迈克和茉莉（2010）

Mike & Molly S03E17

Part 1 Dec. 15, 2020, 2:51 p.m.

You really got to stay like that
你真要为了怀孕
for ten minutes, in order to get pregnant?
保持那个姿势10分钟吗
Supposedly it gets the salmon spawning
我得要让你的鲑鱼们
in the right direction.
游去正确的地方
I can only do it for eight minutes, though.
不过我只能保持8分钟
I've got to shave my legs before work.
我还得在上班之前刮腿毛
You don't have to tell me, cactus calves.
你不需要告诉我仙人掌
I got stubble burn on my back.
我背上的毛茬还疼着呢
Wow!
哇
The honeymoon is officially over, isn't it?
蜜月真的结束了是吧
Where are you going? To make some breakfast.
你去哪做早餐
I'll scramble my eggs while you're fertilizing yours.
在你给你的"蛋"施肥的时候煎我的蛋
No, sit down and talk to me.
不坐下和我说会儿话
These are your boys I'm giving a ride on the water slide.
这可是你的"儿子们"在我的"滑道上"
Sweetie, you're ovulating for the next 36 hours.
亲爱的接下来36个小时你都在排卵
That's a long time in the car together.
这可是个漫长的旅程
We can't stop at every Stuckey's. Stay.
我们总不能每站都停吧待着
Fine, but just a warning:
好不过警告一下
I used up most of my witty banter during foreplay.
在前戏的时候我把我的幽默都给用完了
So your idea of witty banter and foreplay
所以在你看来你的幽默和前戏
was kicking your slippers off and saying,
就是把拖鞋踢掉然后说
"Okay, let's do this thing. Papa needs a paycheck."
"来吧开搞爹地要挣钱"
Hey, it got your motor running, didn't it?
嘿我让你很激动不是吗
Baby sex, ovulators can't be choosers.
造人性♥爱♥ 排卵的人可不能挑三拣四的
It'll all be worth it when I see you holding
等抱着我们的结晶的时候
our beautiful young'un in your arms.
这一切都是值得的
You're going to be the greatest dad.
你会是最好的爸爸
And listen, I don't care if we have a boy or a girl.
听着不管是男孩还是女孩
Either way, they're going to be pitching for the Cubs.
他都得去球队里面投球去
Or dancing for the Joffrey.
或者在杰佛瑞芭蕾舞团跳舞
Long as they're healthy and happy.
只要他们一直健康开心就好
And have your cute little button nose.
而且像你一样有可爱的纽扣鼻
I love you, Mike Biggs. I love you, Molly Flynn.
我爱你 Mike Biggs 我爱你 Molly Flynn
All right, good talk.
好了聊得不错
I'll see you at 6:00.
6点见
Don't be late.
别迟了
I've got papers to grade.
我还要批改作业呢
I'm telling you, man.
我跟你说
This St. Patty's Day is going to be the best ever.
这次圣帕特里克节会是最好的一次
Better than the year and you got drunk,
比那年你喝醉了
painted yourself green and then tried to
把自己刷成绿色还试图
French kiss the police horse?
和警马法式湿吻那次还好么
Hey, man, I was feeding Clip-Clop a carrot.
嘿我是在给Clip-Clop喂胡萝卜
All right, and those pictures
好吗那些照片
made that look a lot weirder than it really was.
真让这看起来怪怪的
You took advantage of a hungry horse, Carl.
你占了一匹饥饿的马的便宜 Carl
Neigh means neigh.
马嘶声就是惨叫声
Joke if you want,
想嘲笑就嘲笑吧
but that's what St. Patty's Day is all about:
但是这就是圣帕特里克节的精髓所在
Free-spirited revelry.
自♥由♥奔放的狂欢
Some might say "Unbridled."
有些人会说"放纵的"
By the way, uh, are you two seeing each other again,
顺便问一下你们俩后面还见面了吗
or has she moved on to greener pastures?
还是她已经搬去更绿的牧场了
Oh, that reminds me, I got to pick up a keg
哦这提醒我了我得
of green beer for my party.
为我的派对买♥♥桶生啤
And talk to my pinata guy to see if he can do a leprechaun.
还要去找卖♥♥彩饰陶罐的看他能不能做个爱尔兰小妖精
Wow, you're really going all out for this thing, aren't you?
哇你真的要彻底的过这个节是吧
Hey, this is my first official blow-out
嘿这可是在我新家
in my new apartment.
办的第一次盛大的宴会
People are going to be talking about this soirée
大家会谈论这场宴会
for years to come.
好几年呢
Well, I'll have to read about it in the papers,
好吧我会去关注一下报纸
