公园与游憩（2009）

Parks and Recreation S03E15

Part 2 Jan. 27, 2024, 11:45 a.m.

你让我喊你的名字
You told me to say your name.
而你做得很棒超级明星
And you did a great job, superstar.
另一个谁说点什么
Someone else say something.
你看起来像个怪人
You look like a freak.
转
Swivel!
April 这可不是好态度
April, that is not a very good attitude.
我会盯着你的
I will keep my eye on you
就从我这个能看见一切的旋转桌子上
from my circular desk where I can see everything.
小小旋转看到怎么做了吗
Tiny swivel. See how it works?
那我的办公室和它的几面墙呢
What about my office and its many walls?
那成为了新的公共等待室
That becomes a new public waiting room.
我们把你门前的那个大柱子也拆掉了
And we got rid of that giant pillar that was in front of your door.
我爱那个柱子
I loved that pillar.
它让站在我门口变得很讨厌
It made it really annoying to stand in my doorway.
嗯接受吧因为它已经没了
Well, get over it, because it's gone.
你将会比过去更容易接近
You're gonna be more accessible than ever.
四楼小额索赔法庭
The fourth floor. Small claims court,
离婚登记州立毒品检测
divorce filings, state-ordered drug tests.
居然同时又冷又潮湿
It's somehow both freezing and humid.
四楼有一整个房♥间
There's a whole room on the fourth floor
放着他们没收的来四楼捅人时用的刀子
where they store the knives they've confiscated from people who went to the fourth floor to stab someone.
你们是公园娱乐部吗 - 是啊
You from Parks and Rec? - Yeah.
我给你们介绍下
I'm here to show you around.
很高兴见到你女士您的名字是
Nice to meet you, ma'am. What's your name?
Ethel Beavers 跟着我
Ethel Beavers. Follow me.
好了你们到了
Okay, this is you.
哦哇
Oh, wow!
两台电脑吗
Double computers?
我有自己的办公室电♥话♥了
I get my own office phone.
你好哇华尔街
Hello, Wall Street.
买♥♥点股票现在
Buy more stocks. Now.
这个电♥话♥闻起来像屁♥股♥
This phone kind of smells like a butt.
尽量别挪东西
Try not to move things around.
因为严格来说这里还是个犯罪现场
Because technically speaking, this is still a crime scene.
这是你们的名牌
Here's your name tags.
给
Here.
Ethel 这件衬衫可是Theory的
Ethel, this shirt is from Theory.
名牌会戳洞的我才不戴呢
Name tags make holes. I'm not wearing this.
随便你了
Do what you want.
拜 Ethel - 该死
Bye, Ethel! - Damn it.
下次提醒我问她林肯被枪击的时候她在哪
Remind me next time to ask her where she was when Lincoln got shot.
"提醒...Tom...问...啥"
"Remind... Tom... Ask... Something."
搞定了老板
You got it, boss.
嘿某人给某人做了个混音带
Hey! Somebody made somebody a mix!
我当然听取了你上次的意见
And I definitely heard your feedback from last time,
所以我只放了五首Sarah McLachlan在里面
so I only put five Sarah McLachlan songs on this one.
酷哦我们是不是该聊聊你为何称你妈是个你没见过的菲律宾人
Cool. Should we talk about how you claimed your mom was a Filipino woman you'd never met?
要聊吗
Should we?
我只是想拖延避免不了的事
I was just trying to delay the inevitable.
如果这段关系认真了
If this turns into something real,
我们就必须面对Chris的规矩
then we are gonna have to deal with Chris' rule,
还有父母讨厌的牙线习惯
and parents, and annoying flossing habits,
还有一堆不有趣的事情
and a lot of un-fun stuff.
但现在还没
But not yet.
我只想享受一下下那个泡泡
I just want to enjoy the bubble for a little while.
对不起
I'm sorry.
一切还好吗 - 不不好
Everything's good? - No, it's not.
我完全慌了我表现得像个白♥痴♥一样
I was completely flustered. I came off like an idiot.
有一个时候毫无理由地
I mean, at one point, for no reason,
我把鞋子脱下来拎在手上了
I just took off my shoes and held them in my hand.
我去问问她经过如何我赌她爱死你了
I'm gonna go ask her how it went, and I bet she loved you.
我爱死他了
I loved him!
他太好说话了
He's a total pushover.
虽然是很奇怪的人
Very odd guy, though.
他就像是只愚蠢懦弱的水母
He's like a goofy, spineless jellyfish.
为啥你要问啊亲爱的
Why do you ask, sweetheart?
