糟糕历史（2009）
Horrible Histories S05E12
Part 3
Jan. 2, 2021, 3:18 p.m.
Cheers, mate.
我等不及了
Oh, I can't wait!
想象一下作为施工队的一份子
Imagine actually being part of the team
去建造埃及崭新的首都
that builds Egypt's brand-new capital city,
平地而起的培尔-拉美西斯
Pi-Ramesses, from virtually nothing.
占地七平方英里 内有大厦 寺庙 运河
Seven square miles of mansions, temples, canals,
湖泊 雕像 以及三十万人的房♥子
lakes, statues and houses for 300,000 people!
希望我能分到金字塔施工队里
I hope I get on a pyramid team.
好了 法老雕像队 再见 老兄
All right, pharaoh statue. Cheers, mate.
或者方尖碑队 有的方尖碑令人惊叹
Or a needle. Some of those needles are amazing.
高五十英尺 重两百公吨♥
50 foot high, 200 tonnes.
我都等不及要告诉老家的人
I can't wait to tell everyone back home about this.
欧拉神庙 再见 老兄 下一位
Temple Oorah. Thanks, mate. Next.
老大你好 我迫不及待了
All right, chief? I am raring to go,
只要把锤子放在我手里
so just put a hammer in my hand
再给我指指方向
and point me in the direction of the...
马粪坑
Horse toilets.
他们确实造了马粪坑
马粪坑吗
Horse toilets?
马粪坑
Horse toilets.
马粪坑吗
Horse toilet?
就是马去拉...
Yeah, it's where horses go...
我知道马粪坑是啥
I know what it is, mate!
我背井离乡 一路走来这里
I left my family hundreds of miles away and walked here.
还得雇奴隶来照料我的农田
I had to hire slaves to look after my farm
就为了参与拉姆西斯二世华丽的工程
so I could be part of Ramesses II's magnificent project
有些埃及人真的这么做
可你却要我去建
and you want me to build a...
马粪坑
horse toilet.
我会被笑死的
I'll be a laughing stock!
造马粪坑没什么不光彩的
There's nothing wrong with building a horse toilet, right?
过来看看我们的成品
Come and have a look at the first one we done.
你瞧瞧
Look at that, heh?
多年的工程
Years of engineering
还有一些天才参与设计
and genius have gone into designing that, yeah?
这些柱子把马匹围在这里
The pillars hold the horse in place,
准确地给它们定位
perfectly positioning it
马匹就会在坑里拉屎了
so it can do its business in the hole.
想象一下吧
Imagine it, yeah?
法老的骑兵 一万匹马
The pharaoh's cavalry, 10,000 horses,
同时在我们面前上厕所
all going to the toilet at once in front of us.
我宁可不去想象
I'd rather not.
这样不仅更卫生
Well, not only is it cleaner,
还方便我们收集马尿
but we're also collecting all the horse wee
好用于鞣皮革
to help tan the leather,
他们真的这么做
制♥造♥盔甲和武器
to make the armour, the weapons.
你的马粪坑 老兄
Your horse toilet, mate,
会帮助埃及成为世界强国
is helping make Egypt the powerhouse of the world.
我从没想过这种事
I've never thought of it like that.
这些马粪坑很棒 我接了
These horse toilets are amazing! I'll do it.
很好 老兄
Good on you, mate.
谢谢 只是如果有人问起
Thanks. Only, if anyone asks...
我会告诉他们你是狮身人面像施工队的
Oh, I'll tell them you're working on the Sphinx.
多谢 回头见
Thank you. Cheers.
回头见 那就这样
Ta, ta. All right.
就这样 我可以开始了
All right. I can get started.
非马止步
Oh, horses only!
抱歉
Oh, sorry.
不可思议
Unbelievable!
棘手的二十世纪
糟糕历史电视台
新闻联播
大家好 欢迎收看《那时新闻》
Hello and welcome to the News at When.
那时就是约七十年前
When? Around 70 years ago
当时的美国和苏联
when the United States of America and the Soviet Union,
也就是以今天的俄♥罗♥斯♥为中心
centred around modern-day Russia,
两国决定以只应天上有的方式
decided to try and settle the growing argument over
来尝试解决关于哪国最优越
who was superior in a way
这个不断蔓延的争论
that was quite literally out of this world.
星空故事的详细内容 请看本台记者
Here with more details on this starry story
我们自己的太空男鲍勃·黑尔
is our very own Space Cadet, Bob Hale,
带来的太空竞赛详细报道 鲍勃
with this Space Race report. Bob.
