极品老妈

Mom S07E15

Part 3 Feb. 23, 2020, 9:06 a.m.

原来那只是喝咖啡不是约会
Turns out it was coffee, not a date.
很遗憾我也经历过
Oh. Sorry. Been there.
有次我以为我在约会
Once, I thought I was on a date,
但原来那是看牙医
but turns out it was a dentist appointment.
很明显韦恩只想当朋友
Well, obviously, Wayne just wants to be friends.
甘恩医生只想让我用牙线
Dr. Gann just wanted me to floss.
但我还以为韦恩是过来看你的
But I-I thought that Wayne came here to see you?
不他是来出差的
No, he's here on business.
是我夸张了
I'm the one who built it up
因为我是个荒唐的老女人
because I'm a ridiculous old woman.
我不喜欢我妈妈这样叫你
I don't like it when my mother calls you that,
也不喜欢你这样叫自己
and I don't like it when you do it.
我从来没有这么丢脸过
I've never been so humiliated.
真的吗
Really?
因为有好几年你的地址都是
'Cause, for a couple of years, your address was
"纸箱子"
"Cardboard box."
好吧这次的丢脸程度排第二
All right, well, this was a close runner-up.
但是有个好消息
Here's the good news:
你为某人觉得激动
you got excited about someone,
这就意味着你准备好重返情场了
which means you are ready to get out there.
这就意味着你会重返情场
And that means you're gonna get out there,
而且会找到爱人
and that means you're gonna find someone.
知道吗
You know what?
我一个人其实挺好
I'm really fine being alone.
在这方面我跟你很像
I'm a lot like you in that way.
我试图吻我的牙医
I tried to kiss my dentist.
你觉得我一个人挺好吗
You think I'm fine being alone?
你在看什么呢
What you watching?
我的房♥子
My house.
它什么情况
What's it doing?
我家来了很多宴会承办人花商和快递员
It's bustling with caterers and florists and delivery guys,
因为你妈
and now, because of your mother,
我无法停止纠结他们可能偷了什么
I can't stop obsessing over what they might be stealing.
他们没偷东西而是在工作
They're not stealing. They're working.
我已经看到一个人
Mm. Already saw one guy help himself
从我的冰箱拿了个冰淇淋三明治开吃了
to an ice cream sandwich from my freezer.
好笑的是你先生
Joke's on you, sir.
那是两年前用大♥麻♥牛奶做的
Those are two years old and made with hemp milk.
别在我的地板上吐口水
Hey, don't you spit that on my floor.
那石头能渗透
That stone is porous!
不好
Oh, no.
-怎么了 -韦恩来了
- What? - Wayne's here.
我跟他说了互助会的事
I told him about this meeting.
没想到他会来
I didn't think he'd come.
那是你的韦恩吗
That's your Wayne?
他很帅
He's hot.
是啊他是我柏拉图式的帅气朋友
Yeah. He's my hot, platonic friend.
那不是约会
Wasn't a date.
-韦恩 -玛乔丽
- Hi, Wayne. - Hey, Marjorie.
我给你留了我身边的位置
I, uh, saved you a seat next to me.
抱歉我总是和闺蜜一起坐
Oh. Sorry, I always sit with my girls.
这些是我的闺蜜
These are my girls.
打个招呼吧闺蜜们
Say hi, girls.
你好
Hi.
你们好
Hi, girls.
玛乔丽过来
Marjorie, come here.
我想介绍你认识一个人
There's a guy I want you to meet.
别帮我
Don't help me.
请赐予我智慧分辨这两者的区别
...and the wisdom to know the difference.
韦恩很高兴再次见到你
Well, Wayne, it was great to see you again.
祝你一路顺风
Safe travels.
实际上我想知道
Actually, I was wondering
你互助会后要做什么
what you were doing after the meeting.
我喝够咖啡了
Oh, I think I've had enough coffee.
那晚我很抱歉
Look, I'm sorry about the other night.
我也希望更进一步但是
I really wanted it to be more, but...
我害怕了
I got cold feet.
