好汉两个半（2003）

Two and a Half Men S05E13

Part 1 Nov. 17, 2020, 2:09 p.m.

not only did that movie suck,it blew chunks,bit the big one,
这部电影不仅仅是难看简直让人恶心到吐
and then came back and sucked again.
然后把吐的吞进去再吐出来
Did you pay for it? Yeah.
你付钱了? 是啊
With an hour and a half of my childhood that I'll never get back.
用我那一去不复返的一个半小时童年时光
Hey,I've seen your childhood.
喂我见识过你的童年
It's not a big loss.
这不算个重大损失
You said you wanted to see it.
是你自己说想要看的
Because it was rated R.
因为它是R级
But there wasn't a single boob in it.
结果连个露胸的镜头都没有
You were there.
你在那儿呢
Oh,my god.
哦天呐
I know. And he talks to me that way all the time.
我知道他一直都这么说我呢
That's cynthia sullivan.
那是辛西娅·沙利文.
Who's cynthia sullivan?
谁是辛西娅·沙利文?
She and her husband used to be friends with me and judith.
她和她丈夫以前是我和朱迪丝的朋友
Yeah,so?
是吗所以呢?
Well,I haven't seen her since judith and I split up.
哦自从我和朱迪丝分手之后就没见过她
I-I don't know if i should say hello.
我-我不知道是不是该跟她打个招呼
They kind of took judith's side in the divorce.
因为他们在我离婚的时候站在朱迪丝那边
Wait a minute. We're allowed to take sides?
等一下我们可以选择支持一方?
Nobody told me. Is it too late?
没人告诉过我啊是不是太晚了已经?
That's not funny,charlie.
那不好笑查理
He's very hurtful to everybody,and for no reason.
他对任何人都那么刻薄而且是无缘无故的
Alan?
艾伦?
Oh,hey,cynthia.
哦嘿辛西亚
Wow,what a nice surprise. How are you?
哇真让人惊喜啊你怎么样啊?
Just great. 'S'seen a long time.
还好好久不见了
Hi,jake. Look how big you're getting.
你好杰克看看你都长这么大了啊
It's called puberty.
这叫青春期
It's called donuts.
这叫甜甜圈
Donuts don't make hair.
甜甜圈没有毛
Uh,cynthia,this is my brother charlie.
辛西亚这是我哥哥查理
Hello.
你好
Uh,cynthia and her husband were good friends with me
呃当我和朱迪丝还没离婚的时候
and judith back when we were,you know,me and judith.
辛西亚和她丈夫是我们的好朋友
And when we were me and bill.
也是我和比尔还是夫妻的时候
What? Oh,you're not with bill anymore?
什么? 哦你已经不和比尔在一起了?
No. You know,we decided to finally stop kidding ourselves.
是啊我们最终还是决定不再自欺欺人了
You know how it is.
你也能理解的
I-I certainly do.
我-我当然能理解
No,you don'T.
不你不理解
Of course I do.
我当然能理解
Cynthia,did you get the house in the divorce?
辛西亚你离婚的时候得到房♥子了吗?
Yes.
是的
So you're not currently sleeping on your brother's hide-a-bed?
所以你现在不是睡你哥哥家的沙发床了?
No. You don't know how it is.
没有所以你不能理解
Again,completely unmotivated.
又来了真够无情的
Well,okay,it was really nice to see you again,alan.
呃能再见到你真开心艾伦
We should get together sometime and catch up.
我们应该找个时间聚一下叙叙旧
Yeah,that would be nice.
是啊那当然好了
Nice meeting you.
见到你很高兴
Bye,jake.
再见杰克
You dog. What?
你这个猪什么?
Oh,come on.
哦得了吧
The full-frontal hug,the "let's get together."
面对面的拥抱那句"我们再聚聚"
Isn't that like soccer mom talk for "do me in the cul-de-sac"?
这不就是单身母亲们表示 "在后巷上我"的暗号♥?
what are you snickering at?
你偷笑个鬼啊
Oh,tell me that's not dirty.
哦别说这是什么下流话
Go get us a table. Come on.
去给咱们找张桌子去吧
Charlie,you don't understand.
查理你不明白
She and her husband were our best friends for like ten years.
她和她丈夫差不多当了十年的好朋友
We-we traveled together,we spent vacations together...
我们-我们一起旅行一起度假...
and you never once fantasized about boinking her?
你对她从来没有过性幻想吗?
She was judith's friend.
她是朱迪丝的朋友
