糟糕历史（2009）

Horrible Histories S05E10

Part 5 Jan. 2, 2021, 3:17 p.m.

Two, four, eight, six, we want more mathematics.
-小声点 -抱歉
- Shuuush. - Sorry.
这仅是他个人的诉求我们大家的要求是
That one's just his demand. This is the main one.
2 4 6 8 反对体罚
Two, four, six, eight, no more caning would be great.
我们受够了毒打
We've had enough of being beaten.
学生们抗♥议♥体罚
我们忍♥无可忍♥了我们要表明态度
Well, we're not taking any more, we're making a stand.
格里菲斯你说得够多了
Griffiths, you've made your point.
赶快回学校否则有你好看
Now get back to school or there'll be serious trouble.
其他人也一样快点
And that goes for the rest of you as well. Come on.
把"我再也不罢♥课♥了"写一百遍
Write out 100 times, "I must not strike."
我是《糟糕新闻》的詹妮弗·汤森
This is Jennifer Townsend reporting for HH TV News,
我要加薪我要减负
demanding better pay and shorter hours.
一会儿来找我汤小姐
See me afterwards, Townsend.
还我鼠权
我要啥残羹冷饭
What do I want? More rotten food.
啥时要现在
When do I want it? Now.
第一次学生罢♥课♥发生在威尔士的拉内利
Yes, the first schoolboy strike was in Llanelli in Wales.
没能持续多久
It didn't last very long,
却在英国掀起一股盲从的校园罢♥课♥潮
but set off copycat school strikes all round Britain.
二十世纪初很游♥行♥抗♥议♥
Yeah, they loved a good protest in the early 1900s.
伦敦唐宁街
什么事
May I help you?
是唐宁街十号♥吗
Er, 10 Downing Street?
这还用问吗
Yeah.
这是给阿斯奎斯首相的包裹
Delivery for Prime Minister Asquith.
阿斯奎斯首相
Prime Minister Asquith.
你给首相送什么来了
So what have you got for the PM?
就这两个包裹
Er, just these two packages.
我猜里面是女权主义者
Let me guess, it's a couple of suffragettes
想以此吸引公众的眼球
trying to pull another publicity stunt.
不才不是呢
No, we're not.
妇女选举权妇女选举权
Votes for women, votes for women,
女权主义者把自己邮递到唐宁街
妇女选举权
votes for women!
我就知道
I thought so.
又是女权主义者应该把你们关起来
Suffragettes. I should have you both locked up.
你凭什么
Well, you can't.
用皇家邮政自己邮自己
It's perfectly legal to
一点都不犯法不是吗
have oneself posted via Royal Mail, isn't it?
自己邮自己是合法的
是不犯法就是我的后背犯疼
Yeah, only my poor back's got issue with it.
怎么样绝对合法
You see, perfectly legal.
我们怎么样也要和首相碰个头
Anyway, we needed to engineer a meeting with the PM somehow
跟他说说修改法律的事
in order to speak to him about getting the law changed
让妇女拥有选举权
so that women have the right to vote.
妇女选举权
Votes for women.
妇女直到1918年才得到选举权
还我妇女选举权还我妇女选举权
Votes for women, votes for women,
还我妇女选举权
votes for women!
你们要是想和首相会面
If you want a meeting with the Prime Minister,
得通过合法渠道申请
you have to apply through the correct channels.
以便他拒绝见我们吗
What, so he can refuse to see us?
当然了你们是女人
Of course. You're women.
首相有什么必要讨好你们
What would be the point in the Prime Minister keeping you happy?
你们又不能助他连任因为你们不能投票
Can't get him re-elected, you haven't got the right to vote.
所以我们才示♥威♥
Well, that's the whole point.
妇女选举权
Votes for women.
我们要妇女选举权妇女选举权
Votes for women, votes for women, votes for women!
好吧女士们
Actually, you know what,
恭喜你们成功修改了法律
you are going to get the law changed.
真的
Seriously?
现在开始活人寄送服务将被视为非法
We're going to make it illegal to send people in the mail.
他们确实这样做过
邮递员请寄回给发件人
Postie, return to sender, please.
反正我们尝试了
Oh, well, it was worth a try.
妇女选举权