是吗
You did?
是的我妻子一年半前去世了
Yeah, my wife died a year and a half ago.
有时候感觉时间很长
Sometimes it feels like a long time.
有时候感觉并非如此
Sometimes it really doesn't.
我能理解
Ooh, I understand that.
我40年没约会了所以我
And I haven't been on a date for 40 years, so I...
我不知道我在做什么
I have no idea what I'm doing. u202d
你为什么不告诉我
Well, why didn't you tell me?
因为我40年没约会了
Because I haven't been on a date for 40 years.
我腿软了
And the feet-- cold.
现在你的腿感觉怎么样
How are the feet feeling now?
想再试试吗
Want to give it another try?
我很乐意
Yeah, I-I would like that.
玛乔丽
Hey, Marjorie.
那边有个人在问我要你的号♥码
This guy over there is asking me for your number. So... u202d
告诉他谢谢你
Well, tell him thank you,
但韦恩和我要去共进晚餐了
but Wayne and I are going out to dinner.
天啊太棒了
Oh, my God, that's so great.
压根没有什么人
There's no guy.
真好你还在
Oh, good. You're still here.
我正准备走得确保
I was just leaving. Got to make sure
我的酒保不会偷我的珠宝多亏了你
my bartender doesn't steal my jewelry, thanks to you.
请稍等一会
Please, just give me one minute.
你去哪里了你没参加互助会
Where were you? You missed the meeting.
我从旧金山回来时堵车了
I got caught in traffic driving back from San Francisco,
我在那里找到了
where I was able to track down
一些非常相似的银餐具
some very similar pieces of silverware--
没那么老但也不是新的
not as old but not new--
绝对是某人祖母的东西
that definitely belonged to someone's grandmother,
我希望你能接受我非常抱歉
which I hope you will accept with my deepest apologies.
天啊你真是费尽周折邦妮
Boy, you went to a lot of trouble, Bonnie.
吉尔邦妮是不是费尽周折
Jill, didn't Bonnie go to a lot of trouble?
抱歉我试过了
Sorry. I gave it a shot.
拜托请你收下吧
Come on. Please take it.
谢尔比你刚搬了新家对吗送你的
Shelby, you just moved into a new place, right? Enjoy.
还我
Hey. Give that back.
意大利脆饼去吧
Biscotti... go.
法式炖蛋去吧
Crème brûlée... go.
无面粉巧克力蛋糕等等
Flourless chocolate cake... hold!
去吧
Go.
快点
Go, go, go!
上帝我知道你也许有更重要的事要做
Oh, God, I know you probably have more important things to do,
但是拜托你让我撑过甜点和咖啡
but please just get me through dessert and coffee
并且跟我忘记名字的人道别
and saying goodbye to people whose names I forgot.
你在这里啊
There you are.
梅兰妮一切还好吗
Melanie. Is everything okay?
吉尔委员会选择你来主持这个活动时
You know, Jill, when the committee selected you to host this event,
我有过怀疑
I had my doubts,
我还激烈地表达了
which I expressed passionately.
是啊你发信息说过了
Yeah. You included me on the text.
我只是很难想象这不是一场灾难
I just had a hard time imagining this not being a disaster.
但是瞧瞧你还穿着衣服
But look. You're still dressed,
没人踩着你的呕吐物滑倒
and no one slipped in your vomit.
我真棒
Yeah, yay for me.
我已经不再是那样的人了
And... I'm not that person anymore.
是的
No, you're not.
我不能再根据过去的你而评判你
And I need to stop judging you on who you used to be.
谢谢你这意义重大
Thank you. That means a lot.
空出四月的时间
Clear your April,
艾滋病和白血病筹款会都要来了
'cause we've got AIDS and leukemia coming up.
安排上一个我就激动万分了
Oh, I'd be thrilled to get either!
真棒老娘回归了宝贝
Yes! I am back, baby.
你好
Oh. Hello.