I was her husband's friend.
我是她丈夫的朋友
Of course I did.
我当然有过
Yeah,hi. Two regular coffees,please and,uh,one...
好吧你好请来两杯中杯咖啡还有一杯...
chocolate crappuccino with whipped cream and sprinkles.
加奶油的巧克力卡布基诺
Well,here's your chance to fulfill your fantasy.
喂这可是你实现梦想的机会
Oh,no,no,I couldn'T.
不不不我不能这么做
Why not?
为什么不?
Well,for one thing,I don't want to upset judith.
呃一方面我不想让朱迪丝难过
They're still friends.
她们还是朋友
Alan,the fact that you're still drawing breath upsets judith.
艾伦实际上你已经没有能力让朱迪丝难过了
Regardless,
不管怎么样
I-I couldn't go out with cynthia without clearing it with her first.
我-我不能在没理清楚跟她的关系之前跟辛西亚约会
Meow.
喵啪(暗示朱迪丝一直在控制艾伦)
I am not whipped.
我没受她控制
What if the positions were reversed?
如果情况相反呢?
Kekeuh,like judith was single and wanted to date you.
呃比如说朱迪丝单身她想约你出去.
I would certainly want her to check with me before I,you know,blew my brains out.
我当然希望她事先问过我呃在我开枪自杀之前
Is that all it would take? What's her number?
这就是后果吗? 她电♥话♥号♥码多少?
Where did you get that?
你从哪儿拿的?
I found it on the table.
我在桌子上发现的
Oh,jake...
哦杰克...
it's okay,I'm eating on the side without teeth marks.
没事我吃的是没被啃过的一边
Puberty,my ass. That's a missing chromosome.
青春期才怪染色体变异还差不多
No,I'm pretty sure it's a bear claw.
不我确定是个熊爪.
Two And A Half Men Season05 Episode13
好汉两个半:第五季第13集
hey,honey,how was... Not now,mom.I gotta go to the bathroom.
嗨亲爱的你... 妈现在不行我要去厕所
Please tell me you didn't let him eat a lot of crap.
告诉我你没让他吃太多垃圾食品
Let him?
让他?
Judith,our son is a billy goat.
朱迪丝咱们儿子是只公山羊
I wouldn't be surprised if he's in there pooping out tin cans.
他拉出来锡罐子我都不会吃惊
Lovely.
太好了
Uh,wait,judith,I wanted to ask you something.
呃朱迪丝等一下我想问你点事
What?
什么事?
Well,uh,we were just having coffee,and I happened to run into...
呃我们刚才喝咖啡去了我正巧碰见...
charlie,can you give us a minute?
查理能让我们单独待会儿吗?
No,I wanna watch th.
不我想看一下
Why?
为什么?
I think it might amuse me.
我觉得这能让我开心
Yeah,well,seek amusement elsewhere.
你还是去别处找乐子吧
Fine,I'll go talk to herb.
好的我去找哈珀聊天
Of all judith's husbands he's my favorite,anyway.
朱迪丝的丈夫里面他是我的最爱
You know,jake's right.
知道吗杰克说对了
Sometimes you can be hurtful for no reason at all.
有的时候你莫名其妙地就刻薄得要死
So who did you run into?
你到底遇见谁了?
cynthia sullivan.
辛西亚苏利文
Okay,so?
是吗所以?
Uh,well,I know you're still friends,and I was wondering
呃我知道你们还是朋友所以我想知道
if you'd be okay if I...
你会不会介意如果我...
asked her out.
约她出去
Fine.
没问题
Really? Sure.
真的? 当然
You're both adults,you're both single,
你们都是成年人了又都是单身
and most importantly,she won't go out with you.
最重要的是她不会跟你出去
How do you know?
你怎么知道?
I know.
我就是知道
Has she said something to you?
她跟你说过什么了吗?
No. But you're not her type.
没有但你不是她喜欢的类型
Oh,really? What is her type?
哦是吗? 她喜欢什么类型的?
Well,like her ex-husband.
哦像她前夫那种类型
Smart,funny,sensitive,good-looking.
聪明幽默体贴帅气
And that's not me?
我不是那样的吗?
No,no... you can be funny.
不不... 你可以很搞笑
Okay,okay,but if she did agree to go out with me,you'd be okay with that?
好吧但是如果她同意跟我约会呢你会不会介意?
I would,but she won'T.
我不会但她不会跟你约会
But if she did? She won'T.
但是如果她愿意呢? 她不会的
She might. She won'T.
她可能会的她绝对不会