迈克和茉莉（2010）
Mike & Molly S03E01
Part 2
Dec. 15, 2020, 2:45 p.m.
Sure.
确实
Man, that was some impressive police work back there.
卧♥槽♥ 刚刚你执行任务时真是太牛逼了
The way you apprehended that perp,
你逮捕制♥服♥犯罪嫌疑人那时
it could've gotten real ugly.
当时场面真的很难收拾
Well, the boy was sorry,
当然 那男孩儿道歉了
and he did give the Silly Putty back to the cashier.
而且他也把橡皮泥归还给售货员了
You showed a lot of restraint.
你当时真是相当的克制啊
11-year-old punk calls me a butthole,
要是有11岁的毛小子敢叫我屁♥眼♥
you're gonna see it on the 6:00 news.
我肯定让他上6点的新闻
Just doing my job.
我只是做分内的事情而已
You're too modest.
你太谦虚了
You are, without a doubt, the finest police officer
毫无疑问 你是我一起开心的搭档过的
I've ever had the pleasure of working with.
最棒的警♥察♥了
Well, I'm sure your partner's no slouch.
我确定你的搭档也一定不是个懒散的人
He ain't nothing but a slouch.
他除了懒一无是处
Gone for two weeks, and not one word.
走了两周了 一点音讯都没有
I even put a prepaid phone card inside a Hershey bar,
我甚至给Hershey手♥机♥里装了预付款的电♥话♥卡
so I know he found it.
这样确保他能联♥系♥到我
Well, you got to cut him a little slack... it is his honeymoon.
你让他放松放松吧 他现在在渡蜜月
Which he wouldn't be on if it wasn't for me.
要不是我他跟谁去渡蜜月
I was the Cupid that made that relationship happen.
我可是他们两个的爱神丘比特
And it took about a dozen arrows.
我可是射了不少的箭
Like taking down Moby-Dick with thumbtacks.
难度跟用图钉把鲸鱼Moby-Dick按倒一样
The guy in that Saturn's driving a little erratically.
开土星汽车的家伙乱开车
I'm gonna run his plates.
我要给他点颜色看看
Listen to you!
你自己听听
You're "Gonna run his plates."
你要给他颜色看看
You are the real deal, Officer.
你可是来真的 警官
Damn fine cop.
真他喵的好条子
You'd call me from your honeymoon, wouldn't you?
你渡蜜月的时候会给我打电♥话♥吧?
: Excuse me. Excuse me.
抱歉 抱歉
Could I have some more warm nuts?
能不能给我上点热果仁
Absolutely. And, uh,
当然可以 还有
I-I noticed that the guy across the aisle
我发现过道对面的人
slept through his cookie.
吃饼干睡过去了
Is that... is that up for grabs?
能不能 拿过来给我吃
I'll see what I can do.
我尽力吧
Believe it or not, I've never flown
不管你信不信 我以前从来没
first class before.
坐过头等舱
But between you and me, I am hooked.
但悄悄告诉你 我太喜欢了
I'll be back with zee warm nuts.
我等会儿送热果仁过来
And-and the cookie.
还有饼干
: Don't forget that cookie.
别忘了饼干
God, I love first class!
天 我爱死头等舱了
It's like a fancy restaurant where you can sleep.
跟高档酒店一样让人可以安然入睡
Well, somebody looks mighty cute in his complimentary jammies.
赠送的睡衣某人穿着可是特别的可爱哦
Can you believe it? One size really does fit all.
你相信么 一个尺码的什么人都能穿上
Boy, I hate leaving France.
天 我真不想离开法国
Oh, me, too.
噢 我也是
Quaint little shops, the architecture,
古雅的小店 建筑风格
the museums...
还有博物馆
And how about the bidet? Right?!
更别提坐浴盆了 是吧
I mean, the best invention ever.
简直是世界上最棒的发明了
It's so much more civilized.
多么文明先进
I don't know how I'm ever gonna go back to using toilet paper.
我都不知道回去怎么用厕纸了
Well, just for the record, you are.
从以往经验来看 你本来就不会用
Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm just saying,
好吧 好吧 我就说说
it's the difference between a babbling brook and a pinecone.
就跟多嘴的女人和松果的差别一样
True.
实话
I mean, there's a reason you soak the plates before you wipe 'em.
就跟你在刷碗前总是先舔一遍一样
All right.
你赢了
Good talk.
说得真好
Wow, the honeymoon is really over.
哇哦 蜜月真要结束了
It was like a dream.
