神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S06E01

Part 2 April 4, 2020, 8:17 p.m.

- 不是真的吧 - 用不着是真的
- That's not true. - It doesn't have to be.
只是个人评论罢了
It's commentary.
有人可不觉得这算运气好
Well, you know who didn't think it was a good run?
就是我爸 Lynn Boyle
My daddy, Lynn Boyle.
他难过得不行
He's inconsolable.
我觉得他会放下的
Well, I'm sure he'll get over it.
不 Boyle家族永不放下
No, Boyles don't "Get over it."
我们都永不遗忘
It becomes part of us.
我们的回忆都刻骨铭心蚀骨销魂
It lives within us. It eats us out.
我们必须让他俩重归于好
We have to get them back together.
- 我不干 - 反正我要做
- Pass. - Well, I'm doing it with
- 有你没你都一样 - 那就别带我了
- or without your help. - Okay, without.
好吧我在逞强求你了我需要你的帮助
Okay, you called my bluff. It has to be with your help.
你必须得答应
And I'm not taking no for an answer.
- 不行 - 你看你又来了
- No. - Okay, you did it again.
你为什么总这样做
Why are you like this?
我也不知道
I don't know.
警长我遇到点麻烦本来想找Holt警监的
Hey, Sarge, I have a problem, and I would ask Holt,
- 但既然他不在 - 你来求助于狗王Terry
- but since he's not back... - You came to Top Dog Terry.
明智的选择
Smart move.
我一整天都在排忧解难
I've been solving problems all day long.
好吧那你知道我正在办的冰♥毒♥案吧
Okay, so you know that meth case I've been working on
我已经追了两个月了
for the last two months?
卫生署的警员想要从我这把案子抢走
The Department of Sanitation police want to poach it
因为毒品是在垃圾堆里翻出来的
from me, because the drugs were found in a dumpster.
所以他们就说这案子跟垃圾相关
They're saying it's garbage-related.
很简单
This is an easy one.
叫他们滚蛋
Tell them to screw off.
这不就解决了
See? Problem solved.
我已经做过了然后他们威胁我
Yeah, well, I did that, and they threatened to make
说要向市长提交书面投诉
a formal complaint to the mayor.
那就让他们接手吧
Then just let them have the case.
问题解决了
Problem solved.
Terry 这案子我已经办了有两个月了
Terry, I've been working on it for two months,
那些傻♥逼♥会把它搞砸的
and those dummies are gonna blow it.
也对或许你可以跟卫生署合作呢
Right. Well, you could partner up with sanitation.
解决了咩汪汪
Problem solved? Woof-woof?
也不行总部不同意说是预算原因
Nope. Headquarters won't allow it due to budgetary reasons.
没事没事没事
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
之前Holt警监好像写过一份工作指南
You know, Captain Holt was writing an instruction manual
以防万一他当选局长之后离开这里
for his replacement in case he was named commissioner.
说不定会告诉你该怎么做
Maybe he could tell you what to do.
没有这个必要
That's not necessary.
狗王Terry可以独♥立♥做决定
Top Dog Terry can make a decision.
那决定是什么呢
And what would that be?
狗王Terry需要独自考虑一下吗
Does Top Dog Terry want a moment to think about it?
好的汪
Woof-woof.
自从竞选失败以来我一直被一种悲哀的心情所裹挟
Since the rejection, a great sadness has enveloped me.
我一直希望心中的阴霾能散去
I kept expecting this dark feeling to pass,
可它却愈发浓烈
but it's only gotten worse.
得不到心仪的工作最恶心了
Not getting the job you want stinks.
一年级的时候我没当上领读员
In first grade, I was passed over for line leader,
现在还气得不行
and I'm still pissed.
Kyle D朗读的时候动不动就起伏声调还乱停顿配上呼声
Kyle D.'s lines had curves and gaps and cutting galore.
要不要这么花哨
It was a frickin' carnival.
一点没错领读员是啥
Yeah. What's a line leader?
重点不仅仅在于我没得到这份工作
Well, it's not just that I didn't get the job.
而是它落到了John Kelly手里
It's that John Kelly did.
他已经发布了一份备忘录
He's already released a memo
详述了他的"警戒型治安"方案
detailing his "Vigilant policing" Initiative.
本质就是回到拦截和搜查式的执法时代
It's essentially a return to stop and frisk.
选择他简直违背了我的一切原则
Choosing him is a betrayal of everything I stand for.
我也一直这样想Kyle D的事情
I feel the same way about Kyle D.
我试过忍♥气吞声回去工作
I tried to suck it up and go back to work.
我甚至换上了制♥服♥ 准备开车上班
I put on my uniform and got in my car.
等我回过神来我就已经在飞往墨西哥的飞机上了
And next thing I knew, I was on a plane to Mexico.