没啥
No reason.
别担心完全没问题的
Don't worry about it. It's totally fine.
不有问题
No, it's not fine.
如果她开始到处告诉人我好说话呢
What if she starts going around telling people I'm a pushover?
没人会相信的
No one's gonna believe that.
我第一次遇见你我觉得你是个法♥西♥斯♥式的狠角色
When I first met you, I thought you were a fascist hard-ass.
什么 - 一个可爱的法♥西♥斯♥狠角色
What? - A cute fascist hard-ass,
但还是你散发着一种...
but still, you give off a very...
教♥育♥部♥门现在正式要求10辆校车
Education Department now officially requesting 10 school buses.
我以为他们只想要4辆的
I thought they only wanted four.
嗯现在我好说话了为啥不要10辆 20辆
Well, now that I'm a pushover, why not ask for 10, or 20,
或者一百辆新校车还有一个舰队呢
or 100 new school buses and a fleet of school yachts?
这样怎样我们现在要做的是
How about that? Here's what we're gonna do.
你要告诉我所有关于你妈需要知道的事情
You are gonna tell me everything there is to know about your mom.
我要跟她再见一次面
And I'm gonna have another meeting with her,
我们要好好来一场
and we're gonna have it out.
或者我们去伯利兹玩潜水
Or we could go to Belize and go scuba diving.
我们还可以去看鲸鲨
And we could look at the whale sharks.
你有证吧我们可以让你学
You're certified, right? Let's get you certified.
April 我要的使用报告你搞好了吗
April, do you have that usage report that I asked for?
乐意为你做任何事 Jerry
Anything for you, Jerry.
谢谢
Thank you.
你会失败的
哦拜托为什么啊
Oh, come on. Why?
打扰了
Excuse me.
Ramsett公园有个标语说"别喝洒水器里的水"
There's a sign at Ramsett Park that says "Do not drink the sprinkler water,"
所以我用它做了太阳茶现在我感染了
so I made sun tea with it, and now I have an infection.
先生
Sir?
先生你...你在听我说话吗先生
Sir, are... Are you listening to me, sir?
先生我在和你说话呢
Sir, I'm talking to you!
先生
Sir!
先生你意识到
Sir, are you aware
你们的水系统有废水吗
that there is waste in your water system?
好的你需要表现得坚强有力果断
Okay, you need to be strong, powerful, decisive.
这不是会面这是场战斗
This is not a meeting. It's a battle.
通常的会面规则不适用
Normal meeting rules do not apply.
我扮作我妈我会对你很严厉
I'll be my mom and I'm gonna be very harsh with you,
但这只是因为我很喜欢你
and it's only because I like you a lot.
好的 - 开始
Okay. - Go!
你好 - 错了
Hello. - Wrong.
什么 - 不要寒暄不要介绍
What? - No preambles. No introductions.
直接进来开始说
Just walk in and start talking.
我想讨论下校车的问题
I'd like to discuss the new school bus.
我想讨论下你的押韵问题呢苏斯博士
I'd like to discuss your rhyming, Dr. Seuss.
你现在应该已经坐下了 - 什么
And you should be sitting by now. - What?
就走进来直接坐下
Just walk in and take a seat.
嗯... - "嗯"是"蠢"的声音
Um... - "Um" is the sound in "dumb."
那是她跟别人说的
That's what she says to people.
然后你现在翘着二郎腿跟个女人似的
And now you've crossed your legs like a woman.
天啊好了我们应该从头开始吗
God! Okay, should we just start over?
不不我们得先标记一下
No. No, we need to put a pin in this.
这是我妈最喜欢的100个聊天话题
Here is a list of my mother's top 100 favorite conversation topics,
从波斯地毯开始以Daniel Craig结束
starting with Persian rugs, ending with Daniel Craig.
你有十分钟的时间记下来
You have 10 minutes to memorize it.
《生死狂澜》电影吗 - 嗯哼
Deliverance, the movie? - Mmm-hmm.
哦天啊
Oh, God.
所以Jerry现在基本上是我的老板了
So Jerry is, like, basically my boss now,
我是永远不会给他干活的
which I'm never gonna work for him.
Ron困在了这个诡异的桌子监狱里
Ron's trapped in this weird desk prison,
而我现在在这个移♥动♥输液台工作了
and I now work at this traveling IV station.
这是Mort Jansen的办公室吗
This Mort Jansen's office?
不是
Nope.
跟Mort说 "轮到你了"
Tell Mort I said "Your move."
我的天我想跟你们在这上班这也太棒了
Oh, my God. I wanna work up here with you guys. This is awesome.
还有多少需要你扫描的蠢文件啊