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Modern Family S04E24

Part 2 Nov. 30, 2019, 10:56 p.m.

不不帮帮她这样能进行得快一些
No, no, help her, so this will go faster.
而且她让我想起了我外婆
And she reminds me of my abuela,
她也带这样的头巾也曾偷窃
with her head scarf and her petty theft charges.
在这里法官阁下
Here, your honor.
我是米奇尔·普里契特 "曼查勾"小姐的律师
I'm mitchell pritchett, attorney to miss Manchego.
-是曼查卡 -好的
- Menchaca. - Ah, yeah...
你们准备好辩诉了吗
Are you ready to enter a plea?
当然准备好了
Absolutely.
我认为这种事件完全没有理由
I see no reason why this matter should
占用更多贵法庭宝贵的时间了
take up any more of the court's valuable time.
无罪法官大人
Not guilty, your honor.
为什么
Why?
我需要点时间准备一下
Gonna need a minute.
看我爸给了我什么
Look what my dad just gave me.
拜托你告诉我盒子里装的不是你妈
Please tell me that's not your mom.
不是她已经给自己选好骨灰罐了
No, no. She picked out her own urn.
我爸一直都说
My dad keeps saying
那罐子小一♥码♥ 不过她还是挤进去了
it's a size too small but she squeezed into it.
这些东西是她留给孩子们的
No, this is stuff she left for the kids.
-我能打开吗 -能啊
- Can I... open it? - Yeah.
里面有张纸条是给你的
Wow. There's a note for you.
我不敢看
I can't read it.
-好吧 -你来好吗
- Okay. - Would you?
好的
All right.
"亲爱的菲尔
"Dear phil,
你一直都是最棒的儿子
you've always been the most wonderful son,
而我现在需要你为我做最后一件事"
and now I need you to do one last thing for me."
不
Oh, no!
她一定是让我把她的骨灰泼到牧师脸上
She's gonna ask me to throw her ashes in the pope's face.
"不要告诉你父亲
"Don't say anything to your father
因为他一定会反对
because he'll just resist,
但是有一位名叫安妮·菲茨曼斯的女士
but there's a woman named Annie Fitzsimmons
她就住在几条街外
who lives a few streets over.
我们和她并不太熟但我一向很欣赏她
We don't know her very well, but I've always admired her,
我觉得她会和你父亲很般配
and I think she'd be perfect for your dad.
因此在你回家前
So before you go home,
我希望你能撮合他们"
I want you to fix him up with her."
这太疯狂了
That is crazy!
"我知道这听起来很疯狂
"I know this sounds crazy,
但这里的单身男士很紧俏
but single men are in short supply here.
会有一群工于心计的狐狸精
And a lot of scheming harpies will swoop in
在你父亲尚未察觉的情况下蜂拥而至
before your father knows what hit him.
我爱弗兰克
I love Frank,
但任何会做饭的女人都能牵着他鼻子走"
but he'll follow anything with a casserole."
我真觉得难以置信
I don't believe this.
这也太快了
It's too soon,
何况我爸又不是动画片里的熊熊
and my dad's not a cartoon bear.
他有足够的能力作出理智的判断
He's perfectly capable of making intelligent decisions.
爸妈我做了饼干
Hey, guys? I made cookies.
太好了我还以为是邻居家做的
Oh, good. I thought that was a neighbor.
孩子们奶奶给你们每个人留了些东西
Hey, kids, your grandma left each of you something.
太棒了是乐步鞋
Cool! Rockports!
只是用了鞋盒子而已
It's just the box.
我的天有一封信
oh, my god. There's a letter.
我觉得我还没做好心理准备
I don't know if I'm ready for this.
尽管如果这是奶奶写的
Although if grandma wrote it,
她一定事先感觉到我已经准备好了
she must have sensed I was ready.
因为你俩有特殊的感情纽带吗
Because you had such a bond?
你也感觉到了吗
You felt it, too?
海莉跟我们说说你那封信的内容
Haley, why don't you tell us what yours says?
写得真贴心
Well, it's so sweet.
是关于我的内在是多么美丽还有
It's about how beautiful I am inside and--
帅啊首饰
Score! Jewelry
快来看
Check it out!
看看
Oh, look at that.
你奶奶可喜欢怀表了
Your grandma loved pocket watches.
她说过怀表让人看起来很高贵
Aw! She said they made a man look dignified.
