神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S06E13

Part 1 April 4, 2020, 8:19 p.m.

我来了我来了
I'm here! I'm here, I'm here.
可以开始开会了
You can start the meeting now.
已经开完会了你迟到了
The meeting is over. You're late.
你错过了点名
You missed roll call
和操作新打印机的辅♥导♥课
and the tutorial on using the new copiers.
六年了不管我怎么努力
Six years, and no matter how hard I try,
我还是没能让你明白
I still can't get you to understand
守时的重要性
the importance of being punctual.
或许你就该放弃然后接受我本来的样子
Maybe you should just give up and accept me for who I am?
不我会击溃你的
No, I will break you.
- 就在此刻 - 噢
- Right now. - Oh.
你在外面磨磨蹭蹭的时候
While you were out being tardy,
我勤勤恳恳地研究出了一种特别的惩罚
I was hard at work devising a special punishment.
我为这个办公室里所有人除了你
I've crafted an intricate personal high five
都各自量身定做了一套复杂的击掌花样
with everyone in this office except you.
什么但你讨厌击掌啊
What? But you hate high fives.
没错每一分钟都生不如死
Yes, every minute of it was hell.
但对你来说只会更痛苦
But it'll be worse for you.
小队解散
Squad, dismissed.
再见 Diaz
Good-bye, Diaz.
从敬礼到摇屁屁吗
Salute into a fanny waggle?
- 慢走 Boyle - 噢耍蛇人
- Good-bye, Boyle. - Oh, the snake charmer!
回见 Jeffords
Good-bye, Jeffords.
- 那可是撞屁♥股♥ - 拜拜 Santiago
- That's a butt bump. - Good-bye, Santiago.
双重击掌加反弹爆♥炸♥
Double fist bump reverse explosion
再到彼得·汤森式的弹奏手法
into a Pete Townshend strum.
彼得·汤森英国摇滚乐手以狂热和戏剧化的表演著称
好吧这真是糟透了
All right, that was terrible,
但一切都过去了我挺过来了
but it's over now, and I made it through.
再见施乐公♥司♥的Leonard
Good-bye, Leonard from Xerox.
啥不行不可以
What? No, no, no.
打印工都有
The copy guy?
神烦警探
第六季第十三集
你来顺路拜访真是太好了 Kevin
So nice of you to stop by, Kevin.
过得开心我希望这是高效多产的一天
Enjoy your day. I hope it's productive.
谢谢你 Raymond
Thank you, Raymond.
我也希望你有高效多产的一天
I hope your day is productive as well.
在办公室公开亲热吗我的天
PDA in the office? My, my.
- 我克制不住了 - 嗯
- Couldn't help myself. - Hmm.
噢我能在用一下警局的卫浴设施吗
Oh, may I please use the precinct facilities
在我上班之前
before I head to work?
可以谢谢你申请得到许可
Yes. Thank you for asking for permission.
谢谢你批准
Thank you for granting it.
- 嘭 - 可算来了
- Whoomp. - There it is!
我得说你要是能
Got to say, I could have used
把这声"嘭"说得更有活力就好了
a little more oomph on the whoomp.
那是你能听到的最有活力的"嘭"了
That's the oomphiest whoomp you'll get.
所以发生了什么事你为什么想和我私下联♥系♥
So what's going on? Why'd you want to meet in private?
我有个案子需要你帮忙
I need your help with a case.
我们哥大的古典系里
Three antique coins were stolen
有三个古董硬币被偷走了
from my classics department at Columbia.
你怎么不找Holt警监帮忙
So why not ask Captain Holt for help on the case?
等等你们俩是要离婚了吗
Wait, are you guys getting a divorce?
我接受得了
I can handle it.
这并没有触发我什么诡异的情结
This doesn't bring up any weird issues for me.
不完全不是那样的
No, it's nothing like that.
Raymond是个出色的侦探
Raymond's a brilliant detective.
只不过每当案子和我有关
It's just when a case involves me,
他就会变得有点过于情绪化
he can get a little overemotional.
你还记得安全屋那时候
You remember the safe house.
噢没错他简直疯了
Oh, yeah, he went crazy.
但我也记得我们俩那时成了最好的朋友
But I also remember you and me becoming best friends
还看完了尼古拉斯·凯奇拍过的所有电影
and watching every Nic Cage movie ever made.
你现在还能随意引用吗
Can you still quote them all?
不了我让自己从那些废话中净化出来了
No, I purged myself of that nonsense.
