糟糕历史（2009）
Horrible Histories S05E11
Part 2
Jan. 2, 2021, 3:18 p.m.
这不是玩具
This is no toy.
这是地府最新流行的交通工具
This is the very latest in underworld transport.
船一到来世就会变成正常尺寸
In the afterlife, it turns into a full-sized boat
这些奴隶模型则会变成真正的奴隶
and these model slaves become real slaves,
为他效力 干体力活
to do the hard work for you.
来一个 好啦 这事解决了
I'll take it. Right, that's that sorted.
他们真的相信这玩意儿
旅途很漫长 他需要一些食物
And the journey is a long one, he'll be needing some food.
这款经木乃伊处理的肉自备小棺材
This mummified meat comes in its own coffin.
好吧 但我只买♥♥这些
Oh, all right, but that's definitely it.
蜡发胶 特別为木乃伊而制
Wax hair gel. Especially made for mummies.
所有这些都是真实的陪葬品
死后的岁月是无尽的
The afterlife is forever,
你也想你叔叔以最佳形象示人
you want your uncle to look his best.
我并没有那么喜欢他 可是...
I didn't like him that much, but you know...
经木乃伊处理的猫 非常受欢迎
Mummified cat, they're very popular.
巫沙布提俑
Ushabti dolls.
乐器 魔砖
Musical instruments, magical bricks.
终于到了葬礼这天
Finally, it's the day of the funeral.
别和尸身说
但法迪尔的妻子会赞成他的选择吗
But will Fadil's wife approve of his choices?
会让不受欢迎的叔叔得到应得的葬礼吗
And will her unpopular uncle get the send-off he deserves?
法迪尔 这场葬礼你筹办得很好
Wow, Fadil, you've actually done a great job.
我原认为埃蒙叔叔非常不受欢迎
To think I thought Uncle Amon was really unpopular.
这是他的墓室
This is his burial chamber.
埃蒙叔叔在那边
Uncle Amon had a massive,
为自己建造了一个巨大华丽的陵墓
ornate burial tomb made for himself over there.
我们走错方向了
We're going the wrong way.
没错 计划做了些许改变
Oh, no, there's been a slight change of plan.
我相当喜欢埃蒙叔叔墓室的样子
You see, I rather like the look of Uncle Amon's tomb,
把他葬到这个比较小的地洞里
so I thought we'd move him to this smaller underground hole
我们死后就能葬到他那个墓穴里啦
and then we can have his one when we die.
当时人们的确抢夺家族成员的墓穴
埃蒙叔叔
Uncle Amon!
如果我们抢了他的墓穴
If we steal his tomb,
他的朋友不会感到气愤吗
won't all his friends be furious?
不会的 这不成问题
Oh, no, no, that's not a problem.
不会的 看我的
No, watch this!
好了 非常感谢大家 你们可以走了
OK, thanks very much, everyone, you can go now.
一切顺利
All the best.
很好 原来如此 既然这样
Right, I see. Well, in that case,
我们把他丢进这洞里吧
let's bung him in the hole!
我们关于古埃及人的大多数认识
Much of what we know about the ancient Egyptians
都是从他们的陵墓和寺庙
comes from their tombs and temples
以及墙上那些复杂的象形文字里得知的
and from the complicated hieroglyphic writing on the walls.
尼罗河谷游戏公♥司♥出品 象形拼字游戏
象形拼字游戏
Hieroglabble,
是以象形文字为基础 新颖的文字游戏
it's the great new hieroglyph-based word game
适合全家老少
for all the family.
-到你了 -我不行
- Your go. - I can't go.
-为什么 -因为我看不懂象形文字
- Why not? - I can't read hieroglyphs.
我也看不懂
Me, neither
就算在古埃及也几乎无人能看懂
and neither can virtually anyone else in ancient Egypt.
象形拼字游戏
Hieroglabble,
尼罗河谷游戏公♥司♥出品 象形拼字游戏
是新颖的古埃及文字游戏
it's the great new ancient Egyptian word game
其实除了祭司 没人能玩
for virtually no-one except the priesthood,
因为他们是唯一
because they're the only people
能看得懂象形文字的人
who can understand hieroglyphs.
到你了
Your go.
猫头鹰 狮子 篮子 角蝰
Oh, owl, lion, basket, horned viper.
你输了二十四分
24 points, please.
你不能只因为图案看起来像个单词
You can't just go chucking any picture down,
就把它扔在这上面
just because it sounds like a word!
你没看过规则吗
Have you not read the rules?
警告 象形文字的组合需要学习数年
Warning, hieroglyph combinations will take years to learn.
