鲍勃心动

Bob Hearts Abishola S01E11

Part 3 Feb. 11, 2020, 11:30 a.m.

-是的 -胡扯
- Yes. - Rats.
我们就这么说定了吗
So, do we have a deal?
你照我说的做
You do exactly as I tell you,
我的遗嘱里我会让你成为
and in my will, I will make you
麦克斯多特治疗袜的
majority shareholder and president
大股东和总裁
of MaxDot Therapeutic Hosiery.
那鲍勃和道格拉斯呢
What about Bob and Douglas?
这事只有你知我知
This has to stay between you and me.
我去世后他们才会知道
They don't need to know till after I'm gone.
你永远活在我的心里
You'll never be gone in my heart.
好的很好
Okay, great.
现在
Now,
在我们谈论你的小丑妆之前
before we talk about your clown makeup,
我要你到我家去
I need you to run over to my house.
在我床边的床头柜里
And in my nightstand, next to my bed,
有一个
is a...
我们就叫它背部按♥摩♥器
let's call it a "Back massager."
看看电池有没有电然后给我带过来
Check the batteries and bring it to me.
如果你背疼我可以帮你按♥摩♥
If your back is hurting, I can work on it for you.
不你肯定不行
No, you really can't.
现在就去
Now go.
我只想感谢你给我这个机会
I just want to thank you for this opportunity
因为相信我
and for believing in me...
快去
Go!
智能语♥音♥助手
Hey, Siri.
给道格拉斯·维勒打电♥话♥
Call Douglas Wheeler.
当晚
你来真的吗
Really?
你真是太小气了
You are being very foolish.
我会一直说到你回话
I'm just going to keep talking until you talk back.
车上所有人都会知道我们的事
All these people will know our business.
好吧那么
Okay, then.
是的我应该先问你和楚库埃梅卡约会的事
Yes, I should've asked you first about dating Chukwuemeka,
但我觉得你不在乎
but I didn't think you'd care.
你怕我说不行
You were afraid I would say no.
我怕你会说不行
I was afraid you'd say no.
那个座位有人吗
Is anybody sitting there?
她在这坐着你瞎了吗
She's sitting there. Are you blind?
在我看来
Look at it from my viewpoint.
这个尼日利亚单身汉有份好工作
There is a single Nigerian man with a good job
腰围三十二英寸
and a 32-inch waistline.
没错不好的一点是他来自伊博部落
Yes, he's from the Igbo tribe, and that is unfortunate,
但他还是尼日利亚人
but he's still Nigerian.
在底特律这没什么嗤之以鼻的
Which, in Detroit, is nothing to blow your nose at.
但你却背着我
You went behind my back.
那算是什么朋友
What kind of friend does that?
孤独的朋友
A lonely friend.
一个丈夫已经过世的朋友
A friend with a dead husband.
她真的没坐在那儿
She's really not sitting there.
是的她坐着呢
Yes, she is!
艾比希拉
Abishola,
请原谅我
please forgive me.
我不在乎你和谁约会
I don't care about who you date.
我在乎的是你对我撒谎
I care about you lying to me.
你要去哪里
Where are you going?
我有点事
Oh, I have to run some errands.
我现在可以坐那了吗
Now can I sit there?
想坐就坐
Do whatever you want.
你们争的那个人他性感吗
So, this guy you guys are fighting over, is he hot?
我还是站着吧
I'll stand.
那我们达成协议了吗
So, we have an agreement?
你回学校
You go back to school
取得商务学位
and get a business degree.
好的当然可以
Yeah, absolutely.
但你听着不太上心
You don't sound very enthusiastic.
我有只是商务有点无聊
I am, it's just... business is kind of boring.
你想让我提名你为麦克斯多特的总裁
You want me to name you president of MaxDot,
你就得有商务学位
you need a business degree.
是吗那我可以把这些业务
Do I? Or do I delegate the business stuff
委托给我的下属吗
to my underlings?
知道吗你还是算了
You know what? Never mind.
好吧我去读书
All right, I'll do it!
你不能一直抽大♥麻♥
And you can't keep smoking pot all the time.
只在周末和周三抽
Just weekends and Wednesdays.
-不准再抽 -不再抽了
- No more! - No more!
找个好女孩
And you find a nice girl.
结婚成家
Get married, start a family.
好吧你要明白这一直是我的目标
Okay, to be clear, that has always been my goal.
好女孩约会结束的时候
Nice girls don't get paid $1,000
可不会要一千美元的报酬
at the end of the date.
你怎么知道的
How do you know about that?
你记到公♥司♥帐上了
You charged it to the company.
我还给了她一张税表
I had to send her a W-2.
还在给她发工资吗
She still on the payroll?
你要不要当总裁了
You want this or not?
我要当然我会找到一个好女孩
I do. And, yes, I will find a nice girl.
但是鲍勃和克里斯汀娜呢
But what about Bob and Christina?
这事只有你知我知
This has to stay between you and me.
我去世后他们才会知道
They don't need to know till after I'm dead.
不会等很多年的吧
Which won't be for many, many years.
当然会
Sure.
现在我不知道我还剩多少时间
Now, I don't know how much
所以我们得立马行动了
time I have left, so we need to get going.
好的
Fine.
你要去哪里
Hey, where you headed?
去理发
To get a haircut.
你要见我吗
You wanted to see me?
是的
Yeah.
我遗嘱已经订了一部分
I've made some decisions about my will,
我想你会很高兴的
and I think you're gonna be very happy.
好吧
Oh, okay.
有几件事
There's just a couple of things
我们得先干完
we need to go over.
稍后
所以当我明白了
So, when it became clear to me
医药销♥售♥的未来
that the future of pharmaceutical sales
是网络
would be online,
我就开始开♥发♥一个网页
I began developing a website
叫来问楚库埃梅卡网
called AskChukwuemeka.Com.
这就是我聪明的地方了
And here is the part where I'm very clever...
艾比希拉说得没错
Abishola was right.
他好无聊
He is so boring!
...处方药和非处方药
...over-the-counter and prescription drugs.
我每次推荐用药后药品制♥造♥商
Every time I recommend a drug, I would get a penny
就会给我一分...
from each drug manufacturer...
他的头真完美
His head is perfect.
要是没有嘴巴就好了
If only it didn't have a mouth.
如果有一半人向我征求意见
...if half of them ask my opinion,
那就是很多分
that is a lot of pennies...
也许如果我不听他说话
Maybe if I didn't listen to him,
我们就可以幸福地生活下去
we could make a life together.
税后也是一大笔钱
...even after taxes,
这会让我变得很有钱
this will make me a very wealthy man.
别听别听别听
Don't listen, don't listen, don't listen.
我会用我的财富去帮助尼日利亚的人
I will use my great riches to help the people of Nigeria.
天啊不要再说了
Oh, dear God, stop talking!
也许以后有一天
And maybe someday,
网飞上会上一部电影
there will be a movie on the Netflix
讲述我默默无闻的...
that will tell the story of my humble...
没有用
It's not working!
我没办法把他过滤了
I cannot drown him out!