add the word "Gay" Where it doesn't belong?
嘿 你别把气撒在我身上
Hey, hey, you're not mad at me.
你是在气你家那位"球形娇妻"
You're mad at the old balls and chain.
好吧老爸 谈话很愉快 再见了
Okay, Dad, good talk. See you later.
别啊 我不是有心的
Come on, I didn't mean it.
嘿 我真不是有心的 我有点不爽
Hey, I didn't mean it. I'm a little cranky.
我和歌♥洛莉亚闹得有点不愉快
I got into it with Gloria a little bit.
噢不 怎么了
Oh, no. What happened?
她讨厌巴克利
Ah, she hates Barkley.
以前你妈也老是为这些东西跟我过不去
It's the same stuff I went over with your mom all the time.
"把那船卖♥♥了""把那摩托车扔了"
"Get rid of the boat." "Get rid of the motorcycle."
要知道 我就是喜欢这些东西
You know, I liked those things.
那你为什么要扔掉
Why do you have to get rid of it then?
其实 我没扔
You know, actually, I don't.
我要把他的手粘上去 他的手断掉了
Anyway, I'm gluing his hand on over here. His hand came off.
今天真不顺啊 老爸
Rough day, Dad.
你性感年轻的娇妻不喜欢你的玩偶
Your hot, young wife doesn't like your doll.
是啊 跟你的大问题不同
Yeah, unlike your big problem,
"我男友对人太热心了"
"My boyfriend's too nice to people."
不 其实并不仅仅是这样
No, see- mmm- that's not all it is.
他喜欢帮助小动物
He helps animals.
他总是参加一些志愿活动
He's always volunteering for things.
相信我 真实情况比听起来严重多了
Trust me. It-lt's worse than it sounds.
我完全懂你 我们都面临类似的难题
Who are we kidding? We both got it pretty good.
老天 我可能和你妈较劲儿
Hell, I'm probably fighting with your mom
比我现在跟歌♥洛莉亚较劲儿还厉害
more than I'm fighting with Gloria on this thing.
小鸟从树上掉下来
A bird fell out of a tree
他会用滴眼药水的管子去喂它
and he fed it with an eyedropper.
别说了 儿子
Just drop it, kid.
我们的爱人都跟我们不一样
We're both with people different from us,
那样肯定会产生矛盾 但你想要的就是不同的人
and that's gonna create stuff, but you want different.
你妈和我各方面都很般配
Your mom and I were perfect on paper
你也知道最后的下场
and you know how that ended.
我现在拥有的要好得多
What I got now is a lot better.
当然 外人会对我们侧目非议
Sure, people look at us sometimes.
有时候我也不相信我们竟然在一起了
And sometimes even I can't believe we're together.
但我们很幸福 归根到底 夜晚来临时
But we're happy. At the end of the day
我只想回到她的身边
There's no one I'd rather come home to.
你是说歌♥洛莉亚吧
You mean Gloria.
不然还能有谁
Who else?
没谁
No one.
晚些再见了
I'll see you later.
再见 儿子
See you, kid.
你在我的海报上乱画了吗
Did you draw on my poster?
是啊 是我♥干♥的 或许下次
Yeah, I did. Maybe you'll think
你再敢读我日记 就该想想这个
about that the next time you read my journal.
我没有读你愚蠢的日记
I didn't read your stupid journal,
而且我排了好长队才弄到签名的 海莉
and I waited in line to get this signed, Haley.
别孩子气了 不过是个发型古怪的老兄罢了
Oh, don't be such a baby. It's just some dude with weird hair.
那可是玛雅·安琪洛 你个白♥痴♥
That's Maya Angelou, you idiot.
[玛雅·安琪洛是美国著名女作家和诗人]
不好意思 我不看女子篮球赛的
Oh, sorry. I don't follow the WNBA.
我告诉你 这是你做过的最缺德的事
You know what? This is the worst thing you've ever done,
我永远都不会原谅你的
and I'll never forgive you!
是你先挑起的
You started it!
-你看什么看 -我只是听到...
- What are you looking at? - Well, I just heard-
偷看海莉日记的人其实是我
I was the one who read Haley's diary.
我当时正在玩她的电脑 日记本身就是开着的
I was playing on her computer and it just opened.
好吧 是我打开的
Okay, I opened it.
但我不想她们为此争吵
But I didn't mean for anyone to fight.
噢 回来得这么快 米奇 嗨
Oh,ome already. Mitchell, hi..
-嗨 小卡 -你是忘了带票吗
- Hi, Cam. Hi. - Did you forget the tickets?