从五岁起 除了学象形文字
I've done nothing but learn hieroglyphics
我什么也不做 结果我却和你一起玩
since the age of five and I end up playing with you.
真是浪费我的时间 滚蛋
You're a waste of time. Shove off.
全新的高级版象形拼字游戏即将上市
And coming soon - new Advanced Hieroglabble,
高级版象形拼字冒险游戏
并加入了所有希腊罗马后期的文字
with all the glyphs from the later Greco-Roman period,
这意味着约有五千种不同的牌供你娱乐
meaning you can play with around 5,000 different tiles.
五千种不同的牌
我们需要个更大的拼版
We're going to need a bigger board.
象形拼字游戏
Hieroglabble,
来自尼罗河谷的全新游戏
the new game from Nile Valley
全新改进版象形拼字游戏
几乎无人能玩
that almost no-one can play.
腐朽古罗马
老普里尼
愚蠢的死法之
死得傻呀死得傻*
*Stupid deaths, stupid deaths
真人真事乐哈哈*
*They're funny cos they're true
死得傻呀死得傻*
*Stupid deaths, stupid deaths
下次不要到你家*
*Hope next time, it's not you
你的脑子是从鼻孔里取出来的
Your brain was removed through your nose. Hmm.
这说明了很多问题 下一位
Certainly explains a lot. Next!
你是谁
And you are?
我是老普里尼 罗马军事指挥官
Pliny the Elder - Roman Military Commander,
作家 哲学家 自然学家
author, philosopher and naturalist.
我对自然和地理现象
I am greatly interested in natural
有着非常浓厚的兴趣
and geographic phenomenon,
事实上我还写了自己的书卷
so much so that I've actually written my own scroll
叫作《博物志》
- Naturalis Historia.
不准在我的节目上做书籍广♥告♥
No book plugs on my show.
-各大书卷商店均有销♥售♥ -赶快住口
- Available in all good scroll shops. - Hey, now!
总之 我当时指挥的一支罗马舰队
Anyway, I was in charge of a Roman fleet
驻扎在维苏威火山附近
based near the volcano, mount Vesuvius.
维苏威火山不就是那座爆发
Isn't Mount Vesuvius the volcano that erupted
并摧毁罗马古城庞贝的火山吗
and destroyed the Roman city of Pompeii?
-正是那座 -射击 进球得分
- The very same. - He shoots, he scores a goal!
我感觉到火山震动
I felt the tremors from the volcano
带着我的舰队去调查
and I took my fleet to investigate.
迎接我们的是火山爆发的
We were greeted by the most spectacular sight
无比壮观景象
of the volcano erupting.
你见过此景吗
Have you ever seen one?
没有 可是这位木乃伊有些不耐烦了
No. But, erm, mummy here does have a bit of a temper.
-怎么了 -那绝对是激动人心的一刻
- What? - Well, it is absolutely breathtaking.
当我接到我的一个朋友
I ordered my galley to evacuate the locals,
求救的消息时
when I received a message
我命令我的舰队疏散当地群众
from a friend of mine asking to be rescued.
我上了一艘较小的快艇
So, I took a smaller, faster vessel,
以便尽快靠岸
in order to try to reach the shore as quickly as possible.
火山渣和浮石
Cinders and pumice
开始像雨点一样打在我们身上
began to rain down upon us,
以致我的舵手因为担心我们的安全
so much so that my helmsman feared for our safety
建议我们掉头
and advised us to turn around.
我对他说 天佑勇者
To which I said, "Fortune favours the brave."
我知道这句话 是谁说的来着
Oh! I know that saying. Now who was it that said it?
我 我说的
Me. I said it.
你 你说的 我就知道 真的知道
You, you said it. I knew that, I did. Shh.
我们一上岸
Once we were ashore
风就大到我们没法掉头离开
the wind became so strong that we couldn't leave.
我因火山喷出的烟雾中毒身亡
And I died of toxic poisoning from the volcano fumes.
天佑勇者吗
"Fortune favours the brave"?
火山佑怯者吧 老兄
Volcanoes favour the cowardly, mate.
是的 的确是
Well, yes, they do.
老普里尼吗 更像傻普里尼
Pliny the Elder? Pliny the Plonker more like.
我今天太有创意了 别见怪
Oh, I'm on fire today. No offence.
你可以去投胎了
You're through to the afterlife.
这个留给你
I'll just leave this here.
我写的《博物志》
It's a copy of my scroll - naturalis Historia.
老兄 谢谢
Thanks, mate.
在我改变主意之前 赶快滚蛋
Now, get out, before I change my mind.
-好吧 我正在跑 -跑快点
- All right, I'm running. - Run faster.
糟糕历史（2009）
Horrible Histories
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