工作狂（2011）
Workaholics S04E05
Part 4
June 29, 2021, 8:46 a.m.
啊噢 这不是真枪 后面有出口吗
Uh-oh. Not a real gun. Do you have an exit in the back?
美味
热狗
兄弟们 对于刚才发生的事 我很抱歉
Hey, guys. I'm sorry about that back there.
我想了很多
I've been thinking about it a lot,
我也想要为这部电影的后半部分出些力
and I would like to be part of this half of the film as well.
我在网上研究了一下
I did some research online,
我想要用实物来给你们演示一下
and I kind of want to show you
手术是怎样进行的
how the surgery's gonna go through a visual demonstration
主要是给你们这俩要参与纪录片的人看
that I'm gonna show the both of you for the documentary.
好的 - 好的
Cool. - All right. Okay.
Adam入伙了
Adam's on board.
好 - 太棒了 兄弟
All right! - This is great, man.
我现在是你们的一员了
I'm part of the team now.
我要把这段录下来 -好的
I'm gonna roll on this. - Okay.
这是你 这是你的大鸡鸡
This is you right here, and I gave you a big ol'penis.
一根大鸡鸡
I gave you a big one,
接下来是你希望发生的情况
and here's what you're gonna want to hope happens.
快速的一刀
One quick snip,
鸡鸡就剪下来了
and your penis is off,
然后 把它移植到Blake身上
and then... and then you put it on Blake,
但这不是大多数时候的情况
but that's not usually what happens.
大多数情况会发生的 很有可能
What's going to happen, more than likely,
因为我做了研究 医生醉醺醺的
'cause I've done my research... The doctor's drunk, right?
走进来 他说
He comes in. He's just like,
"让我来剪"
"Let me get a little..."
"噢天哪" 医生不小心手滑
"Oh, gosh. Oh!" And he's slipping,
麻醉也还没有完全起效
and the anesthesia hasn't kicked in fully.
噢 天 - 所以你能感觉得到
Oh, my... - So you're feeling it all,
他说 "噢 不 发生了什么"
and he's like, "Oh, no! What's happening?"
而你的脑海里充满了 "噢 上帝啊"
And inside your brain's just going, "Oh, God!
"他在剪我的鸡鸡"
"He's cutting my penis!
"噢 他只剪了一部分 噢 这太"
"Oh! He slit the side of it! Oh, it's all n..."
然后医生也被吓坏了
Now the doctor's freaking out, right?
医生很害怕 "我得把证据藏起来"
The doctor's freaking out. "I got to hide the evidence!"
不 不 - 不会的
Oh, no. No. - No, it's not gonna get...
你 他 不要听他的
You... he's... don't listen to him.
你的鸡鸡会被吃掉 - 嘿
Your dick gonna get chewed. - Hey!
嘿 你不要听这个坚定派的鼓吹
Hey! Don't you dare listen to this bro-life propaganda.
我不知道 那情况也是可能发生的 我做过研究
I don't know, that could happen. I did my research.
这尼玛不是废话吗
It's poppycock is what it is.
我不确定 我真的不确定了
I don't even know. I don't know anymore.
我都不确定自己是不是割鸡派了 哥们
I mean, I-I don't even know if I'm bro-choice, dude.
你不能现在退出 兄弟
You can't back out now, man! All right?
我为了新鸡鸡已经做了很多计划
I've already made so many plans with the new penis, all right?
我已经在西尔斯预约好了
I've already got an appointment over at sears.
我找了好些可口诱人的裸女
I'm gonna take some very, very tasteful nudes,
我不想毁掉这一切
and I don't want to jinx it,
但她们也许会是我们的圣诞卡片封面
but they might be our Christmas card.
你自己选吧
You got a choice to make.
你要鸡鸡还是要朋友
You either keep your dick, or you keep your friend.
当然选鸡鸡 - 我不知道
You pick your dick. - I don't know.
这让我怎么选啊
How am I supposed to decide that?
仔细想想吧
Think about it!
你选 什么 - 选鸡鸡
You make... what? - Keep your dick.
这是100块 Karl
Karl, here's $100
我从预算里拿的 你答应继续拍就给你了
from our budget, if you do it.
那必须的 - 拜托了
Oh, hell, yeah. - Thank you.
太棒了 有100刀
That's great. $100.
你这辈子见过这么多钱吗
Have you ever seen this amount of money in your life?
兄弟 祝你好运
Best of luck in there, pal.
谢谢 Ders 太感谢了
Thank you, Ders. Thank you.
不 我应该感谢你 Karl
No. Thank you, Karl.