不 你不在我一个人看也不会很享受的
No. You know, I was never gonna enjoy the show without you, so-
但你那么兴奋地
Oh. But you were so excited
想带莉莉去看俄♥罗♥斯♥木偶秀
to take Lily to see the Russian marionettes.
她可能有点年纪太小了
Oh, she's probably a little young anyway.
我们可以把她放在烘干机前半小时
We can just prop her in front of the dryer for a half hour.
听着 小卡
Listen, Cam,
我很欣赏你想让世界更美好的心愿
I-I love that you try and help the world,
我很庆幸我的生命中有你的存在
and I'm very lucky to have you in my life.
噢 米奇
Oh, Mitchell.
园丁那事儿处理得怎么样了
How'd everything work out with the gardener?
很好 很好
Uh, great. Great.
原来今天是他的结婚日 他只是有点紧张
Turned out it was his wedding day, and he was a little nervous.
不过 其实你也没必要道歉
But you know what? There's no need to apologize.
不 我一定要 我太自私了
No, I need to. I've been very selfish.
不不 有时候是我热心过头了
No, no. Sometimes I take things too far.
好吧 如果那样 我会提醒你的
Okay. If that ever happens, I will let you know.
好的
Okay.
有什么原因不能让我进去吗
Is there a reason I can't go inside?
不 没 没有
No. No, no. No.
现在 我宣布你们结为夫妻
Y ahora te pronuncio hombre y esposa.
请亲吻新娘
La puedes besar.
妈 我能跟你谈谈吗
Mom, can I talk to you?
当然了 宝贝 什么事
Sure, honey. What's going on?
我对自己的所为感到很愧疚
I feel bad about something I did.
宝贝 是因为电脑那事儿吗
Oh, sweetie. Is this about the computer?
-是啊 -你看了不该看的东西吗
- Yeah. - Something you shouldn't have been looking at?
是啊 真的好古怪
Yeah. It was just so freaky.
-我看了一眼就停不下来 -我懂的 宝贝
- I couldn't stop looking. - I know, sweet pea.
-但重要的是你最终确实停下来了 -是啊
- But the important thing is you did stop looking. - Yeah.
看了一小时之后
After about an hour.
好吧 对那些东西好奇也是很正常的
Okay. Well, it's perfectly normal to be curious about these things.
有些部分很搞笑
Some parts were funny.
有些部分简直太疯狂了
And some parts just seemed crazy.
我希望你知道 有些部分并不是真的
Well, I hope you realize that some of those parts weren't real.
很显然嘛
Obviously.
但有可能完全是真的 对吧
But they can be totally real, right?
-像《安妮日记》那样 -什么
- Like Anne Frank's? - What?
我只知道 那让我老想着海莉
All I know is it really made me wonder about Haley.
真愁人 宝贝 为什么是海莉
That's disturbing, sweetie. Why Haley?
那是她的日记啊
It was her journal.
你读了我的日记 你个小变♥态♥
You read my journal? You little creep!
对不起 我没忍♥住
I'm sorry! I couldn't help it.
等等 你还读了海莉的日记
Wait. Haley's journal too?
-卢克 从今以后不准你接近电脑 -什么
- Luke, you are now banned from the computer. - What?
发生什么事了 谁惹麻烦了
What happened? Who's in trouble?
-卢克读了我的日记 -我就说不是我吧
- Luke read my journal! - I told you it wasn't me!
-我要宰了你 -海莉 冷静
- You know, I'm gonna kill you. - Haley, calm down.
等等 你都不打算吼他几句吗 那是隐私啊
Wait, you're not even gonna yell at him? That was private.
得了吧 里面最令人震惊的就是你稀烂的拼写
Oh, please. The most shocking thing in there was your spelling.
你也读过了
You read it too?
难道只有我一个人没读过吗
Am I the only one who hasn't read it?
我翻电脑查看色情图片时不小心读的
I was looking through the computers in the house for pornography.
-真恶心 -不是我要看
- Sick. - Not for me.
我想看看你们有没有"涉黄"
I wanted to see what you guys are looking at.
所以你就公然侵犯我们的隐私
So you're violating our privacy.
我发现我的孩子们
When I find out that my children...
在网上浏览裸体图片
are looking at a naked picture online,
他们就没有隐私可言了
they don't have any privacy.
-谁浏览裸照了 -那不重要
- Who was looking at naked pictures? - That doesn't matter.
不是我
I wasn't.
也不是我 真恶心 我才10岁
Wasn't me. That's gross. I'm 10!
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