谢谢你 萨姆
Thank you, Sam.
那是1945年
Well, the year is 1945,
第二次世界大战刚刚结束
World War II has just ended,
在被迫做了几年的战友之后
and after years of having to be battle buddies,
美国和苏联
America and the Soviet Union
终于可以直面
can now finally embrace the fact
他们不怎么喜欢对方这一事实
that they don't much like each other.
这两个超级大国治理国家的方式
You see, these two superpowers run their countries
有天壤之别 就是粉笔和奶酪
in very different ways called Chalk and Cheese.
我指的是共♥产♥主义和资本主义
...err, I mean Communism and Capitalism...
并且已经开始了互相猜疑
...so have grown to distrust each other intensely.
可幸运的是 他们双方
But luckily, both of them
俘获了一些德国火箭科学专家
captured some of the German rocket scientists
这些人可是帮希♥特♥勒♥造过导弹的
who built Hitler's wartime missiles,
于是产生了激动人心的竞争方式
which suggests a rather exciting way to settle which superpower is best.
就是火箭包长矛赛
Rocket pack jousting.
不是吗 好吧
No? OK, then.
那么使用导弹技术
How about using missile technology
把人送入太空 怎么样
to put a man into space?
人+火箭=太空旅行
太空竞赛开始了 取得领先优势的是
Yes, the space race is on with an early lead going to...
美国
America!
为了知道生物是否能够在太空旅行中生存
Who, to find out if it's possible for living creatures to survive space travel,
他们开始把猴子 狗
start firing monkeys, dogs,
老鼠和犀牛送入太空 当然没有犀牛
mice and rhinos into outer space, though not rhinos.
而苏联方面紧随其后
And with the Soviets following suit,
很快将许多动物送上了星光灿烂的天空
soon loads of animals are sent off into starry skies,
其中的很多一去不回
with many of them never coming back.
我猜它们喜欢待在上面 什么
I guess they liked it up there... What?
好吧 安息吧伙计们
Oh, right. Rest in peace, guys.
安息吧
无论如何 现在竞争开始激烈起来
Anyway, now the race really starts hotting up,
双方都在向下一个里程碑冲刺
as both sides rush towards the next major milestone,
就是将人造飞船送入近地轨道
putting an man-made craft into orbit around the Earth,
而这回 得分的一方是
with the points, this time, going to...
苏联
the Soviets!
是的 1957年 斯普特尼克一号♥
Yes, in 1957, Sputnik One,
一个沙滩球大小的无线电航♥空♥信标成了...
a radio beacon the size of a beach ball becomes the...
谢谢 很有帮助 怎么这样
Thank you. Really helpful, honestly.
没错 斯普特尼克一号♥成为了第一颗人造卫星
Yes, Sputnik becomes the first ever satellite,
但美国并没有落后太多
but America's not far behind,
1958年 他们发射了探险者一号♥
and in 1958, they launched Explorer One,
它大概有一个西柚那么大
which is about the size of a grapefruit.
你想都别想
Don't even think about it.
目前双方打成平手
And while it's even Stevens score wise,
苏联势如破竹
the Soviets are now on a roll.
他们发射了一颗环绕月球的无人火箭
They send an unmanned rocket right round the moon,
并发射探测器拍摄了月球的表面画面
launch a probe to photograph its surface and,
1961年
in 1961,
莫斯科欢迎您
在用假人测试成功之后
after successful tests using a dummy...
是的 很搞笑
Yes, very funny...
苏联人尤里·加加林成为太空第一人
Russia's Yuri Gagarin becomes the first ever man in space
而美国人开始厌倦屈居亚军 因此
and America starts getting pretty sick of second place. So,
1961年 美国总统约翰·F·肯尼迪宣布
in 1961, US President John F Kennedy announces that
美国要挑战极限 送人登月
America will attempt the impossible, to put a man on the moon.
正因为这事不容易 所以才要知难而上
"Not because it is easy, but because it is hard."
这跟我想给烤箱定时
The exact same reason why
出于同样的原因
I keep trying to set the clock on my oven.
因此新的火箭系列 俗称阿波罗计划
So a new series of rockets, known as the Apollo Programme,
为"光腚"而生
are dedicated to mooning.
我指的是登月计划 但模拟发射时的大火
Err, err, I mean the moon landing. But disaster strikes
糟糕历史（2009）
Horrible Histories
剧集 | 糟糕历史（2009） | 导航列表