or, next month's Horse Quarterly.
或者下个月的骏马季刊
Wait, now you're not coming?
等等你不过来吗
But I already bought enough bags
但是我已经买♥♥了足够
of green M&Ms to dam up a levee.
砌个防洪堤那么多的绿色M&M巧克力
I was prepared for Hurricane Mike.
我可是特意为飓风Mike准备的
I'm sorry, Carl, something came up.
对不起 Carl 但是我有事
No, but you've known about this for two weeks
不你不是两个星期前就知道这个宴会了吗
and all of the sudden you ju...
然后突然你就
Oh, wait, Molly's ovulating, isn't she?
哦对了 Molly的排卵期是吧
And on St. Patty's Day.
而且还是在圣帕特里克节那天
Funny how her eggs never drop
真不知道她的卵子怎么不在
when she's got tickets to Mamma Mia!
她拿到<妈妈咪呀>的票那天排出来
Why don't you just do a hit and run?
为什么你不做完就走呢
You guys are married, she knows you're coming back.
你们都结婚了她知道你会回去的
Ovulation days aren't just "One and done," Carl.
排卵日不是"做完就走"能行的 Carl
It's a marathon.
那是场马拉松
By the time it's over,
在结束的时候
I won't be able to form a sentence
我都说不出完整的话
or pull up my pants.
拉不起我的裤子了
Hey, this St. Patty's Day
嘿这可是圣帕特里克节
I'm going to be the exact same way.
最后我也会和你一模一样
And that right there is what made that horse picture
这就是造成那张有马的照片
really weird.
无比奇葩的原因
"My ears have not drunk a hundred words
"吾耳未闻"
"Of thy tongue's uttering,
"汝之百词"
"Yet I know the sound.
"虽吾知此声"
"Art thou not
"汝非"
Romeo a Mont-a-cue?"
"罗密欧蒙太古氏也"
"Neither, fair saint, if either thee dislike."
"非也吾之爱人若汝不喜"
Okay, what did we just say to each other?
刚刚我们说的什么东西
You just asked if I was Romeo, and I said,
你刚刚问我是不是罗密欧然后我说
"Yeah, unless it's a deal breaker""
是的除非这个名字会让你和我吹了
I don't understand a word of it.
我一个字都不懂
It might as well be in Mexican.
还不如墨西哥语呢
Well, Elizabethan poetry does sound pretty Mexican-y
伊丽莎白时期的诗歌♥听起来是有点墨西哥味
until you get used to it.
等你习惯就好了
I appreciate you helping me with my homework, Harry.
我非常感激你能帮我完成作业 Harry
You know, I'm not so much "Book smart"
你知道的我对书从来没有感觉
as "Magazine smart."
倒是对杂♥志♥感兴趣一点
Don't sell yourself short.
别看扁自己了
You're an ethereal, inquisitive soul
你是一个愉悦欢腾
with a palpable effervescence.
飘渺优雅的好奇灵魂
Okay, what'd you just say?
呃你刚刚说的什么
I said, "You're pretty neat."
我说 "你很优雅"
Oh, thanks.
哦谢谢
You're neat, too.
你也很优雅
"How cam'st thou hither, tell me, and wherefore?
"汝如何至此缘何至此"
"The orchard walls
"庭院之墙"
are high and hard to climb..."
"高不可攀"
"And the place death, considering who thou art,
"若吾之亲见汝至此"
if any of my kinsmen find thee here."
"必取汝之性命矣"
That's what it says right here.
书上真是这样写的
How did you do that?
你怎么知道的啊
Well, the... balcony scene from Romeo and Juliet.
<罗密欧和朱丽叶>那场阳台戏
I'm an English lit major
我主修的是英国文学
and Shakespeare's kind of my "Thang."
莎士比亚是我的专长
I have a test tomorrow and if it wasn't for Harry here...
我明天有个测试要不是Harry在这
me thinks I'd be screwed.
吾以为会搞砸的
Oh, so you're an aficionado of The Bard, are you?
所以你是个谜一样的吟游诗人是吧
Well, I received his collected works
在我12岁生日那年
for my 12th birthday and read every volume, cover to cover.
我收到了莎士比亚的全集然后读了一遍又一遍
Well... like I always tell my students,
就像我和我学生说的
reading is one thing, but understanding is another.
读是一回事理解又是另外一回事了
I did understudy Mercutio at the Shawnee Summer Theater.
我比较明白肖尼夏季剧院的莫西多的角色
And I got to perform one matinee when his eczema flared up.
而且我还在日场演了一次他爆发湿疹
Have you ever played any of the female roles?
你有演过什么女性角色吗
See, in Shakespeare's time,
你看在莎士比亚时期
the men played all the roles.
男人演所有的角色