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Modern Family S04E14

Part 1 Nov. 30, 2019, 10:55 p.m.

好了别动宝贝
Okay, hold still, honey.
我怕你又打到我身上
I'm afraid you're going to hit me again.
别担心我这次只练推杆
Don't worry. I'm just putting this time.
我不是最厉害的高尔夫球手
I'm not the strongest golfer,
我觉得那拖累了我的生意
and I think it's holding me back in business.
真遗憾卖♥♥♥房♥♥合同不是在蹦床公园谈成的
Too bad deals aren't closed in a trampoline park.
[鲁道尔夫哥特夫斯均为蹦床动作名称]
我可以先屈体做一个鲁道尔夫
I'd just lazy-back into a Rudolph
然后做个哥特夫斯在公♥司♥一步高升
into a quadriffus right up the corporate ladder.
老爸你今晚要来看我的歌♥剧吗
Hey, dad, you coming to my play tonight?
你的歌♥剧你不过是个画布景的
"Your" Play? You only painted the sets.
是啊米开朗奇罗也不过画了西斯廷教堂
Yeah, and Michelangelo "Only" painted the Sixteenth Chapel.
或许你不该把脸凑得离油漆罐太近[毒晕]
Maybe don't keep your face so close to the paint cans.
抱歉伙计我要上高尔夫课
Sorry, buddy, I'm getting a golf lesson
然后得和一位客户打球
and then I'm playing with a client,
但你下次表演我会尽力去看的
But I'll try to make your next performance.
-菲尔 -小忙哦
-Phil! - Little busy.
你总是这样
Oh, you always do this.
完全不动脑子就把东西塞进冰箱里
You cram stuff in the freezer without thinking about it.
我一打开门冰冻的火鸡差点砸我脚上
I opened the door, and a frozen turkey almost fell on my foot.
我老是打得偏左
I keep pulling it to the left.
你确定这房♥子是水平的吗
Are we sure the house is level?
你一点都不感到抱歉吗
Are you not the least bit sorry?
我的脚趾头差点断了
I could have broken a toe.
亲爱的我每天都要为一堆
Honey, I'm sorry for dozens of things
实际发生的事情道歉
every day that actually happen.
如果我连没发生的事情都要道歉
If I start apologizing for things that don't happen,
我还能干成什么事儿啊
how productive of a person would I be?
你的高尔夫教授来了
Hey, your golf pro's here!
-大家好啊 -大家好啊
- Hola, hola. - Hello, everybody!
非常感谢你来给我上速成课杰
Thanks so much for the quick lesson, Jay.
把我当作一块粘土
Just think of me as a blob of clay,
静候你那经验丰富的双手
waiting for your experienced hands
来爱抚雕琢
to caress and coax me--
高尔夫第一法则别废话
First rule of golf-- shh.
-好吧 -很好
- Okay. - Good.
如果你打算这么臭脾气一整天
If you're going to be a grump all day,
当初为什么要答应来教他
why did you even say that you were going to teach him?
因为我那些外孙就靠他吃饭了
Because he's how my grandkids get food.
他在这啊
There he is.
太感谢你答应照顾宝宝了
Ay, thank you so much for taking care of the baby.
小卡让我帮他的歌♥剧打杂
Cam has me running all kinds of errands for the play.
是吗那你得时刻注意来电显示了
Yeah, well, you gotta keep your eye on the caller I.D.
我得去干洗店拿戏服
I have to go to the dry cleaners to pick up the costumes...
然后去拿干冰用来造雾
Then I have to go get the dry ice for the fog machine.
可能还得给小卡买♥♥些花
And maybe I'll go get Cam some flowers.
艾丽克斯可以帮你
Oh, Alex can help you with all that.
太棒了好了走吧
Oh, perfect. Okay, let's go.
我们不能迟到
We can't be late,
不然可就没有干冰只能泪流满面了
or there won't be any dry ice in the house.
[音似:No dry eyes in the house
形容众人都为某事垂泪没有一人眼睛是干的]
-说得不错 -什么
- Good one. - What?
你们都去好好玩吧去吧别担心
You guys have fun. Go on. Nothing to worry about.
我这里没问题
I got it handled here.
小心点
Be careful.
别担心嘴巴张着就行
Don't worry, just keep your mouth open.
没事真的没事
We're fine. It's fine.
好了大家能静一静听我说吗
Okay, can I have everyone's attention, please?
罗本我这里打个灯光
Reuben? Hit me with a spot.
太刺眼了放个粉色滤光板上去
That's a little harsh. Throw a pink gel on that.
太棒了很好
That's great. Perfect.
