公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation S03E05
Part 2
Jan. 27, 2024, 11:45 a.m.
我更像是幕后的那种人
I'm more of a behind-the-scenes kind of guy.
要么就来加入我们 要不就去打屁屁椅
Well, it's either come with us or get in the spank chair.
所以 可能这是采访时间了 来吧各位 掌声欢迎
So, maybe it's time for an interview. Come on, everybody, give him a hand.
来吧 - 来吧 Ben 是的
Come on! - Come on over, Ben. Yeah.
所以 这个家伙 Ben Wyatt...我们上AltaVista搜了他
So, this guy, Ben Wyatt... We're looking him up on AltaVista.
他是从一个乡巴佬小镇来的 明尼苏达 鹧鸪城
He's from some hick town, Partridge, Minnesota.
他18岁的时候 被当选为市长
And when he's 18, he's elected mayor.
挺好笑 挺好笑的
That's funny. That's funny.
是的 他18岁 成为市长
Yeah, he's 18, becomes the mayor,
然后把整个预算都扔在一个溜冰场上
and then blows the whole budget on an ice skating rink.
城市破产了 - 笑死人
City goes bankrupt. - Joke!
滚出去吧
Get out of there!
你把它叫啥来着 哥 - 叫什么名字啊
What did you call it again, bro? - What was it called?
说啊
Say it.
"冰城"
Ice Town.
我当时还是个孩子 而当你...
I was a kid. And when you...
你最后上到那个位置然后有...
You end up getting out there and there's a...
我真希望你们现在能看到他的样子
I really wish you guys could see this guy right now.
他都泡在汗里了
He is drenched in sweat.
丰收节还会有小马出现的
There's also going to be ponies at the Harvest Festival.
好了 我们来从混♥蛋♥国家收听听众来电吧
All right. Let's take a caller from Douche Nation.
好的 讲吧 听众
All right. Talk to me, caller.
伙计们你们好啊 正在Eagleton这边儿混♥蛋♥着呢
What's up, guys? Just douching over here in Eagleton.
酷毙
Sweet.
看起来18岁当市长也太年轻了
Seems like 18 is pretty young for a mayor.
你当时多大啊 12岁吗
What were you, like, 12?
有趣...当...
The funny... When...
我猜...
I guess...
幸运的是...
The fortunate...
我们能 就....
Can we just, sort of...
游戏结束 伙计 游戏结束
Game over, man. Game over.
干得漂亮 大哥 那是你第一次和人类交谈吗
Nice job, man. Was that your first time talking to other people?
因为看起来就是那样
Because it came off that way.
你在混♥蛋♥面前让我尴尬了
You embarrassed me in front of The Douche.
对不起 各位 我只是...
I'm sorry, you guys. I just...
我17年都没有处理那些市长的事情了
I haven't had to deal with that mayor stuff for 17 years.
我猜我还没完全走出来
I guess I'm not totally over it.
别担心 只是小小颠簸而已
No worries. Look, it was just a bump in the road.
好吧 - 幸运的是 Leslie车可是全地形车
Okay. - Fortunately, the Leslie-mobile is an all-terrain vehicle.
所以 一切关于Ben的事情都还好
So, everything involving Ben is fine.
我只需要跟你私下聊一件其他事情
I just need to talk to you in private about something different
跟Ben无关
that is not Ben-related.
Ben 干得好
Ben, good job.
你家这孩子是个噩梦
Your boy's a nightmare.
我知道 但我们需要他
I know, but we need him.
如果他们问我们预算的问题 他是我们的数字专家
If they ask us about the budget, he's our numbers guy.
我们应该给一个计算器戴上雷朋眼镜
Well, we should just slap a pair of Ray-Bans on a calculator,
因为那样都会更迷人一点
because that would be way more charming.
我去报纸采访 你和Ben去第四频道
I'll do the newspaper interview. You and Ben do Channel Four.
Perd Hapley是个大软蛋 出来的会是吹捧文章的
Perd Hapley is a big softie. It'll be a puff piece.
他能搞定
He can do it.
所以 你喜欢Pawnee不
So, how are you liking Pawnee?
这里有很多车
There are a lot of cars.
我是说 也没有太多
I mean, not too many.
卡车之类的车 但你知道...
Trucks and stuff. But, you know...
酷哦 聊得好 冰城 - 好吧
Cool. Good talk, Ice Town. - Okay.
哇 谁知道水芹 豆角和核桃
Wow. Who knew that watercress, garbanzo beans and walnuts
味道能互相补充呢
could complement each other so well?
沙拉酱也很棒 对吧
Good dressing, too, right?
亚麻籽和龙舌兰 和鸟食的基本成分一样
Flaxseed and agave. Same basic ingredients as bird feed.
我就要直说了
I'm just going to come right out and say it.
我想要定义你的八卦
I want to define your bagua.
好吧 那是啥
Okay. What's that?
是一个风水术语
It's a feng shui term.
这个房♥子里的能量有点不太新鲜
The energy in this house is a little stale.
但我觉得我能以一种正向的方式重新定义你的流动
But I think I can redefine your flow in a very positive way.