- 我赌它还在你心里 - 没有了
- Oh, I bet it's still in there. - It's not.
- 咱们走着瞧 - 咱们不会
- We'll see. - We won't.
- 还是有点可能性的 - 可能性为零
- There's a chance it's in there. - Chance of zero.
我愿意拿钱赌它还在
I'd put money that maybe it's there.
- 你要输钱了 - 好吧
- You're losing your money. - Okay.
- 所以你会帮我吗 - 我不知道
- So will you help me? - I don't know.
我想帮但是瞒着Holt
I want to, but keeping a secret from Holt?
- 这可是不小的压力 - 嗯
- That's a lot of pressure. - Hmm.
我记得没错的话
Am I remembering correctly?
你难道不是把压力当早饭吃吗
Don't you... eat pressure for breakfast?
凯奇在<勇闯夺命岛>里的台词
Nic Cage in "The Rock."
我们是最好的朋友我帮定了
We are best friends. I am so in!
哦不 Raymond来了
Oh, no, that's Raymond.
那是他打开门的声音
That's how he opens a door.
Kevin 你还在吗
Kevin, are you still in here?
呃在 Raymond 我在隔间里
Uh, yes, Raymond, I'm in the stall.
刚刚放出了一些
Some tickets were just released
这周末马♥勒♥第四交响曲的票
for Mahler's Fourth Symphony this weekend.
好啊听起来好极了咱们去吧
Great. That sounds great. Let's do it.
太好了那你倾向于坐哪儿
Fantastic. Now, which section do you prefer?
有一层
The first tier,
二层还有三层
the second tier, the third tier...
一层吧
The first tier.
好的那一层的什么区域
Now, which section of the first tier?
左边右边正中间中间偏
Right, left, right center, center...
坐哪儿都行
Just any section is fine.
哪儿都行哇哦
Any section, wow.
看了有人早上吃煎蛋时加了胡椒啊
Someone had pepper on their eggs this morning.
那我买♥♥票了
I'll buy the tickets.
坐哪儿都行
Any section.
各位惨绝人寰的消息
Guys, horrible news.
今天早上冰箱坏了所有东西都是温热的
The fridge broke this morning. Everything's warm.
感觉不是什么大事啊
Doesn't seem like that big a deal.
- 你的酸奶都变质了 - 是谁干的
- Your yogurt's spoiled. - Who did this?
好了大家都冷静一点
Okay, everyone calm down.
我会申请换个新冰箱的
I will put a request in for a new fridge.
祝你足够顺利能被批准
Good luck getting that approved.
Kelly局长已经大幅削减了我们的预算
Commissioner Kelly's already slashed our budget
就留了一点点活路
within an inch of its life.
是啊厕纸现在都只有一层了
Yeah, the toilet paper's only one ply now.
- 我的屁♥股♥总是很疼 - 空调坏了
- My butt hurts all the time. - The AC is broken.
我的屁♥股♥总是很疼
My butt hurts all the time.
Scully的屁♥股♥总是很疼
Scully's butt hurts all the time.
好了各位我们明白了
All right, guys, we get it.
只不过午餐是一天之中唯一一个
It's just that lunch is the one part of the day
没有被Kelly局长毁了的部分
Commissioner Kelly hadn't ruined.
人们气坏了士气真的锐减
People are pissed. Morale's really taken a hit.
好我来处理这事
Okay, I got this.
嘿队员们今天午餐我请了
Hey, squad. Lunch is on me today.
大家一起出去吃披萨
Taking everyone out for pizza.
这就是鼓舞士气的方式
And that's how you improve morale.
行你可不是这里唯一的警长
Okay. You're not the only sergeant around here.
让我帮帮忙
Let me help.
屋子这半边的人午餐我请客
This side of the room, lunch is on me,
我们要去吃比披萨更好的东西
and we're getting something better than pizza.
寿司
Sushi!
你在试图把我比下去吗
Are you trying to outdo me?
不不不
No, no, no.
我只是想鼓舞士气
Just trying to raise morale.
酷酷酷酷
Cool. Cool, cool, cool.
士气士气士气没问题
Morale, morale, morale. Okay.
哇所以这就是你上课的教室
Wow, so this is your classroom.
今天的课讲的什么
What's today's lecture about?
我知道你一点也不关心这个
I know you don't care about that.
你就问我你想问的问题吧
Just ask me what you want to ask me.
我能玩你的激光笔吗