好了我会录下今天的排练
All right, I will be recording today's rehearsal,
但你们别在镜头前感觉不自在
but don't let that make you self-conscious.
我只会用这个来指出你们的错误
I'm only using it to pinpoint your mistakes.
第二我让全体剧组成员
Secondly, I have granted full set access
都能见到莫琳·希克
to Maureen Schick,
她今晚将来看你们的表演
who will be reviewing your show tonight.
完了她很恶毒的
Uh-oh, she's vicious.
我们的前任音乐老师纳玛奇先生
Our last music teacher, Mr. Namagachi,
读了她的文章《烂得一团糟》心碎难平
never recovered from her article, "Anything blows."
但公平地说我看过那场表演
But in fairness, I saw that production,
女高音主角绝对是灾难
and the lead soprano was an absolute disaster.
无意冒犯苏菲
No offense, Sophie.
你从那以后就全面绽放了亲爱的
You've blossomed since then, sweetie, okay?
不要给她的麦克风装电池好吗很好
No batteries in her mic, okay? Great.
最后马库斯·塔伯特
And lastly, Marcus Talbot.
伙计们他感觉不太舒服
Guys, he's feeling a little under the weather.
不要怕他在家养精蓄"嗓"呢
Fear not. He's home resting his instrument,
他今晚还是能登台表演
and he will be ready for the show tonight.
但现在需要一个替身来排练
But I will need a phantom for this rehearsal.
所以谁上
So, anyone...
我想我能试试
I guess I could help.
我不知道马库斯是怎么当上主角的
I don't know how Marcus ever got the lead.
但我知道他是怎么生病的
But I know how he got sick--
就因为他那矫揉造作的恶心表演
from chewing all that scenery.
现在是我从那个虚伪的冒牌货手中
This was my chance to earn it back
夺回主角的机会
from that insincere phony.
但首先先为可怜的马库斯做个默祷吧
But first, a silent prayer for our fallen captain marcus.
祝好运老朋友
Godspeed, old friend.
好无聊啊他死了吗
This is boring. Is he dead?
没有他没死他在睡觉呢
No, he's not dead. He's just sleeping.
婴儿需要很多睡眠
Babies need to sleep a lot
才能长得更大更强壮更聪明
so they grow bigger and stronger and smarter.
邓太太好露西你好啊
Hey, Mrs. D. Hey, Lucy.
每次都叫错
Every time.
T恤不错嘛
Well, that's a nice shirt.
谢谢我自己设计的
Thanks. I designed it myself.
是最畅销的一款
It's my best seller.
我真嫉妒你的生活如此有目标
I'm so jealous you know what you want to do with your life.
我要是想你一样志向远大就好了
I wish I was inspired like you.
或者目标更高远一些
Or, you know, aim higher.
你得去体验些新鲜事物
Open yourself up to some new experiences
然后发现什么
and find out what--
-我的天 -你还好吗
- Oh, my g-- - are you okay?
没事只是
Fine. Just...
又踩到你♥爸♥该死的高尔夫球了
slipped on one of your father's stupid golf balls.
很好你吵醒他了
Good, you woke him up.
他可能是饿了我刚刚喂了他
Maybe he's hungry. I just fed him,
但我觉得奶粉总是比不上母乳
but I don't think bottles can live up to the real thing.
也许我能让他安静下来
Maybe I can calm him down.
你真贴心但他今天超级烦躁
Oh, that's very sweet of you, but he's super fussy today.
宝宝一旦烦躁他们他们
And when babies are fussy, they--they...
对啊我超擅长哄宝宝的
Yeah, I'm good with babies.
你应该看他玩躲猫猫他超级厉害
You should see him play peek-a-boo. He's amazing.
没有啦只是不错而已
No. I'm good.
我认识一个芝加哥的家伙他才厉害
I know a guy in Chicago-- he's amazing.
该死
Dang it!
开什么玩笑草皮像火箭一样飞出去了
Are you kiddin' me? That divot flew out of there like a rocket.
我决定对菲尔友好些
I decided to go gentle with Phil,
那对我来说不容易
which didn't come easy to me,
因为一旦涉及运动
because I've always been a bit of a drill sergeant
我就变得像操练军士一样严格
when it comes to sports.
但对于新宝宝
And with the new baby,
歌♥洛莉亚总是埋怨我不够耐心
Gloria's been buggin' me to have more patience.
拜托他都好好存活一个月了
But come on. He's been alive a month.
支撑着小脑袋不掉能有多难
How hard is it to support your own head?
搞什么鬼
What the hell?
好啊小伙子们
Hello, boys.
车不错啊胡娇
What a sweet ride, Pepper.
你们在这里干嘛
What are you guys doing here?
我已经练习高尔夫几周的时间了