杰茜驾到（2011）

New Girl S02E07

Part 4 Nov. 20, 2020, 2:55 p.m.

I mean, it's a possibility from all the information
就我从网上查到的资料来看
that I've read on the Internet.
是很有可能的
That women like you
你这样的女人
are the alpha. What?
是A族啥
You're like the powerful moon, and all the women in your life
你就像是磁力强大的月球而周围所有的女人
are just latched on to your cycle.
都被你吸引绕着你转
In my case, grown-ass man.
而我就是个有女性器官的男人
Oh, yeah, good news.
我有个好消息
The gang's all here.
大家都在啊
Guys just PMS-ing?
大家都在姨妈期中吗
Not in the mood today.
今天别烦我
Don't really feel like being yelled at,
我现在一点火气都受不住
so what I'm gonna do is go ahead and leave,
脆弱得一碰就能碎
because right now I'm feeling very fragile.
所以我先撤了你们继续
I understand.
我理解
What's wrong with you?
你又怎么了
I'm no longer angry!
我再也不生气了
All the anger that used to be inside of me is gone!
我体内云聚的火气彻底消散了
It's gone, it's gone!
没了全没了
This is the worst thing I've ever seen.
简直不能再糟糕了
What is wrong with you? No.
你怎么啦别乱动
Period's got you down?
被姨妈打倒了
That is such a raw deal.
还真可怜
Want me to get you a sanitary napkin?
要我给你拿卫生棉吗
Okay, I won't get that.
好吧我不拿那个了
But you're okay with pads or tampons
那你用护垫还是卫生棉条什么的
or whatever it is that you're using?
用的还舒服吗
Tell me about your day, please.
说说你今天过的怎样吧拜托
I want to get into your universe.
我想融入你的世界
Let's rap it out. Go.
分享你的点滴开始
Floor is yours, pal.
尽情演讲吧兄弟
Talk, talk, talk.
快说快说
I want to listen.
我想听
No. 30 seconds of direct eye contact?
不要先眼神交流半分钟
Stop it, Nick. Please, stop.
够了尼克别这样
In three seconds, I'll be silent.
三秒后我就会立刻安静
One, two...
一二...
I bombed all my interviews.
我搞砸了面试
What? What happened?
怎么回事
I was sabotaged by my baby box,
童年阴影摧毁了我
which means I'm never gonna trust anything that comes out of it.
我再也没法相信任何人了
So that rules out a family.
也就再没希望成家了
I know just the thing you need.
我有个极品秘诀能帮到你
Come with me.
跟我来
Welcome to the wonderful world of water massage.
欢迎来到水浴按♥摩♥的美好世界
You are a piece of seaweed.
你是一片海藻
You are totally happy.
你非常快乐
I don't mean to touch your boobs! You're touching my boobs!
我不是想摸你的胸你就是在摸
I don't mean to touch your boobs!
我没想摸
Fail, fail, fail.
不行不行
The next move is...
接下去...
Oh, my...!
我的...
Relaxing is important. Relaxing is important.
放松很重要放松很重要
Relax!
放松
Oh, no.
不
What are you trying to do?!
你想干什么
Kill me?!
杀了我吗
It worked for me.
对我很奏效啊
I was trying to help you.
我是想帮你
I've been watching you doubt yourself for months.
这几个月来你总在怀疑自己
I'm not doubting myself.
我才没有
You're doubting yourself, Jess.
你在怀疑自己杰茜
No, Nick, it's PMS.
不尼克都是因为大姨妈
It's not PMS.
不是因为大姨妈
You got knocked down.
你被打击到了
It's time to get back up.
现在是重整旗鼓的时候了
And get up long enough for one of these bozos to hire you.
振作起来让那些蠢家伙雇用你
I believe in you.
我相信你
So does that guy.
他也是
Think you can do that?
你觉得自己能做到吗
And if you don't, I'm gonna water massage you again.
要是不行我就再给你来一次水浴按♥摩♥
Can you do that? Yes.
能做到吗能
Can you do that?
能做到吗
Yes!
能
Jessica Day?
杰茜卡·戴
Yes, I'm here. Weren't you here the other day?
我在你是不是之前来过一次了
Weren't you here the other day?
你之前不也来过这儿吗
Yes, I was.
没错我来过
Well, I signed it. Please note the added provision.
我签了但请注意附加条款
In any autobiographical account of my life,
在我的任何自传性记叙里
you want to be referred to as Moises Perdue.
必须称你为莫伊斯·普度
Non-negotiable.
没有商量余地
But you're fine with the rest of it?
其他的你都接受吗
Look, I'm a depraved freak,
我就是个堕落的变♥态♥
and I want to wander into your Narnia of sexual terror
只想潜入你那恐怖的性♥爱♥乐园
and emerge like a freshly birthed calf.
如同新生儿一般尽情享受
Put your hands out.
手伸出来
Let's do this.
我们开始吧
Are you ready?
准备好了吗
I'm ready. All right.
好了
Oh, yeah.
好的
Okay.
好吧
Interesting technique.
真是有趣的道具
Hold tight.
举好了
I mean, I could totally get out of this.
这也太松了吧
What, have you never bound somebody before?
你以前绑过别人吗
I got to start over.
我得重新绑
This your first time?
这是你第一次
Are you rejecting me?
你要拒绝我吗
No, I-- no.
不我...
I mean...
我是说
Because legally... you can't.
从法律上说你已不能拒绝
Now take off your pants.
把裤子脱了
Okay.
好
Now.
快点
I got it. I got it.
我能解开
Right there. Oh.
马上就
No, I got it.
不我可以
Hold on, I got it.
稍等马上就
I did it. I did it.
脱了脱了
Ladies and gentlemen,
女士们先生们
drumroll please.
来点鼓声
Cut! Cut, Nick!
给我停下尼克
Snare drum.
小军鼓
I shouldn't have to specify.
这都要我特意说吗
Jess, that was a cymbal. Cymbals are part of the drum kit.
杰茜你敲的那是钹钹也是鼓的一种嘛
Nevertheless, we are gathered here today to celebrate
无论如何今天我们相聚于此
the reemployment of Jessica F. Day.
庆祝杰茜卡·F·戴重新找到工作
Not my middle initial. Who will once again
我中名不是F 重出江湖
be in the classroom, molding the minds of children.
回到课堂为孩子们构建思维
Actually, I'm gonna be remolding the minds of grown-ups,
事实上这次我是要为成年人重建思维
'cause I'm gonna be teaching creative writing to adults.
我要给成年人上创意写作课
So, what, are you gonna be, like,
所以你要怎样
reading a bunch of weirdos' writing?
读一堆变♥态♥写的文章吗
Well, I hope you like stories about vampires
希望你喜欢看吸血鬼的故事
and bad childhoods something. I do.
还有阴暗童年什么的我喜欢
You're gonna get them. In any case,
你能搞定的不管怎样
I think I speak for all of us when I say that we are thrilled
我代表所有人愉快地宣布
that you will once again have a reason to shower daily.
你又能享受每日淋浴的快♥感♥了
Yes.
太棒了