好 我真的不是很在意这些东西的安排
Great. I'm not really attached to the way this stuff is arranged.
或者这些东西本身
Or the stuff itself.
或者这栋房♥子 甚至 真的
Or this house, even, really.
好的 我们来吧
Great, let's do it.
我还表现得不够明显吗
Am I not being obvious enough?
我觉得我已经表现得够明显了
I feel like I'm being obvious.
最新消息 丰收节 更像是"丰收杰"
This just in. Harvest Festival more like "Harvest Bestival."
公园部已种下种子
The Parks Department has planted the seeds,
而现在 到了奖励丰收的时候了
and now, they're harvesting the rewards.
很好 你玩完了吗
Great. You done?
他们会在可乐里加入"乐"的 好的 我玩完了
They'll put the fun in funnel cake. Okay. Now, I'm done.
跟我讲讲Ben Wyatt - 当然
Tell me about Ben Wyatt. - Sure.
他为州政♥府♥工作
He works for the state government,
是来为我们的预算做建议的
and he's been coming to advise us about our budget.
得了吧 Leslie 混♥蛋♥已经把新闻传开了
Come on, Leslie. The Douche blew this story wide open.
Ben Wyatt破产了一个镇然后来到Pawnee
Ben Wyatt bankrupts a town and then comes to Pawnee
来告诉我们怎么花钱
to tell us how to spend our money?
这里没有故事啊 Shauna
There's no story here, Shauna.
他只是个尽职尽责的公务员尽全力
He's just a dedicated civil servant who is doing whatever he can
保证这是最好的丰收节
to make sure that this is the best Harvest Festival ever.
而且他还长得挺养眼的
And he's easy on the eyes, too.
你和他到底是什么关系呢
What exactly is the nature of your relationship with him?
严肃的专业关系 只是朋友
Strictly professional. Just friends.
所以 你们是同事还是朋友
So, are you colleagues or are you friends?
我们是互惠的同事
We are colleagues with benefits.
"我们是上♥床♥的同事"
我们是受到我们也是朋友关系这个"惠"的同事
We're colleagues who benefit from the fact that we're also friends.
抱歉 Shauna 我觉得我该走了
I'm sorry, Shauna. I think I need to go.
但还是 非常感谢
But, thank you so much,
还有 和往常一样 我说的话都不能发表
and as always, everything I said is off the record.
好吗 拜
Okay? Bye.
下一个任务是什么
What's the next task?
我们得给她奶奶写一封生日支票的感谢信
We have to write her grandmother a thank you note for a birthday check.
要写得很好 因为晚了五个月
It has to be really good, too, because it's five months late.
之前从没写过感谢信 这会很有意思的
Never written a thank you note before. This will be fun.
她叫她什么来着
What does she call her?
祖母 不对 阿嬷
Gamma. No. Nanna.
或者嬷嬷 奶娘 之类的
Or Nana. Gizmo. Something like that.
这是给你奶娘的 你应该会觉得写得很好的
This is for your Gizmo. I think you'll find it's pretty good.
"亲爱的April的奶奶..."我说的爷爷
"Dear April's grandmother..." I said grandfather.
啊哦 好吧
Oops. Okay.
"你是个美丽惊人的女人" 男人
"You are a beautiful and amazing woman." Man.
"我希望有一天 我能做到半个你那么好的女人"
"I hope someday, I can become half the woman you are."
他是个男人
He's a man.
"谢谢您500块的支票" 是五块钱
"Thank you for the $500." It was $5.
"请欣赏这张老鼠耗子的CD"他是聋子
"Enjoy the Mouse Rat CD." He is deaf.
好吧 你想让我这么改呢 还是就这样
Okay. Do you want me to make those changes, or is it good?
我们接这下一个采访之前
Before we do this next interview,
有一个小秘密我想分享给你
there's a little secret I want to let you in on.
叫做"Haverford扯淡大♥法♥"
It's called the "Haverford Schmooze."
听着 我只是猝不及防而已 我没事
Look, I was just caught off guard. I'm fine.
三个简单步骤
Three easy steps.
微笑 友好的身体接触 和谄媚
Smile, friendly physical contact and flattery.
"嘿 Perd 你老爸是机械战警吗 因为你手臂壮得跟枪似的"
"Hey, Perd. Was your dad RoboCop? Because your arms are guns."
机械战警的手臂才不是枪
RoboCop didn't have guns for arms.
哦我的天啊 才不是这个重点啊 你个书呆子
Oh, my God. That's so not the point, you nerd.
我只是说说
Just saying.
我们为啥来商场了
Why are we at a mall?
给你买♥♥套新西服
We're getting you a new suit.
这事儿我已经忍♥了够久了
I've let this go on long enough.
我喜欢身上这套 - 你不应该
I like this suit. - You shouldn't,
因为看起来太像垃圾了
because it looks like garbage.
你的西服看起来更像垃圾
Your suit looks more like garbage.
真的吗 - 是啊
Really? - Yeah.
因为Brooks兄弟才不会生产垃圾
公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation
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