迈克和茉莉（2010）
Mike & Molly S03E17
Part 3
Dec. 15, 2020, 2:51 p.m.
Lord willing.
上帝保佑
Here you go, sport.
给你的 小子
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
圣帕特里克日快乐
Odd bunch, the Irish.
爱尔兰人真是奇怪
I don't trust anyone who dances without their arms.
我不相信任何跳舞不用手的人
I probably shouldn't imbibe.
我还是不喝的好
I'm Victoria's designated driver for the party tonight.
今晚的派对我是Victoria的专职司机
Still swinging the bat, huh, Bubbles?
还在对她摇摆不定么 心存幻想
Do you not own any mirrors at your house?
你家里就没有镜子么
What are you talking about?
你在说什么啊
You're a dumpy load and she's smokin' hot.
你只是一个矮冬瓜 而她却如此的性感
Please, don't make me say it outright.
拜托 不要让我说得太直接了
We're just study buddies, nothing more.
我们只是在一起学习 没别的
Hey, I admire your angle.
嘿 我倒是很赞赏你的角度
I taught a broad to golf once,
我上次教一个胖子打高尔夫
ended up nailing her in the sand trap.
最后把她钉在了沙坑里了
I'm just helping out a friend,
我只是在帮一个朋友的忙
you horrible, horrible man.
你这个无比邪恶的人
Yeah, yeah, sticks and stones.
好吧 随你怎么说
Let me explain it to you in simple geometry.
让我来通俗地解释给你听
A guy shaped like you
一个长得像你一样的人
will never bag a woman shaped like that.
永远也别想泡上一个像她一样的妹子
At least I have hair.
但至少我有头发
Whoa... man, take it easy.
伙计 别动怒
I got feelings.
我也是有自尊的
Oh! How'd you do?
噢 怎么样啊
B-minus.
B-
It is the best grade I have ever gotten.
这是我得到的最好的成绩了
I told you, if you studied and applied yourself,
我就说过嘛 要是你自己学了实践了
you could do anything, Victoria.
你能干好任何事 victoria
Wow.
哇噢
You kissed me. I did.
你亲了我一下 正是
I gotta go.
我得走了
Well, wait...
呃 等等
I thought we were gonna go to the party.
我以为我们还要去派对呢
Wha-What just happened?
刚 刚发生什么了
Your frog didn't turn into a prince.
青蛙并没有变成王子
He just hopped away.
然后他就蹦走了
'Sup, player.
干杯 伙计
There's another whole keg of that green beer
在浴缸里还有一整桶这种
on ice in the bathtub.
加冰的绿啤酒呢
Man, this party's starting to heat up nice.
哥们儿 这派对慢慢开始有气氛了
Yeah, it's simmering to a boil.
哇 要开始沸腾了
Mm-hmm.
嗯
And yet, as I gaze around the room,
但是呢 当我抬头环视房♥间的时候
something seems to be missing
发现好像漏了什么东西
from this festive motif.
对这欢乐的主题来说
Well, go put on that leprechaun outfit I bought you.
嗯 那就穿上那就我送你的妖精服吧
I was actually referring to the complete absence
其实我说的是这少了什么
of anything even resembling a female.
哪怕一个雌性生物也没有
Hey, man, women don't show up at parties this early.
嘿 伙计 女人们才不会这么早就出现在派对上呢
Okay, they're too busy primping
好吗 她们正在精心打扮
and getting themselves beautiful for us.
好漂漂亮亮的面对我们
Seriously?
真的吗
Absolutely. I mean, you don't want
当然啦 我是说 你肯定不希望
a bunch of half- put-together skanks
一群装扮不周的臭婆娘
straggling up into our home, do you?
在我们的房♥子里游荡 对吧
At this point, I would settle for skanks.
就现在这情况 臭婆娘我也要了
I can always just drink more.
喝多点我就看不清了
Just relax.
放松
Women love to make a grand entrance.
女人们喜欢来一个宏大的入场
Yup. And you and me?
而对你和我呢
We got home field advantage.
我们有主场优势
How so? We live here,
怎么说 我们就住这儿
so we the only ones that got beds.
只有我们有床
Ah.
