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It's you guys!
你们为什么要看这种烂玩意
Why are you watching this stuff?
正是因为你们的要求太低了
It's your fault for demanding so little of us
我们才安于现状
that we settle.
我感觉自己的脸都快丢尽了
I can't feel my face right now,
但你们知道吗
but you know what?
当我接受这份工作的时候
I knew exactly what this job was
就知道它的内容
when I took it.
赚这种钱的我真可耻
Shame on me for taking the money!
把我捧上天的你们也真可耻
Shame on you for making me famous!
我们都很可耻
Shame on all of us!
够了
That's enough.
你在...
What are you...
我又不会揍你 兄弟
I'm not gonna hit you, man.
我不会揍你
I'm not gonna hit you!
你把我当成什么暴♥力♥分子了吗
What do you... you think I'm some kind of animal?
我只是快被逼疯了而已
I'm just gonna go nuts!
听我说
Listen,
瑞安·高斯林不会接这种烂剧
Ryan Gosling may not do this crap,
我也不会接
and neither will I.
我不干了
I quit...
我不干了
I quit.
很高兴能跟您合作 我是您的忠实粉丝
Great working with you, man. I'm a huge fan.
没错 刚刚挺开心的
Yeah, that was a lot of fun.
丽贝卡 再使把劲
All right, Rebecca, one more big push, now.
就是这样
There you go...
-用劲 -加油 小贝
- Keep pushing! - Come on, Bec.
好了
All right!
好了
All right.
大儿子出来了
First male is out,
他很健康
and he is looking good!
你听到了吗 宝贝
You hear that, baby?
我们生了个男孩 我们生了个男孩
We got a boy! We got a boy!
我们生了个男孩
We got a boy!
谢谢你的努力 女士
Thank you, ma'am.
-宝贝 -有些不对劲
- Baby? - Something's not right.
我感觉有些不对劲
There's something's not right.
医生
Doctor?
护士给她戴下氧气罩
Some oxygen for her, please?
丽贝卡 你做得很好 甜心
Rebecca? You've done real good, sweetheart,
但现在你得休息一会儿
but we need to let you get some rest right now
我可能要换种方式给你接生 好吗
and let's see if I can't take it from here, okay?
不好意思 怎么了
I'm sorry, what's happening?
我要进里面去
I'm gonna have to go in
接生另外两个宝宝 走吧
for the other two people, let's go.
你妻子现在情况不妙 杰克
Your wife is in distress, Jack.
此时此刻 你得相信我
Now, right now, you just need to trust me
别妨碍我做事
and get the hell out of my way.
-等等 我... -赶紧把他弄出去
- No, wait, but I'm... - Get him out of the room, now.
稳住
Stat.
-孩子们 -爸爸
- Guys? - Daddy!
亲爱的 你去帮安妮看看作业
Hey, babe, I need you to help Annie with her homework...
孩子们
Guys...
这位是你们的...
this is your, uh...
威廉
William.
他叫威廉
This is William.
-您好 -您好
- Hi. - Hi.
威廉·希尔
William Hill.
你好
Hi.
我是贝丝 抱歉 我是贝丝
I'm Beth. I'm sorry. I'm Beth.
很高兴认识你 贝丝
It's a pleasure meeting you, Beth.
你的裤子破了个洞
You have a hole in your pants.
安妮
Annie!
没关系 确实如此
Oh, that's okay. I actually do.
年轻人不都觉得这样很酷吗
Hey, isn't that what the kids do to be cool?
他们把裤子剪出洞 对吧
They put holes in their pants, right?
但不是这样的
Not like that.
原来是这样 我还以为这样很酷
Well, here I was, thought I was being cool.
那要是我这样呢 哟 你好啊
Wait, what if I do this? Yo, what's going...
-不酷 -不
- No. - No.
我的天 你一定就是苔丝
My, my, my, you must be Tess.
-是的 -我听说你踢足球...
- Yes. - I hear you play soccer...
我应该提前打电♥话♥的
I should have called.
但我不知道怎么开这个口
I didn't know how to say it out loud.
-所以你干脆就... -我...
- So, you just... - I...
我没办法解释 宝贝
I have no explanation, baby.
不管我想说他什么
Like, everything I want to say
对他做什么 到最后都背道而驰
or do around this man, I do the opposite.
就像狗血的情景喜剧
It's like a bad sitcom.
就好像《靓男保姆》或者《怎么了》
It's like an episode of The Man-ny
里面的剧情
or What's Happening!!
他把我扔在消防局
He left me at a fire station
我却请他来我们家
and I invited him into our home.
天啊 亲爱的 你突然大笑干嘛
Oh, my God, baby, you're cracking up.
爸爸
Daddy?
你怎么了
What's happening?
怎么了
What's happening?
-别开玩笑 -是真的
- You're not serious. - I am.
什么 萨丽·菲尔德
Wait, Sally Field?
是的 我喜欢萨丽·菲尔德 告我啊
Yeah. I have a thing for Sally Field. Sue me.
她差不多六十岁了吧
She's, like, 60.
六十岁是性感新潮 你不知道吗
60 is the new sexy. You didn't know that?
等她七十的时候...
And when she turns 70...
可要当心了
Look out,
萨丽七十多岁会登上性感的巅峰
Sally is gonna peak in her 70s.
我保证
I promise you.
-好啊 -能向两位推荐甜点吗
- Yeah... - Can I interest you in dessert?
-不用 谢谢 -可以
- Oh, no thanks. - Yes!
-不要 -可以
- No. - Yes.
-不要 -可以
- No. - Yes.
-不要 -可以
- No! - Yes.
他刚才问的是
He was just asking
他能不能给我们推荐甜品
if he could interest us in dessert.
我同意了
I am saying that he can.
我对甜品非常感兴趣
I am very interested in dessert.
我对甜品深深地着迷
I am utterly fascinated by dessert.
甜品是我一生的挚爱
Dessert is my life's work.
所以
So...
我们买♥♥单 谢谢
We will just have the check, please.
谢谢
Thank you.
-谢谢 -谢谢
- Thank you. - Thank you.
我一般不喜欢意大利炖饭
I don't normally like risotto,
但如果你把它捏成团 再下锅炸
but if you put it in a ball form, and-and deep fry it,
我能吃上一千个
I can eat, like, a thousand of them.
今晚过得很开心 托比
I had a really nice time tonight, Toby.
-谢谢你 -是啊
- Thank you. - Yeah.
等一下 不不不
Wait, what? No, no, no.
这就完了吗
What, that's it?
什么意思
What do you mean?
你不想请我进去...
I mean, you're not gonna invite me in for a...
喝上一杯或者...
a nightcap or...
帮我做一次手活吗
a handy or something?
-真搞笑 -可不是吗
- Cute. - I am.
谢谢
Thank you.
今晚我真的很开心
I did have a really nice time tonight.
好吧 你可以进来喝杯水
Okay. You can come inside for a water.
-好的 -就一杯水
- All right. - A water.
我们已经喝了三四两酒了
We have already had our six ounces of wine.
我知道
I know.
大约含150卡路里
150 calories per six ounce.
是啊
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