糟糕历史（2009）

Horrible Histories S05E02

Part 5 Jan. 2, 2021, 3:15 p.m.

Behold, the head of Mary Queen of S...
没想到她还戴了假发
Oh! Yeah, didn't know she wore a wig.
还好这是唯一一次发生了囧事的
Yeah, luckily that's the only time anything embarrassing
斩首仪式
has happened in an execution.
汝被拍了
好吧可能不是唯一一次
Well, maybe not the only time.
玛格丽特·玻尔索尔兹伯里女伯爵
Margaret Pole, Countess of Salisbury,
你有什么遗言吗
do you have any last words?
是的
Yes.
你抓不住我
You can't catch me.
说到四处逃生
Yeah, talk about running for your life!
他的确抓住了她
He does catch her,
不过在那之前他挥了11下斧头
but it takes 11 swings of the axe.
汝被拍了
年轻的亨利八世在这里
Young Henry VIII here
为大家展示一下早期的撑杆跳
demonstrating an early form of the pole vault.
他年轻时经常干这样的恶作剧
He was always up to mischief like this when he was younger.
陛下您确定这么做合适吗
Are you sure this is wise your majesty?
别唧唧歪歪的沃尔西
Oh, stop fussing, Wolsey.
你继续录像
Keep filming, you.
好了我要跳过这条溪
Right, I'm going to own this stream.
先助跑再撑杆
You've got your run up, your dump.
然后头朝下掉进污水河里
Yeah, and your plummet head first into a muddy stream.
太经典了
Textbook, yeah,
距小溪对面还有两英尺远
looks like he missed the other side by two feet.
就是这样
Yeah.
汝被拍了
离别可以像这样既甜蜜又忧伤
Parting can be such sweet sorrow.
可能也很痛苦
It can be a pain, too,
特别是当你遵循都铎传统
especially when you follow the Tudor tradition
朝出游者砸鞋子的时候
of throwing a shoe after the traveller.
好了亲爱的冷静
All right, love, steady on.
砸一只鞋子是代表好运而不是一百只
It's good luck to throw one shoe, not hundreds!
广♥告♥后一同来看
Join us after the break
亨利八世因为剃胡子
when Henry VIII nearly causes a diplomatic incident
差点引发外交事故
by shaving his beard off.
华丽的乔治王朝
乔治王朝出了许多伟大的诗人和作家
In Georgian times, there were lots of great poets and authors
比如简·奥斯汀拜伦勋爵
like Jane Austen, Lord Byron
以及杰出的玛丽·雪莱
and the brilliant Mary Shelley.
糟糕历史电影展销会
玛丽·雪莱项目
你好我叫玛丽·雪莱
Hello, my name's Mary Shelley
我认为我的一本书应该能拍成一部好电影
and I have written a book that i believe would make a great movie.
少来了不要浪费我们的时间
Oh please, don't waste our time.
我们这有个叫J·K·罗琳的女人
We had a woman in here called JK Rowling
和你说的一样
saying the same thing.
我们把她丢出去后她就再没工作过
We threw her out, she never worked again.
其实他们拍的那几部电影
Actually they made those movies,
是史上最成功的电影系列
it's the most successful film series of all time.
我爱伏地魔我说了他的名字
I love Lord Voldemort. I said his name!
也许我们应该听你说说
OK, maybe we should listen then.
开始吧雪莱·玛丽
OK, shoot, Shelley Mary.
-是玛丽·雪莱 -随便吧
- Mary Shelley. - Whatever.
好吧一次我与我的未婚夫
Right, I was spending the weekend with my soon-to-be-husband
在瑞士日内瓦湖边的房♥子渡周末
at a house in Lake Geneva in Switzerland
那是拜伦勋爵的府邸
as a guest of Lord Byron.
-狐假虎威 -哐当
- Uh-oh, name dropper! - Clang.
我讨厌爱显摆认识名人的人
I hate name droppers
我的好朋友布拉德·皮特也一样
and so does my good friend, Brad Pitt.
布拉德·皮特
Brad Pitt!
总而言之
Well, anyway, er,
远东的一座火山刚刚爆发
a huge volcano had recently erupted in the Far East,
导致天气反常
causing freak weather
不详的黑暗笼罩欧洲
and an ominous darkness across Europe,
这正是讲恐怖故事的绝佳时刻
which was the perfect conditions for telling horror stories.
我有个恐怖故事要说就是这场会谈
I got a horror story for you - this meeting!
