杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl S02E15
Part 2
Nov. 20, 2020, 2:59 p.m.
Robot can't find clothes.
机器人找不到衣服
I do it for Kenya.
我是为了肯尼亚
Silver?!
银牌
Damn you, Zimbabwe.
该死 津巴布韦
Hello?
有人吗
Hello?
有人吗
Nice coat you got there.
不错的大衣啊
Well, I just actually wear it 'cause
是因为它能给我信心
it gives me confidence.
我才穿的
That's kind of sad.
这有点忧桑啊
You know what's really sad
真正让人忧桑的是
is that he stole the jacket.
这件大衣是他偷来的
It's not technically stealing.
不是实实在在的偷
He's still reeling from being dumped.
他还在因为被甩而难过
Aw. He's attached to it.
他还在念念不忘
Like a little bitch "bwanky."
像个小话唠"小手套"
It's not like a blanky, dude.
不是个小毛毯 哥们
It looks like a "Bwanky."
就像个"小手套"
It's not like my "bwanky."
那也不是我的"小手套"
The only reason I'm out tonight is
我今晚出来的唯一原因就是
to make sure he doesn't do anything stupid.
确保他不会做什么傻事
That's not true. I'm not gonna...
这不是真的 我不会
Shut up, Schmidt.
闭嘴 施密特
I mean, I could take care of you,
我可以照顾好你啊
if you wanted. You can what?
如果你愿意 什么
I love sad guys
我喜欢伤心男
and you seem sadder than most.
你看起来比大多数人还伤心些
I think your plan sounds okay.
我觉得你的计划不错
When you go home at night, do you look in the mirror
你晚上回到家 看着镜子里的自己
and just think, "I am the worst"?
会不会想 "我是最差劲的"
Actually yes, I do. Yeah?
实际上我会这么想 真的吗
Yeah, a lot of the times. You hate yourself?
是的 好多次了 你很恨自己吗
I definitely don't like myself.
我绝对不喜欢我自己
It's right on the line of hate.
有恨的感觉是正常的
What the hell is this?
这他妈的是怎么回事啊
I don't know how to talk to women.
我不知道如何跟女人交谈
Reason being, I feel like
原因是 我觉得
you all think that I just want one thing from you.
你们都觉得我只想从你们那获取一样东西
I want the one thing.
我想要那样东西
But a bunch of other th...
但还有其他好多事...
Can a man just want all the things?
一个男人就不能想拥有一切吗
I mean, damn.
该死的
I like a challenge.
我喜欢挑战
And you are one big challenge.
你就是个大挑战
I'm Daisy.
我是黛西
Winston.
温斯顿
Sam, it's Jess.
萨姆 是我杰茜
Please come get me.
快来瞧瞧我
I'm probably fine, but I also might be dead.
我可能没事 但也可能会死
Good-bye.
拜拜
It's Cece, leave a message.
是我希希 有事请留言
Cece, it's Jess-- call me back,
希希 是我杰茜 快给我回电啊
I'm alone in the loft.
我一个人在住处
I think there's something out...
我想外面有什么...
There's something sexy about a man who just needs me
需要我安慰的男人真是
to make him feel better.
性感爆了
I honestly need you to make me feel better.
坦白讲 我迫切需要你安慰我一下
Nicholas, your phone's ringing.
尼克拉斯 你电♥话♥响了
Not now, Schmidt!
现在不是时候 施密特
Hey, Jess. It's Jess. Schmidt, stop.
杰茜 是杰茜 施密特 别这样
You should really talk to her.
你真该跟她讲电♥话♥
Unbelievable. I am so sad.
难以置信 我太伤心了
Nicholas, you have a phone call.
尼克拉斯 你来电♥话♥了
Don't do this, Schmidt, please don't.
不要这样 施密特 请不要这样
You are the dumbest...
你个蠢货
Would you wait one second?
请等我下
I'm just... I just have to do this.
我只...我只接个电♥话♥
I'll be sad in a second. Yep.
稍后我继续伤心 没事
Hi. Hi.
你好 你好
I'm sad. Okay.
我很伤心 好吧
Uh, what is going on?
