好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S11E06
Part 3
Nov. 18, 2020, 5:16 p.m.
No, no, it's fine.
不 没关系
Uh, actually, I'm making a list
实际上 我正在列一张
of the people you shouldn't date.
你不该与其约会的名单呢
Uh, Number one: Anyone with a heart.
第一个 任何有良心的人
Okay, you know, I deserve that.
好吧 这是我自找的
And number two, Taylor Swift,
第二个 泰勒·斯威夫特
because she will write a song about you
因为她会给你写一首歌♥
called "Back-Stabbing Dream Killer."
名叫《插♥你♥一刀的梦想杀手》
Okay, well, if you will let me,
如果你愿意的话
I would like to make it up to you.
我可以弥补你
I invited my mother
我邀请了我妈
and Lynda over for dinner tomorrow night.
和琳达明晚过来吃晚饭
So, you are free to ask her out yourself.
你可以自己邀请她出去
If you're joking, I swear to God
如果你是在逗我 我对天发誓
I will pack my things and you will never see me again.
我立马打包行李 再不出现在你面前
I was joking. So was I.
我逗你玩呢 我也逗你呢
You're not just doing this out of pity, are you?
你这么做不是出于可怜我 是吧
Don't answer, I don't care.
不要回答 我不在乎
You're a good friend. So are you.
你是个靠得住的朋友 你也一样
And, again, I'm sorry.
我也再次对你说声抱歉
Thank you.
谢了
Okay. Oh, and, and, a little tip:
对了 一点小建议
when Lynda's here, just try not to act like a crazy fan.
琳达来的时候 别表现出疯狂影迷的样子
I got it.
我知道了
No, no, seriously, like, if, if you want a shot with her
我说真的 如果你想和她有机会发展
you need to treat her like she's a normal person.
你就得把她当做普通人看待
And, and you should pretend to be one, yourself.
而且你自己也得装成正常一点
It's not a problem.
没问题
Until tomorrow.
等我到明天
All right, I'm out of here.
好了 我要走了
Dinner's in the oven and the wine's chilling.
晚饭在炉子里 酒也冰上了
Oh, thank you.
多谢了
No, I was talking about at my house.
才怪 我说的是我自己家里
Oh, before you go, um,
你走之前
which is my good side? What?
我哪边脸更好看 什么
I'm trying to figure out where to sit at dinner.
我在考虑吃饭时应该坐哪里
I-I want my good side facing Lynda.
我想把好看的那边对着琳达
All right.
好吧
Turn to your left. Okay.
你向左转 好
Now turn to your right.
现在向右转
Okay.
没问题
Turn around.
再向后转
Perfect.
这下就完美了
Who hurt you, Berta?
是谁伤你这么深 贝塔
Ooh, uh, just in case.
以防万一
Oh, God, it burns!
我的妈 烧死我了
What did I say about acting like a normal person?
不是叫你表现得像个正常人一点吗
That was before I got mint spray in Little Alan's eye.
我把薄荷喷雾喷到小艾伦的"眼"里去了
I'm not even gonna ask.
我都不想追问原因了
Oh, hey, you two look beautiful.
你们两位大美女
Oh, it's great to see you again, Walden.
真高兴再次见到你 沃尔顿
And don't forget about me.
可别忘了我呀
Oh, don't worry, I haven't.
别担心 我可没忘掉
Okay, you can let go now.
行了 可以放手了吧
Well, I'm glad you two could make it.
你们能来我太高兴了
Wow, this is quite the place.
这地方可真不错
Thank you. Thank you.
多谢夸奖 多谢夸奖
Single guy living at the beach,
住在海边的单身男子
you must do well with the ladies.
你身边一定不缺美女相伴吧
I do okay, but this guy is the real charmer.
我还好啦 这家伙才是真正的万人迷
Blink twice if you're being held against your will.
如果有人威胁你 你就眨眼两次
Well, it's, it's true, in my youth
真的 我年轻的时候
I was a bit of a, a rapscallion.
可以算是个小流氓呢
A rake.
一个放荡子
A... gadabout.
浪子
A... g-gadabout?
浪子
What have you.
诸如此类
Yeah, but that was in your past, right?
但那是你的过去 对吗
And now you're just a normal, regular guy?
