好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S11E14
Part 2
Nov. 18, 2020, 5:18 p.m.
It's Lyndsey.
是关于林赛
Mm, Lyndsey. Lyndsey.
林赛 林赛
I'm sorry, uh,
抱歉
Lyndsey is...? My girlfriend.
林赛是...? 我女朋友
Oh, yes, yes. You know, I-I can never remember her name,
对 对 我从来都记不住她的名字
because, you know, I never really knew her.
因为我压根就不认识她
Doesn't matter. Anyway, she dumped me.
没关系 重点是她甩了我
She dumped you?!
她甩了你?!
Oh, my God!
我的天哪
Oh, my God.
我的天哪
I was so shocked, my first reaction was wrong.
我很惊讶 惊讶到第一个反应错了
Yeah, well, it's been a really rough two weeks.
这两周过得真是艰辛
Wait, two weeks?
等等 两周吗
You-you guys have been broken up for two weeks
你们都分手两周了
and this is the first I'm hearing about it?
我才听说这个消息啊
Oh, I'm sorry, buddy. I should have told you sooner.
抱歉 兄弟 我该早点告诉你的
Well, someone certainly should have.
"某人"应该早点告诉我的
Anyway, there is one bright side:
不过 还是有好的一面:
at least now, you and I are free to hang whenever we want.
至少现在 咱们俩想什么时候出来玩都行了
We couldn't before?
难道之前不可以吗
Well, I-I didn't really want to tell you this, but...
其实我不太想告诉你 但是...
Lyndsey didn't like you very much.
林赛不太喜欢你
She said that?
她这么说的吗
Yeah, she'd go on and on about your hair and your clothes.
是啊 她总是唠叨你的头发和衣着
She even said you had the worst taste in jewelry.
甚至还说你对珠宝的品味差到了极点
I don't know where she got that.
我不知道她是怎么看出来的
I mean, it's not like you ever bought her jewelry.
我是说 你又没给她买♥♥过珠宝首饰
That's true.
那倒是真的
Although, if I had, she wouldn't have noticed
即使我买♥♥了 她也看不见
unless I put it in the bottom of her wine glass.
除非是放到她的酒杯里
Women.
女人啊
I know how to kill this pain.
我知道如何化解情伤
Bring me the bottle.
上瓶装的
Yeah, better make it two.
上两瓶
Ooh, and a little whipped cream.
再加点奶油
Oh, hey, Berta, can I ask you a question? Yeah.
波塔 我能问你个问题吗 好啊
I'm a man's man, right?
我是男人的男人 对吗
I thought that when I first met you,
第一次见你的时候有过这种想法
but then I found out you were married to a woman.
但是后来发现你和一个女人结婚了
No... no, I mean, like...
不 不 我是说...
like, I'm a guy who can...
我是一个会...
build things and...
建造东西而且...
a guy who can get horses out of mud and...
能把马拉出泥潭而且...
...who, if-if he gets stabbed, he just rubs dirt in it.
如果挨了一刀就撒土止血的人
You're talking about a guy's guy?
你是说男人中的男人吗
One of those dudes, like, in the boner pill commercials?
就像壮♥阳♥药♥广♥告♥里的猛♥男♥吗
Yeah, exactly.
没错
Yeah. You're not one of those.
你可不是那类人
What?
什么
Well, you're more like one of those guys
你更像那种
that gets a mani-pedi.
会修手指甲和脚趾甲的男的
Yeah, well, first of all,
首先
there is nothing wrong with taking care of yourself.
好好照顾自己并没有错
And second of all,
其次
manicure has the word "man," like, right there in it.
修指甲这个英文词里有"男人"这个词
Well, now, you calm down manly man,
那请你像个男人一样冷静一下
or you're gonna spill your chamomile tea.
不然你的菊花茶就要洒了
At least I'm the manliest man in this house, right?
至少我是这个家里最男人的人吧
What?
怎么
Really? I'm under Alan?
难道我在艾伦"下面"吗
Well, do you want to be on top of him?
那你想在他"上面"吗
What did Jenny tell you?
珍妮跟你说了什么
I was drowning!
