神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S06E09

Part 3 April 4, 2020, 8:19 p.m.

I want to say that this was
我人生中做过最艰难的决定之一
one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make.
这房♥间里人才济济
There is so much talent in this room.
快告诉我们小婊砸
Just tell us, bitch.
你就装作已经得到了角色就行
Act as if you already have the role.
选择你们之间任何一个
I could have cast any one of you
都能演一场大戏
and put on a great show,
但是我要做出抉择
but I had to make a call.
够了 Boyle 我们都是成年人了
Enough, Boyle. We're all adults.
没人会在乎这些了
No one cares about this that much.
- 我选择Holt警监 - Holt警监
- It's Captain Holt. - Captain Holt?
他是最差的
He was the worst one!
没有冒犯的意思但Holt太没说服力了
No offense, but Holt was so unconvincing.
他一直把他的童年形容成
He kept referring to his childhood
一个浑身碳灰的街头顽童
as a soot-covered street urchin.
是的我给了自己一个狄更斯式的背景设定
Yes, I gave myself a Dickensian backstory,
显然效果非常好
which apparently made quite the impression.
抱歉警长
I'm sorry, Sarge.
老实说我不是合适你的导演
Honestly, I don't think I'm the right director
我没法实现你那个版本的Maxwell Blaze
to bring your vision of Maxwell Blaze to life.
那到底是什么意思
What does that even mean?
意思就是你失败了
It means you blew it.
放弃挣扎吧 Jeffords 放弃吧
Walk away, Jeffords. Walk away.
布鲁克林
拘留所
亚特兰大大道275号♥
好了这将会是我被放在壁炉架上的照片
Okay, this is gonna be my mantel shot.
这样每次爸爸妈妈看到它
So every time Mom and Dad look at it,
就会想起David的所作所为
they'll be reminded of what David did.
我本想说你该冷静一点
I would say you should chill out,
但这让我为我的家庭感到骄傲
but this is actually making me feel great about my family
我们开始吧
so let's dive in.
一起说"持有毒品并有销♥售♥意图"
Everybody say "Possession with intent to distribute"!
嘿
Hey.
- 噢 - 啊 David 你来了
- Oh! - Ah, David, hi there.
刚刚的事跟你最近因"持有毒品并有销♥售♥意图"
That was unrelated to your recent arrest
而被捕的情况一点关系都没有
for possession with intent to distribute.
- 你还好吗 - 不太好
- How are you? - Not great.
是啊监狱生活艰难
Yeah, jail is rough.
你得在众目睽睽之下拉屎
You got to go poop in front of everyone.
我还记得我坐牢的时候
I remember when I was in prison,
我憋了几周最后终于忍♥不住的时候
I held it for weeks, and when I finally did go,
实在是
it was...
你知道吗 Jake 这件事和你没什么关系
You know what, Jake? This isn't about you.
那么 David 你是被炒了
So, David, did you get fired,
还是说会有比如说听讯会
or is there gonna be, like, a hearing?
她这么问是为了到时候去现场支持你
She's asking so she can be there to support you.
噢是的我绝对不会错过的
Oh, yeah, I wouldn't miss it.
- 我好激动 - 为了支持你
- I'm so excited. - To support you.
那正是我所说的
That's what I said.
- 我真的很期待能到那里去 - 支持你
- I'm really looking forward to being there. - To support you.
是的我们说的一样
Yeah, we're saying the same thing.
- 我简直兴奋坏了 - 好了宝贝
- I am pumped this is happening. - All right, babe,
或许你的哥哥并不想多谈事情的经过
maybe your brother doesn't want to talk about what happened.
- 我们还是走吧 - 没关系
- Let's just go. - It's okay.
我欠你们一个解释
I owe you guys an explanation.
我其实从青少年时期就开始嗑药了
I actually started doing drugs when I was a teenager.
你还记得爸爸妈妈给我们那么多的压力吗
You know how Mom and Dad put so much pressure on us?
最后我有点崩溃了
Eventually I just kind of cracked.
等等你感到压力
Wait, you felt pressure?
你看上去总是毫不费劲地得到一切
You always seemed to effortlessly thrive at everything.
我超嫉妒的
I was so jealous.
但是得知你也感到压力
But knowing that you also felt the pressure...
好了我们可以不用继续演戏了
All right, we can drop the act.
刚刚可能有人在监听我们
I just didn't know who was listening.
演什么戏
What act, now?
刚刚我说的一切都只是胡扯
Everything I've said before just now is a lie.