跟做梦一样
Now it's back to the old grind.
要回到原来的苦日子了
Well, I'm not looking forward to going back, either.
我也是不想回去
Mom and Victoria without adult supervision for two weeks?
妈妈和Victoria 两个人两周时间都没有大人看着
I'm guessing the whole house is empty wine bottles
我猜现在房♥子里满是水
floating in bong water.
上面漂着空酒瓶子
And cats.
和猫
I don't know why, but I just keep picturing a ton of street cats.
我不知道为什么 但我满脑子想象的都是流浪猫
Victoria, sweetie, breakfast is ready.
Victoria 宝贝 早饭做好了
Coming, Mommy!
这就来了 妈咪
Oh! Don't you look pretty!
哦 你看你多漂亮
Not too slutty for work, is it?
穿这样上班不算暴露吧
Molly says it makes my breasts look like
Molly说穿这样显得我的胸就好像
two pumpkins rolling off a porch.
从走廊上滚下来的两个南瓜
She says the same thing about my thong underwear
每次我出门去拿报纸的时候
every time I go out to pick up the newspaper.
她也这么说我的丁字裤
Where are the coffee cups?
咖啡杯在哪
One shelf up.
上一个隔板
I moved the wineglasses
我把酒杯都下移
down to eye level.
到视线水平位置了
Molly tries to put them out of my reach.
Molly把它们都放在我够不到的地方
She forgot I took that rock climbing class.
她忘记我上过攀岩课了
Morning, ladies.
早上好 女士们
Morning! Morning!
早啊 早上好
Boy, I just had the best shower.
天 我算是洗了个舒服澡
Without Mike in the house, you don't have to worry
Mike不在 我都不用担心
about getting scalded from his 7:00 a.M. Double flush.
早上七点洗澡水忽冷忽热的烫人
I just like being able to walk in the bathroom
我终于可以走进卫生间
without a gas mask and a canary.
不用带防毒面具和金丝雀了
And would you look at this! Leftover cheesecake.
你们快看 吃剩下的奶酪蛋糕
Has anyone living in this house ever uttered those words.
我刚说的话 从来没在这房♥子里听到过
God, how many times have I come down here
天 有多少回我下楼来
to find Mike in the dark standing at the fridge
发现黑暗中Mike站在冰箱前面
like a raccoon caught digging in the trash can?
就跟被逮到翻垃圾桶的浣熊一样
Up on his hind legs, chicken bone in his mouth,
撅着屁♥股♥ 嘴里叼着鸡骨头
with those two little red eyes glaring at you.
用发红的小眼睛盯着你看
I mean, I love them both,
我爱他们
but it's kind of been a honeymoon for all of us.
但是着就跟我们大家的蜜月一样
Hey, why don't we celebrate our last day of freedom
嘿 我们一起买♥♥上一大桶啤酒
with a nice pitcher of mimosas?
庆祝这最后一天的自♥由♥吧
Why not! I'm guessing it's Sunday somewhere.
好啊 就好像过周日一样
Now, that's convenient.
这下方便多了
Right? Thank you!
我说吧 谢谢
Mmm...
嗯...
Oh...
哦...
Sweetie,
宝贝
are you still awake?
你还没睡啊
You need to get some sleep.
赶紧睡觉吧
Look at that map.
你看这个地图
That's our plane.
这个是我们的飞机
In four inches, we'll be back in Chicago.
再有四英寸 我们就回到芝加哥了
You know, we're gonna take other trips.
我们以后还会旅游的
Once, you know, we pay off this one,
只要我们付清这次旅游
and... and buy a house
和买♥♥♥房♥♥的欠款
and pay off my student loans...
再付清我学生的贷款
Your what? Nothing.
你什么? 没啥
I don't know why we have to go back.
我不知道为啥我们还要回去
I mean, what's stopping us from hopping on another plane
为什么我们不直接上另一架飞机
and going anywhere we want.
去我们想去的地方
Well, I'm out of frequent flyer miles,
可是 我已经没有飞行里程数了
and you can't buy plane tickets with cheese.
你又不能用奶酪买♥♥机票
We don't need money.
我们不需要钱
You're a teacher; I'm a cop.
你是老师 我是警♥察♥
We can do that anywhere.
我们在哪都能干这行
We can barely do it in Chicago.
我们在芝加哥干这个都够呛
Just go to sleep.
乖乖睡吧
I've been sleeping my whole life.
我已经睡得够多了
迈克和茉莉（2010）
Mike & Molly
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