神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S06E05

Part 2 April 4, 2020, 8:18 p.m.

Why are there firefighters here?
他们中是否有人被查出来是纵火犯
Did one of them turn out to be an arsonist
- 并且烧毁了他们自己的酒吧 - 确实如此
- and burn down their own bar? - Actually, yes.
意料之中的事不过你们为什么打电♥话♥找我
So predictable. But why did you call me?
对此我也无能为力
There's nothing I can do about this.
你有威严人人都听你的
You have gravitas. Everyone listens to you.
听着即使我能挽回Shaw的酒吧我并不确定我想这样做
Look, even if I could save Shaw's, I'm not sure I'd want to.
这地方肮脏简陋
This place is a hovel.
只提供一种来自特拉华水峡的酒
The only wine they serve is from the Delaware Water Gap.
叫做"霞不丽"
It's called "Charbonnay."
霞多丽酒是著名红酒酒种 "霞不丽"是山寨酒名
但这里是我们的酒吧它一直都是
But this is our bar, and it has been forever.
改变是一件好事
Change is a good thing.
就在昨天你还大骂
Just yesterday, you were ranting
交响乐团增加一名第二短笛乐手
about the Philharmonic adding a second piccolo.
这太多余了它会让声音变得混乱
It's too many. It'll muddle the sound.
我很抱歉提起了这件事
I'm sorry I brought it up.
听着我们可以找一家新的酒吧
Look, we can find a new bar
配得上我们的
that's not beneath us.
贝尔酒屋怎么样
What about Bel Vino?
他们有甄选的意大利红酒
They've got a great selection of Italian reds,
而且就算你在一个地方站得久了
and your feet don't stick to the floor
你的脚也不会粘到地面上
if you stand in one place too long.
好吧如果你不打算采取行动那就我来
Fine. If you're not gonna do anything, then I will.
Hank 你得赶走这些操水管的
Hank, you got to get rid of these hose humpers.
- 有他们没我们 - 听着朋友们我不想偏袒某一方
- It's them or us. - Look, guys, I don't want to take sides.
我只想赚钱
I just want to make money.
那就继续开成警♥察♥的酒吧我们喝酒可是跟疯了一样
Then keep it a cop bar. We drink like crazy.
没错因为我们每天都在经历悲剧兔崽子
Yeah, 'cause of all the tragedy we experience on a daily basis, son.
哦是吗我们也经历了很多悲剧
Oh, yeah? We experience plenty of tragedy too.
我们每年因为杆洞死一个人
We lose a man a year to the pole hole.
这样怎么样
How about this?
如果是看钱的话我们干脆大喝一场
If it's about money, let's just have a drink-off.
谁在打烊之前喝出最大的账单
Whoever racks up the biggest tab by closing time
谁就能继续用Shaw的酒吧
gets to keep Shaw's.
可以啊警残们
Okay, defectives.
- 我的兄弟们没问题 - 哦是吗
- My guys can handle that. - Oh, can they?
因为99分局要开始真正地炒热气氛了
Cause the Nine-Nine's about to bring the real heat.
准备好迎接逆流吧小婊♥子♥们
Get ready for the back draft, bitch.
Jake 你不开心吗你要去哪儿
Jake, are you upset? Where are you going?
你是不是觉得自己的歌♥声太尴尬了
Are you embarrassed about your singing?
- Doug Judy - 什么
- Doug Judy. - What?
嘿 Jake 兄弟那首歌♥真的太他妈感人了
Hey, Jake. Man, that song was moving AF.
我们必须得记下来
We got to lay that down.
*Doug Judy 在海滩上尽情快活*
*Doug Judy, he's smushing on the beach*
别想着和我对唱你这个混♥蛋♥
Don't try and duet with me, you bastard.
你耍了我快给我个拥抱
You tricked me. Now give me a hug.
我很高兴你还活着我永远也不会原谅你
I'm so happy you're alive. I'll never forgive you.
你是我最好的朋友
You're my best friend.
呼我一下子经历了太多情绪起伏
Whoo, I just went through a lot of emotions real fast,
不过我觉得我现在已经恢复正常了
but I think I'm back to normal now.
- 我们要不要吃午饭 - 我超级想吃牛肉奶酪三明治
- Should we get lunch? - I would love a cheesesteak.
我也正好在想这个也许是因为
I was thinking the exact same thing, probably 'cause...
那副棺材看起来就像潜水艇三明治
The coffin looks like a hoagie roll.
Judy 这到底是怎么回事
Judy, what the hell is going on?
呃你是谁还有Rosa在哪里
Uh, who are you, and where is Rosa?
我是他的老板我需要一个回答
I'm his boss, and I want answers.
行吧你们知道Stefano Lucas是谁吗
All right. You know who Stefano Lucas is?
那个军♥火♥商
The arms dealer?
我收到风声说他派人追杀我所以我必须得消失
I got word he put a hit out on me, so I had to disappear.
为什么Stefano Lucas会想把你除掉
Why does Stefano Lucas want you dead?
他最心爱的法拉利被偷了
His favorite Ferrari got stolen,
出于某些原因他觉得是我♥干♥的
and for some reason he thinks I did it.
