路西法（2016）

Lucifer S02E16

Part 2 Aug. 29, 2020, 8:35 p.m.

But in actual fact, He's a dick.
听着如果你想冲我发火
Look, if you want to be angry with me,
那就发吧
you just go right on ahead.
你需要我是谁我就可以是谁
I can be anything you need me to be.
好吧别扯淡了
Right, enough of this idle chit-chat.
是时候把话挑明了
Time to tell you what the charade's really about.
你想干什么
What do you desire?
逃避一个想报复你的前妻
To avoid a vengeful ex-wife?
还是多年的退税款你葫芦里卖♥♥的什么药
Years of back taxes? What's your game?
这是比谁先眨眼吗
Is this a staring contest?
这个我可是很在行
'Cause, you know, I'm pretty good at those.
怎么可能
How is this possible?
对了我猜你是
Oh, right, yes, I bet you're on
磕了什么很厉害的药吧
some really amazing drugs, aren't you?
如果这样的话给我也试试
If so, share-zies.
你不应该待在这里
You're not supposed to be in here.
算了
Never mind.
反正我不想跟这个骗子周♥旋♥了
I'm done with this fraud, anyway.
很高兴见到你萨麦尔
It was real good seeing you, Samael.
你刚说什么
What did you say?
爸
Dad?
-爸之前来过人间吗 -据我所知没有
- Has Dad ever visited Earth before? - Not that I'm aware of.
再说了他现在来干什么
And besides, why would He do so now?
不清楚也许是因为
I don't know, maybe because
我们企图推♥翻♥他
we're plotting to overthrow Him.
就算是这样小路
Even so, Luci,
这不是咱爸的行事风格
that's not the way Dad operates.
如果他有麻烦
If He has a problem,
他会派一个亲信来比如我
He sends an emissary, like me,
或是火烧荆棘
or maybe a burning bush.
典出《圣经·旧约》
出埃及记三章二节
这个上帝·约翰逊怎么知道萨麦尔这个名字的
So how does this God Johnson know Samael, hmm?
我的名字
My name.
等下我知道了
Oh, wait, I know.
-你知道了 -网络
- You do? - The Internet!
网上能查到好多神奇的事情
It's truly amazing what you can find online.
你看过那个一只猫
Have you seen that video with the cat
跳进箱子里的视频没
that jumps inside the box?
很有意思但我根本没
Very funny, but I didn't even
自我介绍说我是路西法
introduce myself as Lucifer.
而且这事有点蹊跷...
And there's something strange about...
我说不清
I can't explain it.
因为这只是一个凡人神经病在说疯话
Because it's just crazy talk coming from a mentally ill human.
-可能还有一个原因 -好
- Well, there might be another reason. - Right.
什么原因
What's that?
地球是他最喜欢的玩具
Well, Earth is His favorite toy.
也许他厌倦了远远地看着它
Maybe He got fed up of looking at it from afar.
这里并没有那么糟
I mean, it's not an entirely awful place.
就算是你也不得不承认
Even you have to admit that.
现在是你在说疯话了小路因为地球
Now you're the one sounding crazy, Luci, because Earth--
地球和天堂根本没有可比性
Earth is nothing compared to Heaven.
得了吧老哥
Oh, come now, brother.
我觉得你越来越喜欢这里了不是吗
I think you've grown to like the place, haven't you?
得了诚实点
Come on, be honest.
我们回天堂后你肯定会
When we return to Heaven, there must be something
怀念这里的什么对吗
that you're gonna miss, eh?
或着也许是某个人
Or someone, maybe?
一个穿着紧身皮裤很爱耍刀的人
Someone in tight leather pants with a penchant for knives?
我当然说的是麦子
I'm referring to Maze, of course.
快说伙计们
Come on, guys.
真的这么疯狂吗
Is it really so crazy?
如果上帝就在我们之中呢
I mean, what if God was one of us?
就是一个和我们一样的俗人
Just a slob, like one of us.
就是或只是一个...
Exactly. Or just a...
公交上的路人甲
A stranger on a bus.
我父亲绝不会乘坐公共交通
My father would never use public transport.
