无耻家庭

Shameless S01E05

Part 4 Jan. 9, 2020, 10:55 a.m.

Maybe you're being a little pessimistic.
婚姻不过是废纸一张
It's just a piece of paper!
出生证明也是一张纸
A birth certificate is just a piece of paper.
还有钱钱也是一张纸
And money-- money is just a piece of paper.
但它们都很有价值
But those are pretty valuable.
没错
True.
格洛丽亚·斯泰纳姆别说废话了
Hey, Gloria Steinem, enough of the blah-blah.
格洛丽亚·斯泰纳姆美国著名女权主义者
说说我的单身派对吧
Let's talk bachelorette party.
别担心包在我身上
I got that covered, don't worry.
最好是
Oh, you better.
因为我们要嗨起来
'Cause we gonna be doing it.
你来接着唱
You sing it, lady!
来吧来吧
Let's go. Let's go!
觉得恶心
Feeling sick,
疲惫见我肿瘤医生的次数
feeling tired, seeing more of my oncologist
比见家人还多
than I see of my whole family.
但最让我难以接受的是
The hardest thing for me to accept is the fact
我对此无能为力
that I can't fix this.
我是个母亲你明白吗
I'm so used to being the mom, you know?
一个撑起整个家庭的人
The one who takes care of everyone and everything.
没什么是我做不到的
The fixer.
但是这乳腺癌
And this is breast cancer.
我却什么都做不了
I can't fix this.
一想到你的那对双峰正在慢慢杀死你
Just knowing your tits are trying to kill you...
这感觉烂透了
that's gotta suck.
我是说我的蛋蛋也得癌症了
I mean, mine's in my balls.
但它们至少有生气的理由
At least they've got a reason to be pissed.
每天被夹在两腿被嵌在菊花附近
Tucked between two legs, wedged right near your asshole.
坐也坐不好没有一款内♥裤♥
There's no good way to sit, no underwear that's been devised
能很好的放置它们
to hold 'em effectively in place.
好像它是多余的一样
They're a bizarre appendage.
这是后话
An afterthought.
因此我不相信创物论了
Which is why I don't believe in intelligent design.
世上根本就没有上帝
There is no God.
人都逃不了一死
We're all gonna die.
为什么让我来做
Why do I have to do it?
因为只有你的年纪
'Cause you're the only one
适合当辅祭
who's young enough to be an altar boy.
我们会在任何事情发生之前阻止他的
We'll stop him before anything goes down.
或是在某人口♥交♥之前
Or anyone.
go down既有"发生"又有"口♥交♥"的意思
加拉格家的孩子们
The Gallagher boys.
如果你们是来偷中午的救济餐的话
If you're here to steal the noon offering basket,
那你们来晚了
you're out of luck.
-已经没有了 -不是不是
- Already off to the bank. - No, no.
卡尔想来做你的辅祭
Carl here is interested in being an altar boy.
那可责任重大啊
That's a big responsibility.
我们也是这么说的
Yeah, we know.
我们想让他打消这念头但他又哭又喊
We tried talking him out of it, but he cried and cried,
所以我们带他过来
so we thought we'd bring him in,
看看你怎么说
see if you thought he had what it takes.
你好卡尔
Hello there, Carl.
哥们儿我们一会儿回来
Be back for ya in a bit, bud.
今晚想再看一遍《疤面煞星》吗
Want to watch Scarface again tonight?
不行我约了人
Can't. Got a date.
约的曼迪还是凯希
Ooh, a Mandy date or Kash date?
凯希
Kash date.
你这个小骚货
You're a slut, man.
不好了
Shit!
看来小维婚礼的牧师有着落了
Looks like we have a priest for V's wedding.
假牧师
A fake priest?
不不牧师是真的
No, no, priest is real.
不领证而已
We're just not gonna file the license.
在上帝面前撒谎
A little immoral, don't you think?
有点不道德啊你不觉得吗
Like lying to God's face?
不是吧你 "正义"先生
Really, Mr. Morality?
我们现在坐的是谁的车
Whose car is this that we're in?
我车里又没有牧师
It's not like I have a priest in the back.
你还能去取蛋糕吗
Are you still picking up the cake?
安吉里卡面包店
Angelica's Bakery.
仪式之后能把这辆车借给凯文和维罗妮卡
Hey, can Kev and V use this car for their big exit
让他们开走吗
after the reception?
没问题
Uh, yeah, I think that could work.
但他们用完就要还给我
I just, I need it back right after.
-好的 -不过不能把车弄坏
- Okay. - You can't do anything bad to it.
也不能在车里做♥爱♥
And no sex in it.
不能在车里做♥爱♥
No sex in it?
我得尽量把车保持在完美的状况
I just need this thing in perfect condition.
好吧菲奥娜
All right, Fiona,
我...
I just... Whoa, whoa!
妈的糟了
Aw, damn it! Damn it!
天啊
Jesus!
放松放轻松常有的事
Relax, relax. It happens, okay?
是吗发生什么进监狱吗
Yeah? What happens, prison time?
你好菲奥娜
Hey, Fiona.
我就觉得是你
I thought that was you.
你的制♥服♥看起来不一样了
Your uniform looks different.
是啊发了新的大衣
Yeah, they issued new coats.
明天凯文和维罗妮卡的婚礼能见到你吗
See you at Kev and Veronica's wedding tomorrow?
能啊
Yeah.
请出示你的驾照和登记号♥码
I'm gonna need to see your license and registration, sir.
什么为什么警官先生
What? Why, Officer, sir?
因为你超速了
Well, you were doing 35 in a 25.
而且还蛇行
And there was some swerving.
有点奇怪
That was kind of weird.
这是我的驾照但登记号♥码我没带
Here's my license, but I actually don't have the registration.
这是我朋友的车
It's actually my friend's car.
你应该随身携带的
You really are supposed to have that on you at all times.
我去看看怎么办
Let me see what I can do.
等我一会儿
I'll be right back.
好的
Okay.
你干嘛给他你的驾照
Why did you give him your license?!
那个驾照是假的
That's not my real license.
那我们现在怎么办逃跑吗
Yeah, so now what? We run?
不那样绝对行不通
No, that never works.
何塞听到了吗
Jesus, you got me?
好多谢哥们
Yeah, thanks, buddy.
何塞是谁
Well, who's Jesus?
跟车通常都会有辆跟车以防万一
Follow car. Always use a follow car.
下次注意不要超速先生
Watch your speed, sir.
婚礼上见小菲
See you at the wedding, Fi.
好的
Okay!
-出去 -什么
- Out. - What?
从车里出去
Get out!
那车怎么办
What about the car?
会有人管的
Taken care of.
我的心都要跳到嗓子眼了
My heart's in my throat right now.
是肾上腺素的作用是不是很酷啊
It's adrenaline. It's kinda cool, isn't it?
我们婚礼上见
I'll see you at the wedding.
什么
What?
-安吉里卡面包店是吧 -是的
- Angelica's Bakery, right? - Yeah, right.
我打算以后每天都系领带
I've decided to start wearing a tie every day.
我随时都可能会挂掉
I could die at any moment.
我想死神来了的时候打扮帅点挺不错的
I thought it'd be nice to look my best for the Grim Reaper.
狗♥娘♥养♥的
Son of a bitch.
你知道嘛
You know what?
去他妈的
Fuck him.
去他妈的
Fuck him!
为什么要满足死神
Why give him the satisfaction?
我会自己了结
I'll do it myself.
了结自己这该死的生命