工作狂（2011）
Workaholics S04E03
Part 2
June 29, 2021, 8:46 a.m.
是的 - 而她就会
Yeah -She'll be...
她就像Elmo 而我们则是
She'll be like Elmo, and we'll be that
传说中把手放她屁♥股♥上的黑衣变♥态♥男
allegedly black pervert dude with our hand up her butt.
没错 - 我们这就解散吧
Yeah. - I'm gonna unhuddle now.
伙计们 为了我们方才提起的选举
Guys, so for the election that I was talking about,
我们推举Jillian
We elect Jillian.
哇喔 等等 什么
Whoo! Wait. What?
不 不不不 很抱歉
No. No, no, no, no. I'm sorry.
无论何时我只要被赋予责任
Whenever I'm given responsibility,
我就会狂暴化 而我还没疯呢
I turn into a crazy person, and I am not crazy.
你这不是已经疯了吗
You are, though, right?
嘿 我们就是你的竞选小组
Hey, we are your campaign team, okay?
Blake会成为你的形象顾问 好吧
Uh, Blake will be your image consultant, all right?
还有 呃 Adam 则是政♥治♥顾问
And, uh, Adam... Political advisor.
多指教啊 好邻居
Hi-de-ho, good neighbor.
而我则是竞选经理 毫无疑问
And I'll be campaign manager, of course, okay?
为啥你就是竞选经理啊
Why do you get to be campaign manager, huh?
那听起来可不像团队合作啊 Ders
That doesn't sound like teamwork, Ders.
我担任的可是领导者(leadership)的角色
I'm taking a leadership role, okay?
没有Ders这四个字母就拼不出它
You can't spell it without "Ders".
没有Ders就拼不出"它(it)"这个词吗
You can't spell "It" without "Ders"?
你不能 - I T 我这不就拼出来了
You can't... - I-T. I just did.
我就是这么机智无双
I guess I'm a freakin' genius.
Anders 你居然知道怎么拼写"它"
Anders, do you now know how to spell "It"?
当然啦 难不能你有"它"那么傻吗
Yeah, are you an it-iot?
像"它"那么傻 - 你们这帮家伙
It-iot. - You guys...
I-t-o-t
I-t-o-t.
我说的词是"领导者"
Leadership!
爱咋样就咋样 伙计 我会当政♥治♥顾问的
Okay, whatever, man. Fine. I'll be the political advisor.
我会给出帮你做宣传的建议
I'll 'vise the shib out of your ads.
那的确是我想做的事
That's something I'm willing to do.
但作为回报 大家也得为我做点事
But in return, we need to do something for me
凭借我的力量和肌肉
Using my strength and my muscles.
我应该成为头号♥安保特遣队
I shall be head security detail.
我同意 那让我觉得更有安全感了
I would love that. I'd feel a lot safer with that.
帅炸了 关于保护人类我可知道不少呢
Cool, 'cause I know a lot more about protecting people!
哇哦 - 哇哦 Waymond
Whoa! - Whoa, Waymond.
安保系统上线 如果你有任何疑难
Running security. So, if you have any issues...
你看起来挺不错的 拍拍灰就成
You're looking good. Dust it off.
他抖成筛子了
He's shook.
好了 别叨逼叨的 行吗
Well, don't be a bitch about it, you know?
男孩们精神抖擞
Boys are fresh
政♥治♥家追求的都是形象对吧
Okay, politics are all about image, right?
这就是我们把你
That's why we got you looking
打扮成<谁搞了佩林>里那个艳星的原因
like the porn star from "Nailin' Palin."
你很美 - 给 拿它当作杀手锏
You look great. - Here, final touch...
把这些鸡排放进你的胸罩里
Put these chicken cutlets in your boob cups.
去吧 - 这样好吗
Go ahead. - You think this is a good idea?
当然啦 开什么玩笑
Oh, yeah, you kidding me?
女人胸大走四方
Big titties... they command respect.
你起码得有Kat Dennings那么大的胸
Yeah, you got to have at least those Kat Dennings upstairs
才能让全世界为你倾倒
to get anywhere in this world.
我去了 - 上吧
Okay? - Yes.
他叫什么名字啊
What's his name?
你叫什么名字来着
Um, what's, uh, your name again?
Gil - Gil
Gil. - Gil.
他名字叫Gil - 好的
Okay, his name is Gil. - Okay.
他在这里上班 - 这里吗
He works here. - Here?
对 跟他聊聊这个
Yeah. Talk about that.
你好 Gil 我是Gillian Belk
Hey, Gil. My name is Gillian Belk,
我也在这里上班 哦不 对不起 是Jillian
And I work here too. No, I'm sorry... Jillian.
我叫Jillian Bleck 不对 是Blelk
I'm Jillian Bleck. Nope. Blelk.