我被陷害了
I'm being framed.
我一直在调查那些
I've been investigating these dirty cops
被巴西黑♥手♥党♥收买♥♥的黑警
who are being paid off by the Brazilian mob.
噢巴西黑♥手♥党♥都太好看了
Oh, Brazilian mobsters are so good-looking.
宛如成群的吉赛尔都是美男美女
They're just a bunch of Giseles, the women and the men.
没错太疯狂了他们都美艳动人
Yes, it's insane. They're all gorgeous.
话说回来我想我打探得太深了
Anyway, I think I got too close.
那些黑警肯定是把毒品放到了我的桌子里
Those dirty cops must have planted the drugs in my desk.
所以你的意思是你并没有对可♥卡♥因♥上瘾
So what you're saying is, you're not addicted to cocaine?
Amy 这可是我啊我连咖啡都不喝的
Amy, it's me. I don't even drink coffee.
我太敬重自己的身体了
I have too much respect for my body.
这是水
This is water.
那你也不觉得爸妈给你压力
And you didn't feel pressure from Mom and Dad?
不他们那么支持我
No, they're so supportive.
我倒真的希望听到一些建设性批评
I'd actually love some constructive criticism.
只有这样才能成长
It's the only way to grow.
不管怎么说非常感谢你们把我保释出来
Anyway, thank you so much for bailing me out.
等你们把我送到家我就去洗清名誉
If you can just drop me off at home, I will clear my name,
然后事情就会回到从前那样了
and things can go back to the way they were.
从前那样妙啊
The way they were. Great.
那可是我最喜欢的状态
It's my favorite way of things being.
好了 Alfonso 希望你喜欢待在这儿
Okay, Alfonso, I hope you like it here in holding.
你要等上一段时间
It's gonna be a while.
所以
So...
- 你是怎么进来的 - 毒品
- what they got you in here for? - Drugs.
他们想让我招供但我可不是告密的人
They want me to flip, but I'm no snitch.
禁止喧哗或使用粗暴语言
我宁愿蹲牢
I'd rather do the time.
你呢
How about you?
我推了一把别人就为了看他皱皱眉头
I pushed a man, just to see him frown.
他真是糟透了
He is terrible.
是啊这看上去仿佛选一个机器人似的老书呆子
Yeah, it's almost like casting a robotic old nerd
是个天大的错误
was a huge mistake.
这是个错误吗警长
Was it a mistake, Sarge?
还是说这是智慧的一击
Or was it a stroke of brilliance?
- 你在说什么 - 听着你是个好演员
- What are you talking about? - Look, you're a good actor.
甚至可以说是个绝佳的演员但你太温和了
You could even be a great one. But you're too gentle.
生活还没有打得你满地找牙
Life hasn't kicked you around enough.
我出身贫寒
I mean, I grew up poor,
还有个情感虐待的爸爸
and my father was emotionally abusive.
这还不够
It's not enough.
你需要被我拒绝
You needed to be rejected by me,
毕竟你那么崇拜我
a man you admire so much.
啥所以这一切只是为了让我生气
What? So all this was just to make me mad?
我需要你感到愤怒和憎恶
I need you to feel the anger and resentment
就像Tyrone McCallister每天都在经历的那样
that Tyrone McCallister feels every single day of his life.
Tyrone McCallister是谁
Who's Tyrone McCallister?
是你
You are.
这就是我一直以来为你定制的角色
That's the part I wrote for you all along.
这太蠢了 Boyle
This is so stupid, Boyle.
你不能就这么操纵别人
You can't manipulate somebody like this
还指望着他们赞成你的想法
and then expect them to get on board.
对吧警长
Right, Sarge?
警长
Sarge?
我的名字是Tyrone
My name's Tyrone.
Tyrone McGallagher
Tyrone McGallagher.
- 是McCallister - McCallister
- McCallister. - McCallister.
所以我查了David的案宗
So I checked up on David's case file.
他通过了毒品检测
He passed his drug test.
显然这是他们见过最干净的血液
Apparently he has the cleanest blood they've ever seen.
我就知道这一切美好得太不真实了
I knew this was all too good to be true.
现在David要去洗清名誉
Now David's gonna clear his name
单打独斗地搞定毒贩和黑警
and singlehandedly take down drug dealers and dirty cops
然后从州长手里再领一个奖章
and get another medal from the governor.
听起来挺危险的
It sounds pretty dangerous.
也许我们该帮帮他