好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S05E08
Part 2
Nov. 17, 2020, 2:07 p.m.
No.Sorry.
没有 不好意思
I'm sure you've got it worse than I do.
我相信你可能感觉更糟
Whoa,whoa,I wouldn't go that far.
等等 我还没到那程度
What I'm trying to say is there's another way to look at this.
我想说的是 换一个角度来看这事
What's that?
什么?
We're all in this together.
我们是一家人
Your brother's success is our success.
你哥哥的成功就是我们的成功
His home is our home.
他的家就是我们的家
And most importantly,when he's got a load on,his car is my car.
最重要的 等他发了 他的车就是我的
Hey,berta,guess what?
嘿 贝塔 猜怎么了
I got another big royalty check.
我拿到一大笔版税费
Oh,honey,good for you.
甜心 真好
Why don't you celebrate with a drink?
去喝一杯庆祝一下吧
I think I will.
这就去
Hey,alan,guess what?
嘿 艾伦 猜怎么了?
Yeah,I heard.
我听到了
Another big check.
有一笔大收入
Yay.
耶
You know what's a great place to pick up single moms?
你知道哪是认识单身母亲的好地方吗?
The parking lot of chuck E.Cheese.
查克E.起司的停车场
You didn'T.
你不知道
And not just moms.
不仅有母亲
Nannies,aunts,and a couple of very doable grandmas.
还有保姆 阿姨 和一些可爱的奶奶
Do you have any shame?
你不觉得羞耻吗?
No.Why?
没 怎么了?
hello?
你好?
Hang on.
等等
Who loves kids?
谁最喜欢孩子?
Oh,hey,artie,just got the check.
嘿 阿蒂 刚拿到支票
Thanks.What's up?
谢谢 什么事呢?
Sure,I'll sign some cds.
好的 我可以给CD签名
Where?
在哪?
They got bookstores just for kids?
还有专门的儿童书店?
Who knew?
谁知道啊?
Everyone but you.
所有人 除了你
Okay,I'll be there.
好的 我会去的
Thanks a lot.
非常感谢
Hey,alan,guess what?
嘿 艾伦 猜什么回事?
There's no god.
真没有天理
Oh,on the contrary,there is a god and he love me long time.
正相反 我相信有上帝 而且他会一直眷顾着我
** Who barfed in the fishbowl,who could it be?*
* 谁吐在鱼缸里 到底是谁呢?
** Who barfed in the fishbowl?*
* 谁吐在鱼缸里?
** Oh,wait,it's me everybody.*
* 噢等等 是我
** Fish food,fish food I made some fish food fish food,fish food,*
* 鱼食 鱼食 我做了鱼食
** mommy come and see.*
* 妈妈过来瞧
"Love,charlie waffles.
爱你的查理 华夫饼干
" Here you go,dakota.
给你 达科他
What do we say to mr.Waffles?
要对华夫饼干先生说什么呢?
Thank you,mr.Waffles.
谢谢 华夫饼干先生
No,thank you,sweetheart.
不谢 宝贝
And thank you,mommy.
谢谢你 妈妈
So tell me,is there a mrs.Waffles?
告诉我 有华夫饼干太太了吗?
Sadly,no.
很可惜 没有
Well,maybe this will cheer you up.
可能这能让你振奋点
Come on,honey.
走啦 宝贝
Oh,it do indeed.
噢 的确可以
The guy's a phenomenon.
这家伙真是奇才
The label's already moved a hundred thousand units in less than two weeks.
还没两周时间 他名字已经传遍了大街小巷
The wiggles can kiss my pasty,white tushie.
这神人来亲我白白的屁♥股♥都行
I'm sorry.Who are you?
不好意思 你是?
I'm artie pliskin,president and ceo of fluffy bunny records.
我是阿蒂 Pliskin Fluffy Bunny唱片公♥司♥的主席兼CEO
And you are?
那你是?
Alan,charlie's brother.
艾伦 他的弟弟
Oh,you're the sponge.
你就是那寄生虫
Pleasure.
高兴认识你
Same here.
我也是
Do you believe in god,artie?
阿蒂 你相信上帝吗?
I'll tell you what I believe in.
