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You have Osgood-"Shladder" disease?
其实发音是施罗德
Actually, it's pronounced "Schlotter,"
后面还附上了报纸
And there's an article attached.
我的腿后肌和韧带跟不上骨头发育的节奏
My hamstrings and ligaments aren't keeping up with my bones.
我长得太快了
I'm growing too fast.
你长得太快了 哪里太快了
You're growing too fast? Where?
假条上都写了
I-it's all in the note.
你真指望我相信
You really expect me to believe
你母亲写了这张假条吗
your mother wrote this note?
是的 因为这真是她写的
Yes, 'cause she actually did.
孩子 你看过电影《红色黎明》吗
Son, did you ever see the movie "Red dawn"?
看过太多遍了
A million times.
你爱电影吗 我可是爱死了
Do you love movies? 'cause I love movies.
我问你一个问题
Let me ask you a question.
如果俄♥国♥佬突然入侵费城的郊外
What are you gonna do when the Russki invaders
你会怎么做
storm the suburbs of Philly?
我觉得他们会对沿海城市
Actually, I think they'd be more interested
和金融中心更有兴趣
in coastal cities and financial centers.
你得反抗
You're gonna have to fight
并且使用在这里学到的技能
and use the skills you learned right here!
-引体向上也有用吗 -尤其是引体向上
- Even the pull-up? - Especially the pull-up.
你需要上臂的力量打烂头骨
You'll need your upper-arm strength to bash skulls.
我不想打烂头骨
I don't want to... Bash skulls.
《红色黎明》里的孩子也不想
The kids in "Red dawn" didn't want to, either,
但他们这样做才能生存
but they had to in order to survive.
那么 假条的事说到哪里了
So...Where are we with that note?
我刚收到这位金巴巴先生提供的
I just received an authentic, bona fide note
真实合法的假条
from mr. Goldfarb here
说他的身体状况不能参加
saying that he is physically unable
总统体能测试
to complete the presidential fitness test.
所以 我决定将测试推迟一周
So, I've decided to push the test one week
让他有所好转
until he gets better.
在那之前 大家跑圈
Until then, we'll be running laps.
金巴巴先生会站在这里看着大家跑
Mr. Goldfarb will stand here and watch.
请随便用你自己的方式 祝福他早日康复
Feel free to wish him a speedy recovery in your own way.
好了 大家跑
All right! Let's go!
快跑 抬高膝盖
Hoof it! Knees high!
你死定了 金呆格
You're so dead, Goldnerd.
完全理解
Totally get it.
你太客气了 莉莎 太客气了
Oh, real nice, Lisa. Real nice.
与此同时 爱丽卡的笔友范妮已经到了
Meanwhile, Erica's pen pal, Fanny, had arrived
正在参观金伯格家的房♥子
and was getting the grand tour of the Goldberg home.
这里是窗户
我们从这里溜出去见男生
太棒了
Fantastique.
好吗 范妮
'sup, Fanny?
我的家就是你的家[西班牙语]
Mi casa es su casa.
想来点法式面包吗
Hunk of your native bread?
这是我弟弟 巴瑞
巴瑞 你好
Oh. Barree. Bonjour.
你好
Hi.
给
Oh, here.
我帮你翻译好的在卡上了
Use these cards I translated for you.
从这句开始 说的是 欢迎来到我家
Start with this one. It says, "Welcome to our home.
你能来真是太好了
It's really nice to have you here."
欢迎来到我家
臭味是我发出来的
不错 很好的开始
Good stuff. Great start.
我知道你想说下一句
Um, I know you want to do this next one.
意思说 你好吗 美女
It's "How you doing, girl?"
肚子是我全部力量的来源
-她喜欢 -对 很管用 接着说
- She likes it. - Yeah, it's working. Don't stop now.
我对加里·科尔曼非常有性趣[70年代的童星]
好的
Okay...
听起来我刚说了加里·科尔曼
It sounded like I said "Gary Coleman."
好奇怪
Weird.
好美的语言
Beautiful language.
晚安 或者我应该说
Good night. Or should I say...
猫放屁
我告诉你们 金巴巴先生及太太
Let me tell you something, mr. and mrs. Goldfarb.