耶
Speaking of which, there's a large man
说到这事 有个大个子
watching TV on yours with his shoes off.
脱了鞋坐在你床上看电视呢
Damn it, man.
我靠啊
And I just Febreze'd my comforter!
我才在被子里放了除臭剂的
'Sup, player.
干杯 伙计
No worries.
不要担心
Very soon, this place will be crawling with skanks.
不久后这儿就会躺着不少花姑娘了
In fact, one year, I woke up under the bar
其实 有一年 我在一个酒吧里醒来
in this exact position.
就正是这个姿势
You know, feel free to save
这些故事还是留一些
some of these stories for my deathbed.
等我临终的时候讲吧
Knock, knock. Are you guys decent?
敲门 你俩方便不
I am, and I thought she was.
我没问题 我认为她也没问题
Hey, Mike, have you heard from Harry?
嘿 Mike 你有Harry的消息么
We're supposed to go to Carl and Samuel's party together.
我们本来说好了一起去Carl和Samuel的派对的
You realize we're gonna be the only ones not there?
你意识到我们是仅剩的不去那儿的人了吧
Well, we could stop by, if you want.
好吧 如果你要坚持的话 我们可以顺便去看下
I mean, we don't have to drink to have fun, right?
我是说 我们没必要在那喝酒玩闹的 对吧
Well, I don't, but I've never woke up
是啊 我也绝不会醒来时
wearing my "Kiss Me, I'm Irish" T-shirt as pants.
把印着"亲亲我 我是爱尔兰人"的T恤当裤子穿
You told him that story?
你把那事儿告诉他了
Not all of it.
不是全部
Just hope Harry's okay.
希望Harry没事
He left here pretty upset after I kissed him.
我亲了他后他就很沮丧的离开了
Wait, did she say she kissed him?
等下 她刚刚说她亲了他
Wow.
哇噢
Wonder if we're talking about a peck on the cheek
我想知道是在脸颊上啄了一下
or full on the mouth...
还是整个对着嘴的
like Carl and that horse.
就像Carl和那匹马
Harry?
Harry
What are you doing down there?
你在下面干嘛呢
I'm sorry that I ran out on you the way I did.
我对我那样离开感到很抱歉
I just panicked.
我只是慌了
No, I'm sorry.
不 我要说对不起
I shouldn't have kissed you.
我不该亲你的
I was just so excited about my grade and...
我只是对我的成绩感到太兴奋
you have been so lovely to me.
你对我又如此的好
Don't apologize.
别说对不起
That kiss changed my life.
那个吻改变了我的一生
Oh, Harry.
哦 Harry
Don't speak... hear me out.
别说话 听我说
I've been mustering the courage to say this,
我一直在鼓起勇气说这些
and if I don't do it now, I never will.
要是我现在不说的话 我就再没机会说出口了
I'm listening.
我听着呢
I'm sure whatever you're feeling,
我能肯定无论你是什么感觉
I'm feeling the same.
我和你是一样的
I'm gay.
我是同性恋
Okay, that threw me for a little bit of a loop.
好吧 这确实有点震撼到了我
The minute you put your beautiful mouth on mine
当你把你美丽的双唇放在我唇上的那一刻
and I felt absolutely nothing,
我却完全没有感觉
I knew the truth.
我就明白了
Hang on.
慢着
You didn't feel nothin'?
你什么都没感觉到
Nada. Goose eggs. Zilch.
什么都没有 零蛋 毫无感觉
What about if I, like, put your hand on my boob
要是我 把你的手放在我的胸上
and let you mush it around a little?
再让你揉一揉呢
What's going on? Hi, Mike.
这是怎么了 嘿 Mike
Hi, Molly.
嘿 Molly
I'm gay.
我是个同性恋
Good for you.
真好
You still going to Carl's party?
你还去Carl的派对吗
What the hell's going on out here?
这尼玛是怎么了
Harry just figured out that he's gay.
Harry刚刚才发现他是个同性恋
Really? I could have told him that two years ago.
真的吗 两年前我就可以告诉他这点
迈克和茉莉（2010）
Mike & Molly
剧集 | 迈克和茉莉（2010） | 导航列表