是Blocks 我叫Bling
Blocks. My name's Bling...
别 从头开始
Don't... just start from the top.
我叫Lennon - 再来一次
Uh... My name's Lennon. - Just start over.
不行了 我要吐了
I can't. I'm gonna throw up.
你好 Bill 我叫Jillian Belk
Hi, Bill. My name is Jillian Belk.
买♥♥买♥♥买♥♥
And I'll shop for you.
这是我的竞选口号♥ 想了可久呢
That's my slogan. I thought of it.
记得多买♥♥点果味早餐麦片
Just make sure you buy lots of fruity pebbles, okay?
它们简直好吃到爆
They're bomb-dot-com.
我要拿这些来检查一下
Yeah, I'm gonna need to take these for testing.
看看里面有没有蓖麻毒素
Make sure there's no ricin.
没检查出有什么毒
Mmm. No, don't taste any ricin in it,
但还是要拿回去检查 这是安全需要
But I'm gonna keep these for testing... It's a security thing.
让我吃点 太好吃了
Let me get some of those, man. They're so good.
这是老子的午饭 你们这群小垃圾
That's my lunch, you troll!
你说什么
What did you say?
打我啊 来啊
Come on. Come on.
呃
Ugh!
其实你应该多跟我们一起玩的
You should, like, come hang out with us sometime, man.
是哦 肯定会很有趣
Yeah, that'd be cool.
大伙们
Ladies and gentlemen,
大家请看过来
If I could please have your attention.
看好了
Up here.
不骗你们 我可是Montez的医生哦
Hey, I'm Montez's real doctor. I swear to God.
我看过他的小♥弟♥弟♥
I've seen his penis,
我还用这个手指爆过他的菊花
and I've stuck this finger up his heinie.
问题来了 为什么明明谷歌♥显示
One question... Why would Montez Walker need
Montez Walker没有身体疾病
to eat healthy when a Google search showed
他还要健康饮食呢
Montez Walker having zero healthy problems?
很明显他就是个大骗子
Sounds to me like he's a healthy liar.
Jillian Belk是个好女孩儿
Jillian Belk is a real cool chica,
我们之间很有共鸣
And I vibe with her.
对了 我是个医生 我真的是
Oh, I'm a doctor, and I-I'm a real doctor,
我赞同她
And I approve of that.
我也赞同我自己
And I approve of that.
我是Jillian Belk 买♥♥买♥♥买♥♥
I'm Jillian Belk, and I'll shop for you.
这是姐的口号♥ - 这是她自己编的
That's my slogan. - She made it up herself.
请大家支持她 万岁
Let's show some respect. Wayman!
鼓掌啊 这才对嘛
Clap. There we go.
大家好 我是Bill
Hi, I'm Bill, and I'll be
我将担任今天下午辩论会的主持人
your moderator for this afternoon's debate.
第一个问题我要问Walker先生
First question is for Mr. Walker.
如果你是休息室经理 你的第一步将会做什么
Mr. Walker, what would be your first act as break-room manager?
谢谢你 Bill
Thank you, Bill.
我会买♥♥大家所需要的东西
Uh, I'm gonna give the people what they need...
健康的有机食品
Healthy, organic snacks.
笑死老娘了 我们需要的是一个
Interesting, because what we need is someone
能够帮大家买♥♥到想要之物的人
who will shop for what we want.
同意
Amen.
大家需要的是知道自己要什么
Don't you know people need to be told what they want,
因为这才是他们的真实所需
'cause it's actually what they need?
你听谁说的
Where'd you learn that...
是从让你这样饮食的老婆那儿吗
From your wife that has you on that diet?
太绝了
Damn!
我才不愿意吃他老婆那套 你们想吗
I don't want to be on his wife's diet. Do you?
我也不想 - 对吧
No, I don't. - No.
你觉得我想把我的妙脆角
Don't you think I want my Bugles
和我的亚摩斯净水机扔在那吗
And my famous amoses and all that stuff there?
买♥♥买♥♥买♥♥
I'll shop for you.
你最好给我离远点
You better back up, woman, or this health kick
不然我就让你见识下我的空手道 老子是黄带
gonna turn into a karate kick. I got a beige belt!
我可是黄带哦 - 我恨你
It's a beige belt. - I hate you.
去你♥妈♥的♥
him up.
买♥♥买♥♥买♥♥
I'll shop for you.
你真的是疯了
You're really... You're trippin' right now.
我现在身体就很健康好吗
I mean, nah. I mean, I like being healthy.
状态很好
I feel good.
你们不想有个好状态吗
Don't y'all want to feel good too?
工作狂（2011）
Workaholics
剧集 | 工作狂（2011） | 导航列表