我告诉你我相信什么
Regular prostate exams,full release massage
定期的前列腺检查 欲♥仙♥欲♥死♥的按♥摩♥
and charlie freakin' waffles.
还有这要命的查理 华夫饼干
Okay,kids,charlie waffles needs to take a little potty break,but he'll be right back.
孩子们 查理 华夫饼干去休息会 很快就回来哦
In the meantime,why don't you all sing along.
对了 大家一起唱唱歌♥吧
here,put this in the mommy and me pile.
把这个放进"妈咪和我"的文件夹
I'll be right back.
我马上回来
Alan,this is nothing compared to the concert he's going to give next weekend.
艾伦 跟他下周末举办的音乐会相比 这根本不值一提
C-concert?
音-音乐会?
C-concert?
音-音乐会?
1,200 screaming kids and moms
1200个兴奋尖叫的孩子和妈咪
all dying to hear charlie waffles sing in person.
迫不及待要看查理 华夫饼干现场演出
At 50 bucks a pop.
每人50美金
Wait a minute.He's going to make...
等等 他要赚...
$60,000 off one concert?
一场音乐会就赚6万美金?
Yeah.
是的
Good time to be a sponge,huh?
揩油的好时机吧?
I'm not doing any concerts.
我不开音乐会
Why not?
干吗不?
'Cause I'm not.Case closed.
不开就是不开 没得商量
What's up with him?
他怎么回事?
It would appear he's displeased with the latest gold nugget to fall out of his ass.
看起来他并不满意 刚从他屁♥眼♥里掉出来的那金块
Yeah,well,trust me.
是的 相信我
The gold's gonna keep comin' even if I have to get it myself.
财源会滚滚而来的 即便得我亲自去挖
so...
所以...
waffle for your thoughts?
给你块华夫 说说你的想法?
Leave me alone.
别来烦我
I don't understand.
我不明白
I would think a sold-out concert would be good news
我认为音乐会票子销♥售♥一空
for charlie waffles.
对查理 华夫饼干而言是好消息
Yeah,well,it's not.
好吧 不是
Because?
因为?
You ever wonder why i never played in a band?
你就不好奇我为什么从不参与乐队表演?
I just figured you were already getting laid so much,being in a rock band would seem redundant.
我只当你睡了太多人 加入摇滚乐队会显得多余
That's not the reason.
不是这个原因
Although I did do better than most bass players.
尽管我比大多数贝斯手更有一手
Okay,then what is the reason?
好吧 那是出于什么原因?
I have stage fright.
我怯场
You have stage fright?
你怯场?
Severe,debilitating,wet-your-pants stage fright.
很严重的怯场 会虚到尿裤子
I don't understand.
我不明白
I've seen you perform.
我看过你表演
Well,sure,in the living room for a couple of people.
当然 在客厅为几个人表演
But on a stage with lights,in front of a crowd that's paying to see me?
可在灯光舞台上 面对一大群付钱看我演出的人?
do you literally pee your pants?
你真的尿过裤子?
What difference does it make?
这有什么区别?
I'm just saying your audience is composed of a lot of bed-wetters.
我不过是说 你的大多数观众都会尿裤子
They might get a kick out of seeing you soil yourself.
也许见你自潮 他们会激动不已
And you think that would be funny?
你觉得这很好笑?
Well,I wouldn't,but I'm not your audience.
不觉得 可我不是你的观众
hello.
你好
I don't know what to tell you,artie.
我不知道该怎么跟你说 阿蒂
I can't do it.
我办不到
I don't need a reason why.
我不需要理由
Just tell him the truth.
跟他实话实说不就行了
It's show business,alan.
这是演出 艾伦
You don't tell people the truth.
你不能告诉别人实情
Look,I'll make the cds.
听着 我会灌录唱片
I'll shoot the commercials.
我会拍广♥告♥片
I'll even do the bookstores.
我甚至会签名售唱片
Just no concerts.
只是不开音乐会
Hey,I don't have to do anything.
嘿 我什么都不用做
Oh,yeah,what are you gonna do,sue me?
哦哟 你想怎样 告我啊?
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
剧集 | 好汉两个半（2003） | 导航列表