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如果摇滚没在孟菲斯诞生
If rock never makes it out of Memphis,
那这些东西就都不存在了
then none of these things exist.
你宠物老鼠的名字 电子吉他
Your pet rat's namesake, electric guitar.
-你的发胶 -我没用发胶 沃利
- Your hair gel. - It's not hair gel, Wally.
是王冠发蜡
It's Royal Crown pomade.
-也有用这的人是 -埃尔维斯·普雷斯利
- It's the same product used by- - Elvis Presley.
看到没 她知道我说的是什么
See, she knows what I'm talking about.
不是 蠢货 你看
No, dodo. Look.
"虽然人口在癔症下降低
"While the population fled in hysterics,
还有一个人留在废墟之中
"one person was left standing in the aftermath,
就是当地青年埃尔维斯·普雷斯利"
a local teen named Elvis Presley."
别告诉我他们毁了猫王
Don't tell me they messed with the King.
他被看到的事逼疯了
Whatever he saw drove him crazy.
他被带到了玻利瓦尔州医院
He was taken to the Bolivar State Hospital.
以治疗精神病
Treated for insanity.
如果孟菲斯在1954年荒废了
If Memphis is abandoned in '54,
那摇滚就不会进入主流视野
then rock doesn't hit the mainstream,
也就意味着没有嚎叫雷
which means there's no Howlin' Ray,
没有小理查德
no Little Richard--
猫王三明治花生酱和用培根肥油炸香蕉
The Elvis sandwich-peanut butter and banana fried in greasy bacon fat.
这是个有远见的人
The man was a visionary.
如果这没出现在时代错误地图上 那...
But if it didn't show up on the anachronism map, then--
达克父女
Darhks.
唯一邪恶到想要杀死摇滚的人
The only people evil enough to wanna kill rock and roll.
我打赌这混♥蛋♥喜欢斯卡音乐
Oh, and I bet you that sick bastard likes ska.
好了 我们去看一下
All right, let's go check this out.
我们需要在发生大恐慌前找到猫王
We need to find Elvis before panic sets in.
猫王的叔叔每周日在锡安教堂进行布教
Elvis Presley's uncle preached at the Church of Zion every Sunday.
那孩子从来不会错过
The boy never missed a service.
你听到她说的了
You heard the lady.
怎么 你们干什么都看着我
What? Why are you staring at me?
在等你做你常做的那件事啊
I dunno, waiting for you to do the thing you do.
什么事
What thing?
你一般会用更活力的方式派我们出任务
You know, you usually send us into the field with a little more pizzazz.
好吧 传奇们 穿上你的礼拜服
All right, Legends, put on your Sunday best,
因为我们要去教堂了
because we are going to church.
挺不错的
That was pretty good.
阿门
Amen!
孟菲斯市 1954年
*耶稣爱我 他会一直*
*Jesus loves me He will stay*
*陪伴在我身边*
*Close beside me all the way*
*他曾为我流血与死亡*
*Thou hast bled and died for me*
这真是让人不舒服
Well, this is uncomfortable,
我说的不只是我的衣服
and I'm not just talking about my dress.
是 我猜这些人没听过"爱你邻居"那段
Yeah, I guess these people didn't get the whole "Love thy neighbor" talk.
-嘘 -嘘你自己去 女士
- Shh! - Shush yourself, lady.
你听到自己的歌♥声了吗
Have you heard your singing voice?
让米克离募捐盘远点就是了
Just keep Mick away from the collection tray.
还有圣餐饼
And the communion wafers.
这不是面包
That's not bread.
有疾病将要降临这小镇
There's a sickness coming over this town.
我今早路过校园时看到了
I see it in the school yard as I pass in the morning.
令我惊恐的是
And to my horror,
我在这个教堂的礼拜日也看到了
I see it in this very church on Sundays.
它感染人们的思想 让人们变得疯狂
It infects the mind. It drives people crazy.
也许这个义愤填膺的教士知道些什么
Maybe the righteous reverend is on to something.
他们称之为摇滚
They call it rock and roll.
我称之为魔鬼的音乐
I call it the devil's music.
我收回 他完全不知道自己在说什么
Nevermind, he has no idea what he's talking about.
现在 我想请出我的侄子 埃尔维斯
Now, I would like to invite my nephew, Elvis,
来为我们演奏并激励你们所有人
to play for us and encourage you all
来参加我们第一届圣歌♥之夜
to attend our first annual Heavenly Night of Hymns.
埃尔维斯
Elvis?
想想我们谈过的 孩子
Remember what we talked about, son.