我什么行李都没带
I didn't even pack a bag.
我在附近的礼品店买♥♥了些文化衫
I bought a bundle of novelty shirts at a nearby gift shop.
这件上面写了 "干啥呢沙滩"
This one says, "What's up, beaches?"
用"沙滩"代替了"婊♥子♥"以达到幽默的效果
Instead of "Bitches" For humor reasons.
- 你不是不喜欢幽默吗 - 反正我现在就是个笑话了
- But you hate humor. - Well, I'm a joke now,
所以这件衣服很衬我
so it suits me.
行吧但你到底为啥会来墨西哥
Mm-kay. But, how did you end up here in Mexico
还跟我们跑到了同一家小度假村里
at the exact same tiny resort as us?
Gina念叨这里已经好几年了
Gina's been talking up this place up for years.
优♥惠♥码GINA30
Referral Code GINA30.
我完全没猜到你们会来
I had no idea you'd be here.
没关系的长官
You know what? It's fine, sir.
很多人度蜜月的时候都会带上司一起的
A lot of people go on their honeymoon with their boss.
不行我本来以为大声说出来
Nope, I thought if I said it out loud
听着就没那么怪了但其实并不管用
it would normalize it, but it's weird.
会没事的
It's gonna be okay.
你打算在这里待多久长官
How long are you staying, sir?
等我稍微回过劲来就回去
Just until I get my head right.
但别担心我不会做你们的电灯泡的
But don't worry. I'll steer clear of you two.
对你们来说我根本不存在
You won't even know I'm here.
这里真的很浪漫
This place is so romantic.
是啊简直是亲密无间
Yeah, and so... intimate.
别担心我并没听你们在说什么
Don't worry. I'm not listening to you.
我只是在想我点的这份鲈鱼都冷成什么了
I'm just thinking about how this sea bass is cold
但却仍不及那命运的黑手半分冰冷残酷
but not as cold and cruel as the hands of fate
将我的人生推下了无尽的黑暗深渊
that have thrust my entire life into darkness.
真该死
Ah, damn it.
我刚好点了鲈鱼
I just ordered the sea bass.
太棒了宝贝儿
Ahh, babe, this is so nice.
我们的屁屁上无缘无故摆了一排热石头
There are hot stones on our butts for no reason.
我屁屁上就没有
Not on mine.
我屁♥股♥上的石头一直掉
My butt stones keep falling off,
因为我肌肉崩得太紧了
because I'm so tense about
我一直在担心Holt闯进来把一切都搅黄了
Holt being here and ruining everything.
- 其实也没那么糟吧 - 真的吗
- It hasn't been that bad. - Really?
啊抱歉
Oops. Sorry.
我连漂都漂不对
Can't even float right.
把我推开就行
Just push me away.
反正所有人都在推开我
Everyone else does.
是不太好但只要我们待在这儿应该就是安全的
It's not great, but as long as we stay in here, we're safe.
Peralta Santiago 我在你们房♥间里
Peralta, Santiago I'm in your room.
啥你怎么进来的
What? How?
阳台门开着我就从栅栏钻过来了
Patio door was open I pushed through the hedge.
告诉我我身上哪里流露着废物气息
Tell me, what is it about me that screams loser?
问题是老大我们两个正趴在这
Yeah, you know, we're kind of in the middle
接受按♥摩♥到一半呢
of gettin' massages right now, sir.
我考虑太不周到了
Oh, how thoughtless of me.
我躺下这样你们就能看到我的脸了
I'll get down here so you can see my face.
没事不用了
Oh, no, that's...
我再来问一遍我身上哪里流露着废物气息
Hello. The question was, what is it about me that screams loser?
DTF T恤上改写为: Down to Fiesta(乐享狂欢) 原意: Down to Fuck(乐意开操)
我还是想不明白咱们爸妈之间发生了什么
I can't figure out what went wrong between our parents.
他们感情那么深
They were so in love.
怎么我们现在还要讲话了吗
Oh, okay, so we're having a conversation?
为了让他们重归于好
No, to get them back together,
我们必须弄清楚发生了什么你妈妈跟你说过吗
we need to know what happened. Did your mom tell you?
- 没有 - 真该死
- Nope. - Damn it.
让我们头脑风暴一下
Okay, let's brainstorm.
可能是我爸爸太粘人或者太大男子主义了
It could be that my dad is too clingy or too masculine.
我要先玩个手♥机♥小游戏了
You know what? I'm going to play a game on my phone
你先自己风暴着吧
while you go on this little journey.
他总是过度分享优柔寡断
He overshares, he's indecisive,
还爱哭鼻子
he's always crying.
哦我成功进到寺庙里了
Oh, I made it inside the temple.
他还特别爱穿和服