怎么啦
There's something at the door and you have to come home.
门口有奇怪的东西 你快回来
Cooler, Jess-- you are being a cooler right now.
冷静点 杰茜 请你此刻冷静一点
Seriously, I think it might be gang related.
讲真的 我觉得跟黑帮有关
I've always been worried about my blue curtains...
我一直都很担心我的蓝窗帘
Crips.
是瘸子帮
The Cri... Jess, I'm done!
瘸子... 杰茜 我没工夫陪你胡闹
Nick, I need you.
尼克 我需要你
Yeah, so this is the place.
这是我家啦
I'm really glad you're here.
你们能来我真的很高兴
The bedrooms are that way...
卧室是那个方向...
What are you doing, pal?
怎么了 姐们
Never leave me alone again.
再也表把我一人丢在家了
I'd like to introduce you to our roommate Jess.
向你介绍我们的室友杰茜
Welcome to our home.
欢迎光临寒舍
Jess, this loft has old pipes--
杰茜 这栋楼的管子极老
I've told you that a million times,
我跟你说过多少回了
but you never listen during pipe talk.
但你从来不听管子会谈
Well, pipe talk's boring.
管子会谈很无聊好不好
What is this? What is what...?
这是什么 什么
You drew my face on a melon?
你把我脸画在瓜上吗
What else was I supposed to draw your face on?
那我该把你脸画到什么上去呢
Nothing. Don't draw my face.
哪都不要画 不要画我脸
Okay.
好吧
Jess, for some reason, that girl out there,
杰茜 出于某种原因 外面那姑娘
she is sexually aroused by other people's misery.
她的性♥欲♥能被别人的悲剧激起
Do you understand the position that puts me in?
你明白我身处什么位置吗
It puts you in a really good position?
很有优势的位置
It really does. And then what happens?
千真万确 接下来会发生什么呢
Okay, I understand how, in this instance,
好的 我懂的 这种情况下
I might have cooled things off for you.
我可能会把你们兴致打下去了
Thank you for admitting that.
谢谢你肯承认
I am prepared to fix it.
我准备补偿你
'Cause, son, I'm gonna get you laid.
儿子 我会替你把到妹的
Okay, it's not how it is and never call me "son"
好吧 不是那样的 也不要叫我"儿子"
and don't talk like that.
更不要用那样的语气说话
The game is True American
玩的游戏是"铁杆美国人"
but with a sexy new twist: Clinton rules.
但要加上一条性感的扭曲规则 克♥林♥顿♥规则
Pick your interns.
选择你们的实习生吧
I don't understand the game. Uh, you're gonna be my intern.
我不很懂这个游戏 你是我的实习生
It's okay. It's stripping.
没事的 不就脱个衣嘛
It's not just stripping. It's sexy.
不仅是脱衣啊 还很性感的
Okay, so what exactly are the rules?
好吧 规则到底是什么
The floor is lava...
地板是岩浆...
They can't just make this in the same line across the new...
不能处在同一行上...
We're not doing cabinets-- no cabinets.
我们不搞内阁那一套 不要内阁
No cabinet. No cabinets.
不要内阁 不要内阁
One, two, three, four, JFK!
一二三四 肯尼迪
FDR!
罗斯福
Go, go-- that's the lava!
上啊 快上 那是岩浆啊
Down, down in the tunnel. No.
蹲下 下到隧♥道♥ 别啊
I'm the President. You're the Vice President.
我才是总统 你是副总统
Joe Biden!
乔·拜登[美国副总统]
It's Abu Nazir! Where?
是阿布纳齐尔 在哪儿呢
No, no, no, no! Spin, spin,
不是的 不是的 转圈 转圈啊
Spin, spin! Fly! Do the chicken dance!
转圈 转圈 飞起来 跳小鸡舞
No, no counter clockwise? Oh, no, no, no, no, no!
别啊 不是逆时针转圈 错了 错了 错了
Holly, you're in the Amber Waves of Grain.
霍莉 你身处琥珀晶波之中
You have to lose your jacket.
你得把你上衣脱掉了
I... Take off your jacket;
我 脱掉你的外衣
杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl
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