保持神圣
Keep it godly.
遵命
Yes, ma'am.
你能相信吗
Can you believe this?
猫王现场演出是我们一起看的第一场演出
The first show we see together is Elvis live.
你不是唯一一个兴奋的人
You're not the only one who's excited.
这一首叫做
This one's called...
《前进 基♥督♥士兵们》
"Onward, Christian Soldiers."
好的
Okay.
*前进 基♥督♥士兵们*
*Onward Christian soldiers*
*向战争进军*
*Marching as to war*
这就是摇滚吗
So this is rock and roll?
这不是本尼·古德曼 但...
I mean, it's no Benny Goodman, but...
爵士乐歌♥手
不 我们不是远道而来听猫王唱老奶奶曲的
No, we did not come all this way to listen to Elvis play grandma songs.
*神圣主人耶稣*
*Christ the royal master*
就是这样 埃尔维斯 加点料进去
That's it, Elvis. Put a little sauce on it.
对 变调
Yeah, swivel.
他真帅
He's so cute!
*前进去战场*
*Forward into battle*
她被撒旦附身了
Satan's got ahold of her!
怎么回事
What the hell's going on?
我的图腾在对什么产生反应
Ugh, my totem. It's reacting to something.
走开 撒旦
Be gone, Satan!
我想她是在说我们
Well, I think she's talking to us.
走吧
Come on.
用你们的双眼注视眼前的事
Behold what you have seen with your very eyes!
在这上帝的屋檐下见证
Witnessed in this house of God!
那是撒旦的行为
That is the act of Satan!
是的 没错
Yes, it is.
猫王三明治
The Elvis sandwich.
我猜埃尔维斯是摇滚之王
I guess Elvis is the King of rock and roll.
屁♥股♥一摆 Z就被迷倒了
One hip shake, and Z loses it.
是啊 可不是嘛 姐妹
Yeah, tell me about it, sister.
我不是因为埃尔维斯的屁♥股♥失去控制
I didn't lose control because of Elvis' hips.
我也没有
Yeah, me, either.
我的图腾在闪 埃尔维斯的吉他也是
My totem was glowing, and so was Elvis' guitar.
那就意味这埃尔维斯是...
But that means that Elvis is--
是的 猫王是个图腾拥有者
Yep. Elvis is a totem bearer.
所以猫王是失踪已久的第六个图腾的拥有者
So Elvis is the bearer of the long lost sixth totem.
我全身来劲
Consider me all shook up.
[猫王的歌♥曲]
所以他得加入我们 对吧
So he has to join the team, right?
-不 -如果我们没有一整套图腾
- No. - I mean, we can't defeat Mallus
我们可打不过马卢斯
unless we have a full set.
我们可以让吉迪恩给他造条闪亮的连衣裤
I mean, we could get Gideon to fabricate him a spangly jumpsuit,
他穿得一定很合身
and he'll fit right in.
什么图腾会选带吉他的唱诗班男孩做主人
What totem would choose a guitar-toting choir boy as its bearer?
还不明显吗
Isn't it obvious?
这可是猫王
It's Elvis we're talking about.
-一定是... -是个三明治图腾
- It's gotta be-- - A sandwich totem.
我本来想说音乐的
I was gonna say music.
想想音乐图腾能为我的高音部做些什么
Just imagine what the music totem would do for my upper register.
我终于可以在剧院风光一把了
I could finally give local theater a shot.
前提是 我们先用它打败马卢斯
That is, after we use it to destroy Mallus.
所以我们得用美妙的和声
So we're gonna vanquish a time demon
去消灭一个时间恶魔 真棒
with our killer harmonies. It's gonna go great.
每个图腾在马卢斯的威胁下都会变强
Every totem is growing stronger in response to Mallus' threat.
万一那个牧师说的没错
What if the preacher was right
猫王的音乐真的会使孟菲斯发疯呢
and Elvis' music literally drives Memphis insane?
那我们就得在它真正发生之前弄到图腾
Then we have to get it before that happens.
弄到了 猫王的吉他图腾
I got it. Elvis' guitar totem.
我不是唯一一个觉得这很烦的人对吧
So, I'm not the only one who finds that annoying, right?
-真的很烦 -那就好
- So annoying. - Yeah.
好了 我们能出发了对吧
Okay, come on. We're good to go, right?
能吗
Are we?
猫王还没录他的第一首单曲呢
'Cause Elvis hasn't recorded his first single yet.
没了那把吉他 他可能永不会录了
And without that guitar, he may never record it.
然后摇滚历史从此就...
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