也许是因为有人一直在布鲁克林区内偷车
Probably because someone's been jacking cars all over Brooklyn
还是用着你的惯用手法
using your MO.
我的天 Jake 你是在说我在想你要说的话吗
Oh, my God. Jake, are you saying what I think you're saying?
是的
Yes.
你有个模仿者
You have a copycat.
我都不知道我的职业生涯已经这么成功了
I didn't think I'd accomplished enough in my career for this.
我知道这意义重大
I know, it's big.
被人这么关注让人感觉很不错你懂吗
It just feels so good to be seen, you know?
等等抓到模仿者的唯一方式
Wait. The only way to catch a copycat
就是和原版罪犯一起组队抓人
is to team up with the original criminal.
我要重回战场了快给我把枪
I'm back on the force! Give me a gun.
不行才没有什么模仿者就是你做的
No! There is no copycat. You did it.
不是我♥干♥的我现在金盆洗手了
Not me. I'm living that straight life.
Terry拒绝相信那些他觉得人本性难改
Terry refuses to believe it. He thinks people can't change.
去和Bruce Banner的衬衫裤子来这一套吧
Tell that to Bruce Banner's pants and shirt.
我也是这么说的
That's what I said.
Doug Judy 你被逮捕了
Doug Judy, you're under arrest.
什么警长
What? Sarge?
你真的要把这场葬礼的气氛给搞僵了
You are really bringing down the vibe at this funeral.
这到底是咋回事儿
What the hell is that?
Jake给我弄了这么一套装扮
Jake got me this disguise
这样罪犯就不会发现我再去给Stefano通风报信了
so some criminal doesn't see me in here and tell Stefano.
好吧可是为什么Jake也戴着
Okay, but why is Jake also wearing them?
呃因为它看上去超级酷警长
Uh, because it looks super cool, Sarge.
我们看上去就像<黑客帝国>里面那对火♥辣♥的双胞胎
We look like the hot twins from "The Matrix."
我们要开始恶化了
We are getting aggravated.
你们看上去像米力瓦利合唱团
You look like Milli Vanilli.
喔我要当Vanilli
Ooh! I call Vanilli.
啊我想当Vanilli的被你抢了
Ah, I want to be Nilli, but you got it.
- 他是最棒的那个 - 你知道的
- He's the best one. - You know it's true.
所以你去查证Judy的不在场证明了吗
So did you check out Judy's alibi?
是的出奇的是竟然没有问题
Yes, and surprisingly, it checks out.
上周六
Last Saturday night,
Doug在Joshy Greenbaum的受诫礼上当DJ
Doug was deejaying Joshy Greenbaum's bar mitzvah.
很狂野的派对
That was a wild party.
Karen阿姨就是个怪胎
Auntie Karen is a freak.
Judy 你还会给受诫礼当DJ的吗
Judy, you deejay bar mitzvahs?
那是我最棒的一次演出
Best gig I ever had.
没有谁比13岁的犹太男孩更爱嘻哈乐的了
No one likes hip-hop more than a 13-year-old Jewish boy.
- 嗯哼太对了 - 我不信这一套
- Mm. So true. - I'm not buying it.
说不定在礼物桌上偷现金呢
Probably stealing cash off the gift table.
行了警长他有不在场证明的
Sarge, come on. He has an alibi.
我们赶快组队一起去抓那个模仿者吧
Let's just team up and try and catch the copycat.
一千个俯卧撑
A thousand push-ups.
是以前Rosa和我常说的话
It's something Rosa and I used to say.
意思就是相信我
It just means trust me.
如果Judy就是那个罪犯我就做一千个俯卧撑
If Judy's a criminal, I'll do a thousand push-ups,
既然你这么自信
and since you're so confident,
如果你错了那就你来做
if you're wrong, you can do 'em.
一千个俯卧撑对你来说很多吗
A thousand push-ups? That's a lot to you?
下地狱吧 Terry
You go to hell, Terry.
加到十万个俯卧撑我就加入
Make it 100,000 push-ups, and I'm in.
很明显我做不了那么多
Obviously I can't do that much exercise,
但也无所谓因为Doug Judy说的是实话
but it doesn't matter, because Doug Judy is telling the truth,
- 是吧Judy - 有我撑着呢宝贝
- Right, Judy? - I got you, baby.
行吧十万个俯卧撑
So fine. 100,000 push-ups.
你开心了吗警长
You happy, Sarge?
- 好的那么 Doug - 你从来没叫过我Doug
- Great. Now, Doug... - You never call me Doug.
那个嘛因为你之前叫了我Jake
Yeah, well, you called me Jake earlier.
我以为我们要开始互相称呼对方的名字了
I thought we were switching to first names.
我也正好在想这个
I was thinking the same exact thing!
我在想 "为什么不叫他Jake呢"
I was like, "Why not call him Jake?"
- 我们的关系更亲近了 - 因为他太严肃了
- We're bonding, man. - Cause he's so official.
但他现在又冷下来了
But it's chill now.
那么 Doug
So, Doug...
怎么了 Jake
Yes, Jake?
我们现在知道了那个模仿者在用你的手法
Now that we know the copycat is using your playbook,
假设你还在继续行窃其实并没有
if you were still in the game... which you're not,