这条链子是为了防止有人吞下它吗
Is this chain in case you swallow it?
不是但我突然好庆幸有这条链子
No, but suddenly I'm glad it's there.
-打火机 -信里怎么说
- A lighter? - Huh. What does the note say?
"这是一个打火机"
"This is a lighter."
我不明白
I don't understand.
你还要她说得多清楚呢
How much clearer could she have been?
我觉得你不要想太多了
I wouldn't read too much into it.
奶奶一直很爱你们
Your grandma loved you very much.
她只是在生命最后做了些奇怪的事情
She just did a couple of bizarre things towards the end.
艾丽克斯我可以帮你
Here, Alex, I can help you out with that.
你现在很困很困想睡觉
You are getting very sleepy.
破烂旧打火机并不是个很糟的礼物
A crappy old lighter is not a sucky gift.
亲爱的你不打算完成你妈妈的遗嘱吗
Honey, hey, hey. So you're not gonna do what your mom asked?
在她葬礼这天把我爸
Marry off my dad to a complete stranger
许配给一个陌生人吗我想不会
on the day of her funeral? I think not.
这可是她的遗愿
It was her last wish.
等我爸准备好了
When my dad is ready,
他会去挑他喜欢的女友
he gets to pick his own girlfriend.
这可是妻子去世的一大好处
That's the big upside to your wife dying.
再就是以后说话不用脑子也没事了
Also, not having to think before you speak.
是啊
Yeah.
法官阁下这一切都归结于此
Your honor, it all boils down to this.
这家旅馆欠"曼查勾"小姐的
The motel owes Miss Menchengo--
-曼查卡 -该死每次都错
- Menchaca. - Damn it. Every time.
薪水高于她拿走的
more in wages than she ever could've taken
香皂和超小瓶洗发水的价值
in soaps and tiny shampoos.
好吧案件驳回
Fine. Case dismissed.
太好了
Yes!
谢谢太谢谢了
Oh! Gracias! Muchas gracias!
-不客气不客气 -太谢谢了
- De nada. De nada. - Muchas gracias.
看见没我胜诉了
Did you see that? I won!
-真是不敢相信 -看到了
- I-I can't believe it! - Yeah.
你赢一次这么高兴我很怕你胜诉率很低
It scares me that winning is such a surprise for you.
下一个马修·普乐斯科违规停车
Next! Matthew Plonsker. Parking violations.
我还以为会有点生疏但显然没有
I thought I'd be a little rusty, but apparently not.
又来找我吗真"好"呢
Oh! Really? Sweet.
去吧把错误都犯在他身上
Yes! Go make your mistakes with him.
我可不想因为卖♥♥淫坐牢
I don't want to go to jail for prostitution.
你以为你能嫖得起我吗
Like you could afford me.
在我看来在那个重要的下午
It seems to me it wasn't only the meter
并不只是停车计费表坏了
that was broken that fateful afternoon.
不仅如此
Nay!
是整个刑事司法系统坏了
It was the entire criminal justice system.
因此我要提出的是
Therefore I submit to you,
那晚影响我的客户判断力的唯一一样东西
the only "Influence" my client was under that night
就是他对划船的热爱
was his love of boating.
可耻啊
Shame!
我只是不懂她为什么给我一个打火机
I just don't get it. Why would she give me a lighter?
也许她希望你把你所有丑衣服都烧掉
Maybe she wants you to burn all your clothes.
是不是我们并不像我想的那样有特殊的感情纽带
Is it possible we didn't have the connection I thought we did?
我不知道你也听老爸说了
I don't know. You heard dad.
她去世前一直在接受药物治疗
She was on all that medication towards the end.
人们服药期间总会做些诡异的事
People do weird things when they're on drugs.
迪兰在牙根管治疗后服了止痛药
When Dylan was on vicodin after his root canal,
他买♥♥了一整套《女医生》光盘
he bought the complete DVD set of "Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman."
女孩们请离开
Get going, ladies.
泳池只对当地居民开放
The pool's for residents only.
好的对不起我们这就走
Oh, okay. Sorry. We'll leave.
不我们不走这里又没人
Uh, no, we won't. There's nobody here.
-海莉 -为什么我们不能用这泳池
- Haley! - Why can't we use the pool?
这是规定
Because those are the rules.
有什么问题吗
Are we gonna have a problem here?
你可吓不着我我蹲过真正的监狱
You don't scare me. I've been in real jail.