不不有一天晚上我们比赛
No, no, one night we had a competition
看谁编的恐怖故事最吓人
to see who could make up the scariest horror story,
其中一位客人波利多里先生
and one guest, Mr Polladory,
创作了第一篇英文吸血鬼故事
came up with the first vampire story in English.
但我的故事比他的更胜一筹
But my story was even better than his story,
因此我把它叫作"现代普罗米修斯"
so I called it the Modern Prometheus,
更通俗的叫法是"弗兰肯斯坦"
or to call it it's more common name, Frankenstein.
弗兰肯斯坦是你写的吗
You wrote Frankenstein?
-我是弗兰肯斯坦 -他还活着
- I am Frankenstein! - He's alive!
你们听说过我的故事吗
You've heard my story?
你的故事已经拍成电影了
Your story has been made into a film already.
拍了不计其数部
Like about a zillion times.
有弗兰肯斯坦
There's, er, Frankenstein.
-《弗兰肯斯坦》 -《弗兰肯斯坦》
- Frankenstein. - Frankenstein.
-《新科学怪人》 -《科学怪人的新娘》
- Young Frankenstein. - Bride of Frankenstein.
-《怪鸭历险记》 -不那是另一个人
- Count Duckula. - No, that's the other guy.
瞧大家已经厌倦了
You see, everyone is sick and tired of
你的弗兰肯斯坦怪物
your monster, Frankenstein.
但我的怪物不叫弗兰肯斯坦
Yeah, but my monster isn't called Frankenstein,
那是博士的名字维克多·冯·弗兰肯斯坦
that's the doctor's name - Victor Von Frankenstein.
那你的怪物叫什么
So what's your monster called?
伏地魔我又说了一次
Voldemort... I said it again!
叫亚当
It... it's Adam.
玛丽·雪莱的怪物叫亚当
-亚当 -怪物亚当
- Adam? - Adam... the monster?
-我不害怕 -我不害怕
- I'm not scared. - I'm not scared.
我有点害怕
I'm a bit scared.
改编成浪漫喜剧
Would it play as a romcom,
友好的怪物邻居亚当怎么样
Adam the friendly neighbourhood monster?
他所到之处尽是女孩尖叫声
Girls scream wherever he goes,
让贾斯汀·比伯来演
I'm thinking Justin Bieber.
贾斯汀贾斯汀
Justin! Justin!
我的书是一部严肃的文学作品
Er, my book is a serious work of literature
关于一个扮演上帝的人关于灵魂
about man playing God, about the soul and,
和那种叫作"电"的新奇事物
and this new exciting thing called electricity.
知道你的电影有什么问题吗
You know the problem with your movie?
-臭弗兰肯 -票房♥毒药斯坦
- It frankenstinks. - It's a flopenstein.
我根本不必忍♥受你们的冷嘲热讽
I don't have to put up with this actually.
我走了你们你们都是怪物
I'm leaving. You, you're all monsters.
你永远也别想离开这座城♥堡♥
You'll never leave this castle!
怪物们她要跑了
Monsters, she's getting away!
-不要碰我西装 -抱歉
- Don't touch the suit. - Sorry.
玛丽·雪莱的好朋友
Mary Shelley's good friend
著名诗人拜伦勋爵是个动物爱好者
the famous poet Lord Byron was an animal lover,
但以下哪些曾被他当做宠物
but which of these did he have as a pet?
A 獾
A: A Badger
B 鹰
B: An Eagle
C 熊
C: A Bear
答案是
The answer is...
三个都是
all three.
拜伦还把孔雀鹅和猴子当作宠物
Byron also kept peacocks, geese and monkeys as pets.
他很奇怪脸色苍白富有贵族气息
He was a strange man, pale, aristocratic,
对黑暗和哥特事物感兴趣
and interested in dark, gothic things.
有点像吸血鬼
A bit like a vampire!
危险
当危险潜伏于黑暗世界时
When danger lurks in a world of darkness,
黑暗
它就害怕黎明
it's right to be scared of the twilight.
有人在吗
Hello, is there anybody there?
我在找拜伦勋爵的府邸
I'm looking for the house of the Lord Byron.
把窗帘拉上阳光让我难受
Ah, close the curtains. The light, it hurts me.
拜伦勋爵你吓坏我了
Lord Byron, you frightened me.
很好
Good.
拜伦勋爵是暗夜魔鬼吗
Is Lord Byron a creature of the night?
暗夜魔鬼
为什么拜伦勋爵你变成了一匹狼
Why - Lord Byron, you've turned into a wolf.
不那真是一匹狼
No, it's an actual wolf.
是我的宠物
He's my pet.
太危险了