我等不及接管你的小♥弟♥弟♥了
I can't wait to have... Your dick.
你会喜欢的
You're gonna love it.
你让我重生了
First day of the rest of my life.
好吧 你知道我不管怎样
Okay. So you know that I don't
都不赞成的 对吧 - 恩
support this in any way, right? - Yeah.
但是我真心希望你能活着出来 兄弟
But I really hope you don't die in there, man.
谢谢 Adam
Thank you, Adam.
我想再硬一次 最后一次
I'd like to get hard for one last time.
好的 - 有道理
Yeah. - Makes sense.
好了 伙计们
All right, boys.
我们给他留点个人空间
Let's give him a little space here.
<家居装饰>里面的辣妈
Mom from Home Improvement.
<家居装饰>里面的辣妈
Mother from Home Improvement.
老天爷 她太辣了
Oh, she's so freakin' hot.
噢
Oh.
哇哦 我的天呀
Wow. Holy moly.
Jill Taylor 想想她你就软下来了
Jill Taylor. She'll chub you.
哈喽 病号♥们 Karl 手术准备就绪啦
Hidy ho, patients! Karl, you're fully prepped.
我们把你送进手术室吧
Let's get you into surgery.
好的
Okay.
行尸走屌♥
Dead dick walking!
你现在后悔也可以 - 它很快就是你的了
You can back out now! - It's gonna be yours.
我马上回来 - 好的
I'll be right back. - Okay.
*我*
*I've*
*一直在寻找真爱*
*Been looking for love*
噢 我天哪
Oh, my God!
真不敢相信这是真的
I can't believe this is happening.
这才是生活啊 噢 你在这我太高兴了
This is real life right now. Oh, I'm so glad you're here.
Johnson医生去哪 我就去哪
I go everywhere Dr. Johnson goes.
啊 那我们一起去我的Johnson医生那里吧
Ah, well, how about we go where my Dr. Johnson is?
就在我的平角短裤里
In my boxer briefs...
不过我现在没穿哦
Except for I'm not wearing any right now,
因为洗衣液都用完了
'cause I'm out of detergent,
所以我连衣服都不洗了
so I didn't even do any laundry.
天啊 我一见到你
God, as soon as I met you,
就知道我们要互相吸小♥弟♥弟♥了
I knew we were gonna be sucking each other's.
绝对的
Totally.
噢 不 等等
Oh, wait. Oh, hold on.
等等 互相吸什么
Wait. Sucking each other's...
我 我是Johnson医生的病人
I-I'm one of Dr. Johnson's patients
也是助理
as well as his assistant.
我是变性人 女性变男性
I'm female to male transgender,
我的胸还没移除
so I haven't gotten my boobs removed yet,
但是下面嘛 可是新屌♥城
but downstairs, it's New Dick City.
耶 新屌♥ 新屌♥城
Yeah! New Dick... New Dick City?
对 - 对 新杰克城(纽约黑街)
Yeah. - Yeah. New Jack City.
我喜欢那部电影 但我不知道
I love that movie, but I don't know
我是不是应该看新屌♥城
if I would see new dick city as a film.
我不知道这合不合我的兴趣
I don't know if that's up my alley 'cause, you know,
我不喜欢 我不喜欢男人的
I'm not into... I'm not into dudes.
噢 看见你那样吃热狗 我就以为
Oh, I... the way you were eating those hot dogs, I just...
那样吃热狗确实很基
It was a homosexual way to eat hot dogs.
我当时没意识到
Yeah. I didn't know that.
我以为那就是 - 哇哦
I just thought it was, like... - Wow.
就是想多摄入蛋白质
Just trying to protein-load.
我真的以为你喜欢我
I-I really thought you were into me.
我确实喜欢你 就像兄弟那样
I'm into you. Like, as a... as a bro.
我们是哥们 我们是朋友
We are bros. We are friends.
那好吧 - 既然你要切除这对儿小宝贝了
Okay. - Since these are going away,
能让我这个哥们抓一把吗
you mind if I just get a... Just a bro... bro squeeze?
哥们 来吧
Bro, go for it, bro.
作为男人 - 恩哼
As a dude. - Mm-hmm.
哥们间的事 - 绝对
As a bro thing. - Totally.
这就是兄弟间的事 哇哦 - 是啊
It's a bro thing. Wow! - Yeah.
比我想象的软啊
Those are squishier than I remember.
对啊 很软的 - 是呢
Yeah. They're squishy. - Yeah.
我好长时间没这样抖过了
It's been a while since I've jiggled one.
哥们 看这个
Dude, check this out.
工作狂（2011）
Workaholics
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