Votes for women, votes for...
恐怖的都铎王朝
现实版都铎大盗
我负责骗
I'm a villain.
我负责盗
I'm a vagrant.
我以前负责偷
And I used to be a pickpocket.
直到被人抓到切掉了手
Until they caught him and chopped his hands off.
真实的都铎惩罚
哪壶不开提哪壶
Bring that up, why don't you?
欢迎收看《现实版都铎大盗》
And this is Real Tudor Hustle,
由真实的都铎犯人
the show where real Tudor criminals
为您演绎真实的都铎骗局
show you real Tudor scams.
-你干吗呢 -你干吗呢
- What you doing? - What you doing?
咱不应该是贼鼠一窝吗
Supposed to be my mate.
接下来
这位大婶
This fopdoodle thinks
以为自己买♥♥回家的是只丰乳肥臀的肉鸡
she's bought herself a nice plump chicken.
丰乳肥臀因为我把鸡屁♥股♥缝了起来
Nice and plump cos I sewed its bottom up,
所以鸡肚子里全是便便
so now it's full of poo.
真实的都铎骗局
好吃吗崩你一脸屎
Fit to eat? It's fit to burst!
现实版都铎大盗
这些人头脑太简单
These cod's heads make it all too easy
所以经典的都铎骗局都能得逞
when we pull this classic Tudor scam.
女士们先生们
Erm, ladies and gentleman,
这一带有小偷
there are pickpockets operating in the area,
请大家检查下自己的财物好了
so could you all check your valuables, please. All right.
现在小偷们就知道
Now the thieves know exactly
这也是真实的都铎骗局
大家的财物都放在哪了
where everyone's keeping their valuables.
现实版都铎大盗
陌生女人登门造访
A strange woman calls at your house
自称是精灵女王的朋友
and says she's friends with the Fairy Queen.
是不是觉得不太现实
Sounds too good to be true.
确实不现实
It is.
这位是朱迪思·朵儿·菲利普斯
This is Judith Doll Phillips,
都铎时期臭名昭著的骗子
a notorious Tudor con artist,
她即将造访下一位受害者
and she's about to call on her next victim.
你好我是精灵女王的朋友
Hello, I'm a friend of the Fairy Queen.
快进来快进来
Oh. Well, I suppose you'd better come in then.
她就这样轻易地进去了
Having easily talked her way into the house,
接下来好戏上场了
next, Judith has a proposition.
我感觉这个屋子里有黄金
Oh, now, I'm sensing there is gold in the house?
没错没错我有很多黄金制品
Yes, yes, there is, I've got lots of gold things.
我的意思是有私藏的黄金
Yes, but I'm sensing there is secret gold,
你不知道的黄金
there is gold here that you don't know about.
她就是这样欺骗别人的
我可以帮你找到这些黄金
Now, I could find it for you,
但是我需要你
but I'll need you to go
把所有你知道的黄金找出来
and get all the gold that you do know about
堆到地上行吗
and put it in a pile on the floor. OK?
请去那边坐好闭上眼睛
Just go and sit over there and close your eyes, all right?
好的
Ok.
她就是这样得逞的
可以睁眼了吗
Can I open them yet?
现实版都铎大盗
谨记在没有执法人员在场的情况下
So remember, with no law keepers around,
一定得睁大双眼
you've got to keep your glaziers open,
因为如果有人想卖♥♥只鸡给你
cos if someone's trying to sell you a chicken
而他头上又刻有字母F
and they've got a big "F" on their forehead,
这个F可不是代表"放养鸡"
it probably don't stand for free range.
重罪犯头上刻有字母F
可不是吗你在干吗
Isn't that right, me old... What are you doing?
-你在干吗 -不要不要
- What are you doing? - No, no, no!
都铎时期犯罪盛行
Crime was rife in Tudor times.
甚至还有犯罪学校
There were even criminal training schools
专门教人怎样偷东西
where you could be taught how to be a pickpocket.
想想就好玩罪犯的学校
Hey, imagine that, a school for criminals.
不捣蛋才会受到惩罚
You'd get in trouble for not being naughty!
但是如果你犯罪被抓住了
Anyway, if you were caught committing a crime,
都铎当局可是很喜欢留下些记号♥的
the Tudor authorities really left their mark.
请进
Come.
你是谁
And you are?
爱德华·行动者
Edward Doit.