那首歌♥完全不切实际
That song is completely unrealistic.
-什么歌♥ -我讨厌的那首歌♥
- What song? - The song I hate
就像讨厌伪君子一样
almost as much as I hate these hypocrites,
比如说上帝·约翰逊这种人
like God Johnson.
伪君子吗不好说
Hypocrite? Hmm, I don't know.
我觉得你们两个人倒是有点像
I see some similarities between the two of you.
那人不是我父亲
That man is not my father.
那是件好事因为这样他就有可能是凶手了
Well, good thing, 'cause he might be our killer.
什么天啊艾拉你怎么知道的
Whaaat? Oh, my God, Ella, how do you know that?
我来告诉你我是怎么知道的
I'll tell you how I know that,
因为咱们的受害者是秃子
because our victim was bald.
而从尸体上采集指纹很难
It's very hard to get prints off a body,
于是我祭出了紫外线
so I whipped out the ultraviolet
多波域光源仪然后好了受害者的
alternate light source, and...boom, complete set
脑袋上有一套完整的指纹
on the victim's noggin.
指纹属于厄尔·约翰逊
They match one Earl Johnson,
得州敖德萨的石油大亨
wealthy oil magnate from Odessa, Texas.
这上面说几个月前他把所有钱捐了出去
It says here his wife committed him a few months ago
然后他开始自称"上帝"
after he gave all of his money away
于是他妻子把他送进了精神病院
and started calling himself "God."
约翰逊先生从没有说他碰触过受害者的身体
Mr. Johnson never said that he touched the victim's body.
更别说他杀了人
Left out the killing part as well.
证明他就是杀手是揭露他的
And proving he's the killer is the perfect way
伪神崇拜的最佳办法
to expose his false idolatry.
我们出发吧
Right, shall we?
不行
No, we shan't.
因为你未经允许就跟他交谈
Because you spoke to him without permission,
所以我还得申请一场特别听证会
I had to apply for a special hearing
才能讯问他一次
just to interview him.
这至少得花几天时间
That'll take at least a few days,
所以真是太谢谢你了
so thank you for that.
咨♥询♥台
你好
Hello, there.
我想订一间套房♥
I'd like a suite for the evening, please.
最好是能看见外面风景的
Preferably one with a view.
你在开玩笑吗
Are you joking?
这是一家精神病院
This is a psychiatric hospital.
抱歉我没有说清楚缘由
Apologies, I'm skipping ahead.
我就是那个独一无二的路西法·晨星
I am the one and only Lucifer Morningstar.
魔鬼黑魔王
The Devil. Dark Lord?
老天啊魔王
For goodness sake, Beelzebub!
很明显我需要马上入院
Look, I clearly need to be committed right away.
是啊但我们快满了老兄
Yeah, we're at near capacity, pal.
所以除非你危害到自身或是其他人
So unless you're a danger to yourself or others...
-这样够格了吗 -完全够
- How's that? - Great.
好极了
Lovely.
《Humble Pro》 Cherry Glazerr
*I walked into the kitchen*
*And I said "Hey, baby, what's cooking?"*
*Tapatio baked into the pizzas*
见鬼的
Dammit!
*Sometimes steak fajitas...*
谁又偷吃了我的布丁
Who stole my pudding again?
马科维茨
Markowitz?
要尝一口吗
Want a taste?
丹
除了偷吃我们冰箱里的东西
Don't you have better things to do
你没别的事可做吗
than to raid our fridge?
我正准备永远离开这个地方
I was about to leave this place altogether,
但是我碰到了突发事件
but I hit an unexpected snag.
现在我需要转移注意力
Now I need to distract myself with something.
你好啊注意力
Hello, something.
为了避免我要释放
You know, just in case I'm giving off an
"我毫无自尊"的错误信♥号♥♥
"I have zero self-respect" vibe,
我先把话说清楚
let me make it clear.
把手拿开
Hands off.
我宁愿一个人坐在家里
I'd rather sit at home alone,
伸手不见五指也不想和你待在一起
and in the dark, than to hang out with you.