我当时溺水了
'Sup, ladies?
女士们 你们好啊
Hey, look who it is: Bob the Builder.
看看谁来了 巴布工程师啊[卡♥通♥人物]
Oh, yeah, it's pretty manly, huh?
是啊 很有男人味吧
The only thing manlier would be
唯一比这更有男人味的
if you were dressed as the cop or the cowboy.
估计是扮成警♥察♥或牛仔
Why... are you gay?
为啥搞基[YMCA]
Is this about the flat tire?
是因为那个泄气的轮胎吗
'Cause you have nothing to prove.
其实你不用证明什么的
Oh, I ain't provin' nothin'.
我不是在证明什么
Just being a guy.
只是在做男人而已
Doin' what guys do, fixin' things.
做男人该做的事 修理东西
And do not expect me
你们不要期待我
to get in touch with my emotions
会有任何娘们情绪
or ask for directions anytime soon.
或者像娘们一样不认路
Is that chewing tobacco?
你在嚼烟草吗
Yes, it is.
是啊
And it tastes terrible.
味道真难吃
And I'm feeling dizzy.
我现在感觉晕乎乎的
Wow, very impressive.
好"厉害"啊
You ain't seen nothing yet.
你还什么都没见识呢
That there's a laser.
这是激光水平仪
Badass.
狠货啊
Gee, oh, this here table is two degrees from being level.
桌子与水平线有2度的夹角
I got this!
我知道怎么办
There we go, job well done.
行了 这就修好了
I'm gonna need my band saw.
现在要用带锯了
You two clean this up.
你们两个把这收拾干净
Ladies' work.
这是娘们的活儿
All right, I'm lubricated.
好了 酒劲上来了
Let's do this thing.
咱们开始吧
So, uh, how was your dinner with Larry the other night?
前几天和拉里的晚餐吃得好吗
Fine.
挺好的
Where did you go?
你们去哪吃的
La Dolce.
甜蜜生活
What did you guys have? Salmon.
吃的什么 三文鱼
Did Larry like it?
拉里喜欢三文鱼吗
Okay, talking about my boyfriend eating fish
聊我男朋友吃鱼
is the world's worst foreplay.
真是世界上最蹩脚的前戏
Is he still eating fish, Lyndsey?
这鱼他还在吃吗 林赛
Is he?
还在吃吗
All right, what's going on?
好吧 发生什么了
I'll tell you what's going on.
我来告诉你发生什么了
Larry told me you broke up with him.
拉里告诉我 你跟他分手了
For the love of God, you're still seeing Larry?!
我了个老天爷 你居然还跟拉里见面
As Jeff Strongman?
以杰夫的身份吗
At least one of us is faithful to him.
至少我们中还有一人没背叛他
Why didn't you tell me?
你干嘛不告诉我
I didn't tell you because I knew you'd just ask
我不告诉你是因为我知道你肯定会问
when you and I are getting back together.
我们什么时候复合
That's not true.
才不会
When are we getting back together?
那我们什么时候复合呢
Alan.
艾伦
Oh, this is what I've been waiting for
我等了六个月
for the last six months.
终于等到了
We-we can finally be together, honestly, openly.
我们终于可以公开坦诚地在一起了
I-I can prove to you
我可以证明给你看
I'm the man that you're supposed to be with.
你就应该跟我这种人在一起
I love you, Lyndsey. Great.
我爱你 林赛 太棒了
So you want to get married?
那你想结婚吗
Whoa, whoa, marriage? We just got back together.
慢着 结婚 我们才刚复合而已
You're just like Larry.
你就跟拉里一样
Neither one of you are willing to commit.
你们俩都不愿意做出承诺
I'm just saying that maybe, you know, we should date a while.
我只是说或许我们应该先约会一阵
I mean, let's be honest, you are a bit of an adulterer.
老实说 你有背着男友偷人的前科
This is why I've been avoiding this conversation.
所以我才一直在回避这个话题
You don't want to get married,
你既然不想结婚
and I don't want to be with you unless we do, so...
那我就不能跟你在一起 除非你改变心意
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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