我这辈子讨厌三样
There are three things I hate in life --
我的前妻 胡萝卜 谎言
My ex-wife, carrots, and lies.
我为什么要关店赶来这里
Okay, why did I close my store and rush down here?
因为里根总统通过一封复印信
Because president Reagan asked me personally
亲自要求我监督他设计的
through a xeroxed letter to oversee a fitness test
体能测试
of his design.
你们的儿子试图用一张荒谬的假条
And your son tried to get of it
来逃避测试
with an absurd note...
没有家长会写这种假条
That no parent would ever write.
假条是我写的
I wrote the note.
要命
Oh me.
这是荒唐的测试 默里
It was a ridiculous test, Murray.
从什么时候开始 做多少个引体向上
Since when is strength measured
成为了判断能力的标准
by how many pull-ups a person can do?
你知道什么是真正有能力吗
You know what takes real strength?
扮演好音乐剧
Tackling the role of Levi
《约瑟夫与神奇的梦幻彩衣》中利维的角色
in "Joseph and the amazing technicolor dreamcoat."
亚当棒极了
And Adam was scrumptious.
我的测试没问题 女士
There's nothing wrong with my test, ma'am.
如果说亚当有病
If Adam suffers from anything,
也是严重许多的
it is from a far more serious
永远治不好的病 叫做胆小
and permanent condition called the wuss-bags.
我的儿子也许不是运动能手 而且害怕鸟
My son may be unathletic and afraid of birds --
不是所有鸟都怕
He's not afraid of all birds.
-我知道 不是所有鸟 -不是所有鸟
- I know, not all birds. - Not all birds.
但他不是胆小鬼
But he's not a wuss.
我要进行的测试 是美国总统
Look, I am administering a test at the direct order
直接下达的命令
of the president of the United States.
如果不想让亚当参加 找总统开假条
If you want Adam out of it, get a note from him.
那就说定了
Then it's settled.
我们周一见
I'll see you back here on Monday.
出什么事了
What just happened?
她去找总统要假条了
She's gonna go get a note from the president.
小心了 里根先生
Look out, mr. Reagan.
贝弗莉·金伯格来找你了
Beverly Goldberg's coming for you.
我妈妈找总统的任务开始了
My mom's mission to track down the president had begun.
第一站 哈里斯堡 州首府
First stop -- Harrisburg, the state capital.
你好 我是宾州公民贝弗莉·金伯格
Hello. I'm pennsylvania citizen Beverly Goldberg,
我是来找州长的
And I'm here to speak to the governor.
这里是审计官办公室
This is the comptroller's office.
很好 那我要找审计官
Great. Then I'll speak to the comptroller.
是什么事情呢
A-a-and what does this pertain to?
总统体能测试
The presidential fitness test.
审计官要怎么帮忙呢
And the comptroller can help how?
他能帮我联♥系♥上州长
He can put me in touch with the governor,
州长能帮我联♥系♥上总统
who can put me in touch with the president
这样我的儿子不用上体育课
so I can get my son out of gym class.
问一下 你知不知道审计官是做什么的
Question -- do you have any idea what a-a comptroller does?
当然
Of course.
他审着伟大的宾州
He comptrols the great state of Pennsylvania,
我需要他帮我联♥系♥上审着美国的人
and I need him to get me to the man who comptrols america.
是这样的 审着
Here's a thing -- uh, "Comptrol,"
你用来造句的 并不是个词
The way you're using it, isn't a word.
-是的 -不是的
- Yes, it is. - No. No, it's not.
-是的 -不是的
- It is. - Not really.
-是的 -绝对不是个词
- Yeah, it is. - Definitely not a word --
真的不是个词
Straight-up not a word.
但我感觉到你是不达目的不会离开
Uh, but I get the sense you're not gonna leave,
所以我会这样做
So here's what I'm gonna do.
州议会办公室有个家伙
There's a guy in the state assembly's office
搞了我妹子
who screwed over my sister.
我觉得他应该见见你
I think he should meet you.
可以吗
Sound good?
非常好
Sounds great.
我写下怎么去
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