现在你是一个普通正常的人
Yeah, that's right, that's right.
没错 没错
I'm just a, a normal, regular guy
我只是一个普通正常的人
looking for a crazy little thing called love.
在寻找一个叫作♥爱♥的疯狂小东西
Crazy little thing called love...
疯狂的小东西 名字叫作♥爱♥
What's that I hear?
我听到的是什么
Is that the lovely voice of triple-threat Lynda Carter?
这是三栖明星琳达·卡特的甜美声音吗
Actress, singer, dancer?
演员 歌♥手 舞者
Wait a second, do I smell mint?
慢着 这是薄荷的味道吗
Yes, and it's not coming from my mouth.
对 而且不是从我的嘴里散发出来的哦
Oh ,uh, uh, would you mind signing it
麻烦你写
"From a Wonder Woman to a Super Man"?
"致超人猛♥男♥ 神奇女侠赠"
How about "Best wishes"? That works.
"祝福你"如何 也行
Hey, you know, I'll, I'll bet you could
我打赌你周游各地
make a lot of money traveling around
在动漫大会之类的会上签名
and signing at conventions and stuff.
一定赚了好多钱
I'm not a big fan of travel.
我不太喜欢旅行
Yeah, not to mention the weirdos you'd meet.
更别提会碰上多少变♥态♥了
You don't have to tell me,
这还用说吗
I mean, I-I've talked to a lot of them
我在《神奇女侠》留言板上
on the Wonder Woman message boards. Freaks!
跟不少这种人谈过 死变♥态♥们
Alan?
艾伦
I'm pretty sure Lynda didn't come here just to sign things.
我相信琳达来这里不是只为了签名的
Oh, of course, of course. Sorry, I just, you know,
当然当然 对不起 我只是
I, I geeked out a bit.
我动漫迷上身了
Oh, that's okay. You can't imagine how often
没关系 你们无法想象
I get roped into these kinds of conversations.
我被骗了多少次去参加这样的动漫大会
Roped? Or...
被骗[绳子]还是
...lassoed?
被套住了
Oh, God. He's gonna tie her up and throw her in a van.
老天 他要把她绑起来 扔进面包车里
No, no. This is an original Wonder Woman Lasso of Truth.
才不会 这是原版的神奇女侠的"真言套索"
I-I got it at Comic Con '88.
88年我在动漫大会上买♥♥的
Yeah, back when only the really cool people went.
那年头只有真正的酷哥才去参加动漫大会
Whoever is wearing the lasso must tell the truth.
被这个套索套住的人 一定要说真话
Is this the best night of my life?
这是我人生中最开心的一晚吗
It is.
是的
Are you completely oblivious to social cues?
你是完全不懂察言观色吗
You are.
是的
Oh, oh, would you mind posing with it
你不介意拿着它摆个姿势
so I can snap a quick picture?
我拍张照吧
Alan, enough.
艾伦 别太过分
No. It, it's okay. Let's just take the picture.
不 没关系 去拍照吧
Oh great, great. Oh, crud. The memory's full.
太好了 该死 记忆卡全满了
Uh, uh, let me just delete a few.
我删掉一些照片
Good-bye, Jake. Good-bye, Jake.
再见 杰克 再见 杰克
Oh, kitty, hang in there.
小猫 继续挂着吧[小猫挂绳子上的经典图片]
Good-bye, Jake.
再见 杰克
Okay, would you like to... Yes!
你想不想... 想
Hurry back.
快回来哦
It's going well, isn't it?
进展真顺利 对吗
I have chimps smarter than you.
我的黑猩猩都比你聪明
I'm really sorry about tonight.
今晚真是抱歉
Oh, it's okay. He's harmless.
没事 他人畜无害
He is harmless, right?
他是真无害的吧
Yeah, he's harmless, clueless, homeless.
他无害 无智力 无家可归
He's pretty much "less."
他基本上就是三无人员
Still, I'm glad I came over.
我还是很高兴来你家
It's really good to see you again.
再次见到你真好
Yeah, it's good to see you, too. And you look amazing.
我也很高兴见到你 你看起来美极了
Or, should I say, "Wonder-ful."
我是不是应该说 太"神奇"了
See? When you do it, it's cute.
瞧 你说的时候就觉得可爱
Oh, uh, Jenny,
珍妮
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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